


Hakama Dake

by Indygodusk



Category: Rurouni Kenshin
Genre: Bare Skin, F/M, Families of Choice, Flirting, Introspection, Love Confessions, Making Out, No Sex, Ogling, Pining, Sexual Tension, True Love, delusions of birds, lots of feels, lots of making out, lots of talking, puns, relationship resolution, talking about feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-05-08
Updated: 2016-06-15
Packaged: 2018-07-15 06:42:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 59,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7212038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Indygodusk/pseuds/Indygodusk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>During a heat wave, Kaoru finds herself alone, frustrated, and extremely hot.  Defeated by Kenshin's friendly behavior, she gives up on his love. But she refuses to lose to the sun.  Clothes start to fly, but no one's there to see, right? (From 2005)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Liquid Heat

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin and its characters do not belong to me. Alas!  
> This was my first (and still most popular) fanfic, written back in 2005 - 2006.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is a bad romance novel cover blurb of the story written by katyclismic. I had to share.
> 
> On the front cover:
> 
> Hakama Dake
> 
> Indygodusk
> 
> 1000 reviews in print!
> 
> A partially-dressed, improbably endowed brunette is gazing up in bewilderment, ruby lips slightly parted, at a redheaded man trapping her against the wall, who, against all internal description, is apparently six feet tall, square-jawed and rippling with bronzed muscles, as you can see through his half-off shirt. There's undoubtedly wind-blown hair and shiny skin somewhere in there, too.
> 
> On the back:
> 
> "The Battousai Kenshin has a violent past, and it's not one he's willing to inflict on tempestuous Kaoru Kamiya, no matter how seductive she is! A raven-haired beauty with a kind heart, Kaoru's own search for love and acceptance is hindered by her confusion at Kenshin's dark mystery! Can their love break through the wall of silence they've created? The two find their hearts on a hot summer's day, where the only possible way to bear the heat is in
> 
> HAKAMA DAKE."

**("** Startled" art by blushinglily aka animeguzeman)

 

Blowing sweat-spiked bangs out of her face, Kaoru sneaked another peak at the front gate from the corner of her eye.

_Still nothing._

Not that there was anyone around to see her turning yet again toward the gate, but if there were someone there to see, she wouldn't want them to get any funny ideas - like she was lonely. Because she wasn't, she was just fine. _Right, so no need to go over there again and leave this nice cool… er nice not-hot shade,_ she thought, trying to convince herself from her position leaning limply against the dojo wall.

From its scant grey shade, Kaoru watched the heat radiating from the ground in liquid waves. With her eyes squinted slightly, she could almost imagine herself standing on the stone bridge of a water garden instead of the wooden porch of a dojo. From the corner of her eye, she might faintly see the dark red hair of the man molding his firmly muscled chest against her back, moist breath whispering past her ear as his elegant fingers pointed out the beauty of the koi swimming below. Momentarily mesmerized by her thoughts, Kaoru stared dreamily until the prosaic feeling of sweat trickling into her ear recalled her to the solitary present and the feel of the firm wall, not man, at her back. Jolted back to the present, she once again contemplated the gate.

"One more look can't hurt, right?" she sighed to herself. _After all I wouldn't want to be rude and resume my practice right before they got here, because then they might have to_ _interrupt me, and then they'd feel bad and I'd feel bad and it would be… bad. Right, so one more look just to be polite._ Pleased with her justification, Kaoru stepped off the porch.

Mincing quickly over the scorching ground to the miniscule shade of the gate, she held a sword-calloused hand above her squinting eyes in the hope she'd see something different from the last five times and last five excuses she'd used to peer down the hazy dirt road leading into central Tokyo.

_Empty._

The flat metallic blue sky seemed to mock her efforts, though how an empty sky could mock she couldn't quite explain. But she'd swear it did!

Staring cross-eyed at a bead of sweat perched on her nose, Kaoru swore at the relentless heat. It was a word a lady shouldn't know, much less use. She'd learned it from Sano, of course.

For three weeks they had all been forced to endure the worst heat wave to hit the town EVER, at least in Kaoru's expert opinion. Even old Hanaike-san selling wilted flowers in the market, who was so wilted herself this summer that Kaoru feared she might not live to see the next, agreed that she could barely remember another summer as hot.

Of course Ishida-san, the surly vegetable seller in the next booth, had to disagree. He swore that we were both weak females unable to take a mild summer. _Mild my foot! If it was so mild, why did all of his produce look so limp and pasty? And weak females!_ Kaoru wanted to roll up her sleeves and show him how to make mochi with his face. Only her self-control on remembering that the money saved on his cheap produce made it possible to buy enough food to feed everyone at her dojo kept him safe, that and Hanaike-san's hands clutching at her arm. Well, okay, so it had mostly been the restraining hands on her arm. Still, she hadn't bashed him, and that was the important thing.

On the opposite horizon a few clouds massed like a distant beach beckoning to shipwrecked sailors. Of course, sailors wanted to escape the water, whereas she desperately hoped the clouds would bring in barrels of it as rain and relief from the fierce summer sun.

"Come on clouds, you know you want to come over here," Kaoru wheedled. "I'll even make you dinner if you bring us some rain." Not noticing any discernable movement, she crossed her arms and pouted, "Mou, alright, I'll have _Kenshin_ make you dinner." At that moment she felt it, a wisp of breeze ruffling through her bangs and tickling her cheeks.

"Yes! You've got yourself a deal," she shouted with a bounce and raised fist. Caroling Kenshin's name she turned towards the house, lifted her foot, paused, and then set it back down.

_Oh, right, they're still in town. At Megumi's._

She lovely the feisty doctor, she really did. But hadn't she heard that people are more likely to be killed by family or friends than by strangers? Because Kaoru privately thought that Megumi should worry less about the dangers of walking home alone late at night, and more about being nice to a certain kenjutsu instructor. One of these days that Fox was going to go too far in her teasing and flirting, and Kaoru wouldn't be able to restrain herself.

Kaoru kept meaning to think up a mantra in for those situations when Megumi's behavior tempted her to snap, some sort of perfect meditation technique. But before she could get past, "Megumi is a good person. I should not maim Megumi," images of the Fox running her hands up the seam of Kenshin's magenta gi while cooing something seductive would flash through Kaoru's mind. And then instead of thinking peaceful Zen-like thoughts, her mind would dwell on ripping out hair, snapping fingers, and smashing ruby red lips into mud-caked streets. With this heat wave that wasn't possible now, of course, mud being a thing of the happy wet past, but given the opportunity, Kaoru felt confident she could come up with an appropriate substitute.

Turning away from the road, Kaoru finally conceded that her boys had probably decided to eat lunch in town. _Be honest Kaoru,_ it only made sense since, _who would want to walk out of their way to the edge of town in this hellish heat if they didn't have to? Especially since they would have to turn around and walk back to the clinic after eating. Plus they would probably have to make the food themselves, since no one really likes your cooking._

 _There are a few dishes I've mastered though,_ she refuted to herself.

_Mastered?_

_Well, mastered was perhaps a strong word, but not everything I make tastes terrible… just most things,_ she conceded to herself with a sigh.

_Yes, they probably ate at the clinic with Megumi, whom I bet never argues with herself._

_We don't know that, she has had a hard life. Just because she doesn't talk to herself out loud like you do…._

"Oh shut up," Kaoru yelled at herself.

She had hoped that Kenshin at least might think, might want to come back and eat with her. She would have walked into town to eat with him, if he'd asked. If he asked it, she'd walk anywhere. Not that he had asked anything of her, or that she had asked him to come back for lunch, but she'd hoped, hoped that he cared enough to think of her.

"Kaoru-baka, you know he cares for you… like a little sister," she snorted at herself in disgust. Sometimes he would say or do something so sweet, that she would let herself hope. She could almost swear that she had caught a look in his eye a time or two, the kind of look a man gives a woman he wants, a woman he desires as more than just a landlady and friend. But before she could even catch her breath in surprise, the look would vanish, leaving only her mild-mannered, amethyst-eyed rurouni.

A misunderstanding last week combined with a chance meeting had been the last straw. It was a small thing, involving Kenshin picking up a supposed present in the market that turned out to really be a paper wrapped fish she'd prepaid for earlier in the week and forgotten. It had been silly to believe Tae's remarks about the package she said she saw him holding.

Tae had made a teasing remark about seeing Kenshin with a courting gift and Kaoru had fallen for it hook, line, and sinker. When the two met up to walk back home, she had blushed and acted so silly until in confusion he'd let out an "Oro," and changed the subject to the dinner menu - fish. Only then did she make the connection between the conversation, the fishy smell, and the package in his arms. Continuing to talk about the rising price of food, she prayed that he stayed clueless about her stupid assumption.

A few minutes after this embarrassment, they had been hailed by a heavily pregnant young woman and her beaming husband Masuhiro, a former neighbor of the Kamiya Dojo. The two were visiting his parents. Masuhiro's wife was pregnant with her third child, despite being only a year younger than Kaoru herself.

After a short conversation, both couples moved on. But Kaoru noted to herself that only one of the couples walking away actually was a couple. Kenshin must have noticed her silence on the walk home, her awkward distress that that had grown larger ever since they met up outside the market, but thankfully he hadn't commented on it beyond a few searching looks.

Back home, Yahiko returned from working at the Akabeko as the orange sun quenched itself in the bamboo-foamed hills. With Megumi and Sano in tow, he was just in time to help set the table for dinner. Usually Kaoru loved dinners where all of her friends showed up. Usually, but since Tae owned the Akabeko, she had gossiped with Yahiko that day about her suspicions. He of course told the others and had to ask about the supposed present.

Kaoru tried to pass the truth off with a chuckle and quickly change the subject, without success. Yahiko and Megumi kept laughing and taunting her about her mistake, while Sano chewed on his fishbone and smirked, teasing everyone equally until the conversation finally moved on. Kaoru had yelled back and waved her shinai threateningly as usual, but her heart wasn't fully in it.

Right after Yahiko's question, Kenshin's face had looked startled and a bit odd. For a moment, it held an expression she'd never seen before. Most likely he was feeling guilty and embarrassed that she would expect a courting gift from him. That it wasn't the first time she'd made such a mistake made it even worse.

That night she couldn't seem to fall asleep. Even darkness didn't offer a complete break from the moist heat. Combined with her turbulent thoughts, Kaoru found sleep impossible. At least on the porch she could sometimes catch a slight breeze that would otherwise miss her lying inside on her futon. That humid night, sitting outside staring musingly at an opal-hued crescent moon, Kaoru felt something inside herself shift.

She loved Kenshin. He drove her crazy sometimes, but she really and truly loved him. She loved his kindness and laughter, his integrity and fierce protectiveness. Even his darkness, the part of his past that was Battousai, when he had given himself passionately to an ideal and nearly destroyed himself in the process.

Kaoru had rarely seen that intense piece of his personality. It scared her a little, the great destruction he was capable of. Yet almost from the start, she had trusted him. Learning of his past had not changed that. She tried to accept people for who they were trying to be now, not who they had been.

She trusted Kenshin to contain his capacity for violence, to not allow it to escape arbitrarily. Hadn't his actions so far against enemies like Jineh, Aoshi, Soujirou, Shishio, and Enishi proved his control? Things had gotten close a few times, but in the end he had kept to his vow of not using his sword to kill (She'd decided Shishio didn't count. In her mind, his death was self-inflicted immolation with a little help, and good riddance).

Sometimes, when she woke up in the shadowy hours before dawn's pale illumination, Kaoru would wonder how it would feel to have Battousai's passion and intensity focused on her. Imagining those golden eyes devouring her own, his calloused fingers tracing the planes of her face, she would shiver and feel her body hum, throbbing and aching in secret places.

Despite these thoughts, Kaoru knew that not all hopes and dreams came true. As a young girl running around with skinned knees, bringing injured birds to her mother, watching her father gently smile at them both, Kaoru had imagined herself at this age. That vision had included a loving husband, children and a bustling dojo inhabited by proud parents. Her younger self never could have imagined such a situation as she now found herself in. She may not have any of the things she once wanted, but she did have her adopted family. They drove away the loneliness and took care of each other. She would die for them. 'If she didn't kill one of them first, that is,' she'd thought at the time with a smirk.

Deep down, where she never even mentioned it aloud, she desperately yearned for a husband and child. She tried not to let the others know of the jealousy, the aching arms she felt when seeing someone like Masuhiro's pregnant wife. It was one of the dreams she had hoped Kenshin would help her fill. Looking at the moon, Kaoru told herself that she still had time for this dream. She had time, but she couldn't continue wasting it. If she wanted a child, she would have to find someone besides Kenshin to be her husband, no matter how much that thought hurt.

Kaoru was going to stop trying to make Kenshin love her. She would move on for real this time and settle for the friendship he was willing to give. It wasn't fair for her to make him feel guilty for being unable to give her what she needed. As long as he was happy, she would be able to go on, and perhaps one day find happiness for herself.

Kaoru hated being idle. It gave her too much time to think depressing thoughts. She had expected to be busy this morning helping teach classes at Tomoaki-Sensei's dojo. And consequently earning next month's food money. Instead, classes had been cancelled. The students were all involved in digging a new well on the other end of town in hope of creating another source of water closer than the river. Looking at the clouds blowing their way, she wondered if they would finish the well if it rained, or abandon it until the next dry spell. She wished them luck, but mourned the loss of income.

Without many students at the dojo, Kaoru's new family had teetered on the edge of starvation several times, although Kaoru had successfully hidden it. Borrowing leftovers from Tae and begging for work from rival dojo had been some of the most degrading experiences of her life, but it was worth it to see Kenshin, Yahiko, Sano, and even Megumi happily eating at the dinner table. Of course, then Yahiko had to go and call her busu, making her wonder why she even tried to keep the brat around.

Deep down she knew she wouldn't trade any of her adopted strays for anything.

But sometimes she really wished there was a bottom to those pits Sano and Yahiko called stomachs. Or maybe she wished they'd be just a bit better at reading the things she didn't say.

Many things she had no trouble telling them, at the top of her lungs no less. But asking for help with something like money was different. This family she had drawn to herself had come at her invitation. As the owner of the dojo, she felt that it was her responsibility to feed and clothe them as best she could. She just sometimes wished that one of them would take the initiative to bring in some extra food or income for the household themselves. Well, not Kenshin, he worked and worried hard enough already. If he thought himself a burden, he might leave, and that was the last thing she wanted.

None of them were rich, and she tried not to begrudge the others the little they managed to claim for themselves. Though sometimes, when Sano wasted all of his money on gambling or sake, and then came over to bum a meal, she would get so frustrated that she would want to scream and pound him with her shinai. Which often happened, come to think of it? Usually though, it felt good just knowing she successfully took care of everyone. She would put up with just about anything to keep her new family together.

Yahiko had started growing so quickly lately that almost before she knew it, she found herself spending most of her small household savings on a new hakama and kimono to contain his sprouting limbs. The brat needed new clothing more than she needed a new kimono. By covering the worn out spots of her faded kimono with fabric from a slightly less worn obi, she had managed to put off necessity for a little while longer.

The first time she had shown up to breakfast wearing her creation, Kenshin had asked why she hadn't allowed him to alter it for her. Unstated was that besides being a better cook, Kenshin could also sew better than Kaoru. Unstated, that is, until Yahiko opened his big fat mouth. Yet behind the teasing, Kaoru had caught a flash of uncertainty in Yahiko's eyes as he fingered the sleeve of his new kimono. So, after a few loving taps with a soup ladle, she declared that she couldn't bear to part with the kimono yet, and that she didn't want to hear another word about her sewing skills. _While the seams weren't perfect, at least they were mostly straight, mou!_ Her explanation and beating seemed to drive the worry from Yahiko's eyes, so Kaoru was content. She just hoped it sidetracked Kenshin too.

Shaking off her musings, Kaoru went back into the dojo. If she was going to be alone, she'd continue to use the time to work on her perfecting her art, hopefully shutting down her fretting mind in the process.

Kaoru opened up all of the shoji to try and catch some hint of a cool breeze while she practiced. For years she had struggled with an advanced kata only poorly remembered. The uninitiated might think it complete, but she could feel the missing pieces when she practiced. Her father had died before he finished polishing her moves. Both of them had expected to have more time. Wiping the sweat from her face and neck one last time before she started, Kaoru picked up her bokken and moved to the center of the wooden floor.

An old student of her father's named Tomoaki had married into another dojo years ago and given up Kamiya Kasshin Ryu at the insistence of his new father-in-law. As a child, she had idealized Tomoaki-senpai. Full of patience, he would let her follow him around asking questions, and would correct her strokes and stance. Sometimes she would peak through the open shoji to watch and sigh over his private lessons with her father, and the dimple in his left cheek. _Probably_ _my first crush,_ Kaoru thought with a wistful smile as she shifted into the first stance.

When he married, she had cried and moped for days. As he became busy with his new family and responsibilities, especially learning the new style he would be teaching at his father-in-law's dojo, their families gradually lost contact. Kaoru became resigned, even if she did think the father-in-law was a mean ugly tyrant to forbid Tomoaki the Kamiya Dojo, and that if she ever met his new family she would throw mud at them. At the time of her father's funeral, she hadn't seen him for several years.

Then a couple of months ago, she'd run into him (literally) at Megumi's clinic. He had been bringing in an injured student, she had been chasing after a cackling Yahiko who was trying to hide behind a placating Kenshin. Perhaps it was the brandished bokken or the enraged tanuki eyes, but he had immediately recognized her. For a moment, seeing that dimple, she had felt ten years old again and dazzled.

He'd invited her to dine with his family the next evening. His father-in-law had died a few years earlier, so Kaoru didn't have to worry about concealing her childish antipathy if she met him at dinner. In fact, the worst moment that first night came when she almost blurted out her curiosity about how his wife turned out so nice with such an awful man for a father. Luckily she managed to bite her tongue just in time, almost choking herself on a sip of tea in the process. After meeting his adorable wife and son, Kaoru felt the last of her resentment toward Tomoaki's new family die, replaced with a budding affection.

Later that week, she ran into him again. Instead of the once fierce flush that used to consume her face, Kaoru felt only a warm tingling, like the comfort of hot tea on a cold night. As if regaining an old friend wasn't enough to make her exuberant, Tomoaki had an offer to make - he wanted her help teaching in his dojo. It seemed that one of his best students had moved away, leaving him in need of another instructor to help with the less advanced students.

Reminiscing with him about the past between lessons, Kaoru had let slip a bit of her frustration at not having been able to completely master Kamiya Kasshin Ryu before her father's death. Those few awkward passes in the advanced kata, perhaps only noticed by her, were driving her crazy. If only she could remember!

Tomoaki's kind face had taken on such a serious cast during that conversation. Kaoru had felt shame well up after revealing to him such a fault, and the conversation had turned back to memories, as both of them remembered the great man that had been her father.

From the center of the dojo, Kaoru tried to focus her mind as she moved quickly into the whirl of the advanced kata she was determined to perfect today. She felt her toes flex on the wooden floor as she brought her bokken down and to the side in a horizontal slash that hissed through the air.

The next day, Tomoaki had stopped by the Kamiya Dojo. "For the joy I once received from your father and his dojo, I would be honored if you would allow me to help you perfect the advanced forms I once was taught," he had formally offered.

Embarrassment and astonishment had Kaoru instinctively shaking her head, but he was undeterred, "Though I no longer practice Kamiya Kasshin Ryu, and can likely no longer do my Sensei proper justice, I would not be at ease if I did not offer this. Please do me the favor of accepting."

Taking a deep breath, Kaoru had lifted her eyes from the teacup gently steaming in her trembling hands to stare out the open shoji. She couldn't let her pride and independence make her reject the chance to learn and master more of her family's art, however tempting and habitual. Her ancestors would not think less of her for needing outside help to do the dojo honor.

Unable to summon the words, she had only managed to set her teacup down, bow herself to the floor, and choke out her acceptance with one word, "Sensei."

Yesterday, he had showed her the last move that he had to teach her, the last that he could remember to smooth her form. Pivoting on her heel quickly as she brought her bokken up, Kaoru finished the kata, held herself still for a count of ten, and then launched into the form again. She could feel the difference, the rightness as all of her limbs seemed to click into place. With the touches to the kata she had struggled with for years now hers, Kaoru was determined to use this extra practice time to make her movements seamless.

 _Even if I have been practicing already for hours alone in the dojo without mistake, and with no one coming home for what looks like hours yet,_ she mused a bit gruffly. Yahiko was helping out at the Akabeko again today, and probably wouldn't be home until dusk. Megumi had some repairs she wanted done to the clinic roof, and had managed to manipulate Sano and Kenshin into coming over this morning to do it. Kaoru had only escaped since she was supposed to teach at Tomoaki's dojo.

By now it seemed as if Megumi had manipulated them into staying for the rest of the day since none of them had come back to the dojo for lunch, despite Kaoru's hopeful watch of the road. She couldn't really blame them. The Fox could cook food that even Kaoru had to admit, under her breath when she was alone, was mouthwatering. After all, they had Megumi right there, so no need for sweaty travel to see a tanuki. Kaoru found herself scowling at her thoughts, _Alright, so I can blame them, the traitors._

Practice time was important, but being alone all day long reminded her of the bad times before Kenshin came and she was all alone. Swinging her bokken extra hard, Kaoru continued thinking about her friends in town. Megumi would probably keep Kenshin and Sano busy all day doing chores, despite the heat. That Fox always managed to manipulate people into doing her dirty work.

"She probably just wants to see the two of them bare-chested sweating above her," Kaoru muttered to herself mid-swing. Thinking over what she had just said, Kaoru turned bright pink and stumbled through the leg sweep she had previously executed perfectly. She wouldn't mind seeing that herself, now that she thought about it. _The two of them working shirtless on the roof I mean! Not the other way around. Well, not with Sano at least._

_Kenshin on the other hand… no no, bad Kaoru! You know thoughts like this will only get you hot and bothered, well, more hot and bothered than you already are in this heat, and disgruntled about your new resolution about a certain sexy red-head. Not sexy, unavailable! Unavailable red-head you mean, remember?_

Kata ruined, she went over to the wall where she had placed a jug of water and a ladle. Kaoru took a large drink trying to bring herself under control, but the water was warm and not much help quenching her real thirst. Her sweat soaked gi clung to her back and chest in sticky patches, and she'd long since abandoned her sodden tabi.

If this heat didn't ease up soon, Kaoru thought she might go crazy. She'd start screaming at the sadistic sun, strip off her clothes, and try to drown herself in the river. _Come_ _on rain clouds, get here already,_ she complained to the sky.

A faint intermittent breeze swirled through the dojo briefly, bringing a moment's relief. Flapping the damp fabric away from her chest in an attempt to cool off, Kaoru looked down with a considering frown. If men could do it on a public roof or in a field, why couldn't she do it in the privacy of her own dojo?

After all, Megumi had offered to let the boys eat dinner as well as lunch at the clinic if the repair work ran that late (like she'd let them go before she'd sucked them dry), besides which Sano was never one to pass up Megumi's food. With Yahiko at the Akabeko, Kaoru calculated that she'd probably have the dojo all to herself for hours yet. A bit of a depressing thought, but she would use this mischief to distract herself. If she closed the dojo's shoji that faced the front gate, no one would be able to see into the dojo, and if she locked the gate, no one would be able to come in and circle around without her knowing.

Kaoru flinched as a drop of sweat trickled down to sting her eye. "Ow, that does it," she fumed, rubbing her eye while stomping toward the gate to lock it. Hesitating, she took a quick glance down both sides of the road, but could see no travelers in either direction: No Kenshin, Sano or Yahiko, no politicians or sword-bearing travelers, nobody. So she shut and latched the gate decisively, stalked back to the dojo, and slid the few shoji facing the gate closed. The shoji at the sides and back she left open to catch the breeze.

Maybe it was the heat going to her head, or maybe it was reminiscing about how she had survived alone as the only female kendo instructor in Tokyo. Whatever it was, Kaoru had decided to act on her impulse to prove that despite her failure with Kenshin, she was still that strong, unconventional woman who could fix her problems herself – starting with the hot chaffing of her sweat soaked gi.

Pulling her gi out from the hakama required a bit more effort than she expected, especially since she refused to untie the hakama first. With a final grunt of effort, she wrenched it free and peeled it down her arms. Without the bulk of the gi, her dark blue hakama slid perilously low on her hips. She barely noticed though, too enchanted by the feeling of the faint breeze trailing cooling fingers over her flushed skin. "Mmmm," she moaned, _that's nice._

Only the cloth wound around her chest interrupted the sensation. Lifting her hair off her neck with one hand, she fingered the edge of her breast binding with the other. Oh, she was sorely tempted by the caress of coolness working its way across her shoulders. _Should I?_ she mused wickedly to herself, looking down at the cream colored cloth.

 _But I am here to train and bouncing hurts, not that I have a lot to be bounced, unlike a certain Fox._ She stopped fingering the cloth and bopped herself on the head. _Bad girl, no more thinking or comparing yourself to Megumi for the rest of the day… or at least an hour._ Kaoru found it important to set realistic goals for herself.

 _Now think something positive to cheer yourself up. Um… at least my chest isn't as small as Misao's!_ She felt a bit bad putting Misao down just to make herself feel better, even in her mind. _Well Misao's young and could still be growing,_ she thought in an attempt to be positive.

 _And I also, without comparison to anyone else, have a great, um, a cute, ah,_ looking around and down, (she didn't think having a hard and shiny bokken counted) Kaoru noticed two things at once. One, _has my hakama always been that low?_ and two, _I have a really cute belly button, like a little tea cup!_ Pleased with herself, Kaoru declared her pep talk done and walked to the center of the dojo to begin. Her mind, however, had a few last comments. _Why a tea cup? Do you expect someone to drink out of your belly button?_

At this random and racy thought Kaoru had a sudden visual of a red tongue lapping slow circles around her stomach, coming closer and closer to her liquid filled center. When the mouth finally reached her belly button, she felt the lips nibbling and suckling softly. "Jasmine tea, my favorite," his voice huskily proclaimed before giving her stomach a sharp nip, leaving a small love-bite behind along with a few red hairs.

Letting out a gasping wheeze, she shook herself from the daydream. Letting go of her hair, she wiped her palms down the front of her hakama, and then picked up her bokken from the floor where she'd placed it before removing her gi. As she straightened, the touch of hair sliding along her shoulders and back felt almost like phantom fingernails tracing on the naked skin. Kaoru shivered. She wasn't used to the sensation, since the only times her back was uncovered was when she was changing or about to take a bath. Usually she was too distracted or tired at those times to think much of it. Focusing on the tickling right now though, she found it very … sensual. It made her feel languid and very feminine.

Going into the first stance, Kaoru bent her knees and raised the bokken above her head. This caused the slits in the sides of the hakama, from mid-thigh to waist where the ties wrapped, to gape open. She blushed at the feel of the wind whisping her thighs. _Oh, I forgot about those._ Feeling a moment of trepidation, she looked back at her sweat-soaked gi tossed on the ground but the coolness of the intermittent breeze won out. _No one can see anyway, since I locked the gate and closed the doors facing the street. So relax._

Feeling the warm wood of the dojo floor beneath her toes, she let out a slow breath and centered herself. Pivoting slowly on the balls of her feet, she brought the bokken down, then horizontal. Each movement was controlled, precise, and flowed in the next seamlessly.

After one slow performance, Kaoru repeated it a little faster, and then faster still, until she was a blur around the dojo, hair occasionally whipping her bare forearms and thighs in stinging lines. Her lips tasted of bitter dust and salty sweat, but the air was sweet. On sharp turns sweat would fling off to splatter on the floorboards. Finally, after a last spring and slash she froze, panting audibly in the sun-flecked wooden dojo. Lowering her bokken and relaxing her stance, Kaoru turned and placed it on its designated stand.

Returning to the center of the dojo, she raised her hands above her head in a stretch. Arching her back and rising to her toes, she let out a mewl of satisfaction. During the stretch her hakama slipped a few more fingers, barely managing to stay on the swell of her hips, but she was too pleased with herself to care. Returning to her heels with a contented sigh, she heard a growl. Opening her eyes in surprise and turning towards the sound, Kaoru found herself staring straight into a pair of gleaming gold eyes.

[](http://negotiatrix.deviantart.com/art/No-one-s-there-to-see-right-27358407?q=favby%3AIndygodusk%2F38249140&qo=5)(“No one's there to see, right?” art by Negotiatrix)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got a lot of lovely fanart for this story, but I've lost most of the links. I'll try to make a separate post later with the art and links that I can still find.  
> Japanese meanings:  
> Hakama - The skirt-like pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear. It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them.  
> Dake – Only, just  
> Kenjutsu – Fencing  
> Kata – Martial arts form; a set series of standardized moves  
> Busu – Ugly woman, hag (Yahiko's favorite appellation for Kaoru)
> 
> I had fun with names too:  
> Hanaike – flower pond  
> Ishida – stone field  
> Masuhiro – broad profit  
> Tomoaki – Village friend


	2. A Bird Growls

_During the stretch her hakama slipped a few more fingers, barely managing to stay on the swell of her hips, but she was too pleased with herself to care. Returning to her heels with a contented sigh, she heard a growl. Opening her eyes in surprise and turning towards the sound, Kaoru found herself staring straight into a pair of gleaming gold eyes._

For a moment the breath caught in her throat as Kaoru felt a zing of shock race through her body. Then, shoulders relaxing, she walked to the edge of the porch and leaned out with an inviting smile. "Are you here for your private lesson? I've been waiting." Her voice sound huskier than usual due to the dryness of her throat.

Cocking his head, the small cinnamon colored sparrow let out an inquisitive chirp from its position on the pine branch. Kaoru had to chuckle at herself. For a second there, she had let her sun-warped imagination get away from her and imagined that it was Kenshin's golden eyes perusing her scantily clad form. _You wish_ , she thought wistfully. Then again, what would she do if it was him? Battousai in all his passionate glory, coming to… smile sexily and embrace her to his manly chest?

_Ha, yeah right!_ With her luck, any yellow-eyed man would probably end up being Saito with his stinky cigarette and wolfish smirk coming to arrest her for indecency.

"For such moral corruption, Aku Soku Zan!" and then bam, so ends the dreams of one Kamiya Kaoru.

_You know, even more disturbing than the thought of him killing me is the thought of him smirking at me when I'm half-naked, ewww._

Straightening up and tossing her long black hair back over her shoulder, Kaoru decided to get another drink to wash the dryness from her throat and the dirty and/or disturbing thoughts from her mind.

At her movement, the small sparrow rustled its wings and puffed up the pale feathers of its chest, _maybe in sympathetic disgust?_ Then let out an even higher pitched cheep.

When Kaoru first met Kenshin and heard his high sweet voice, she'd wondered a bit if he'd ever suffered from having his voice 'break.' She certainly couldn't imagine his voice any higher pitched. His short stature, only a few fingers taller than her, didn't help his case either.

Not to say she didn't love the sound of his voice, she did. It reminded her of eating ohagi: sweet, smooth, and comforting, capable of silliness as it changed form to fit the occasion, but at heart the same dependable taste.

It took the fight with Jineh to reveal that his voice could drop octaves deeper. Deep with a throbbing growl that Kaoru swore she could almost feel thrumming through the soles of her feet.

His voice didn't descend often. In fact, she had marked that his rare changes of register almost always accompanied an emotionally charged moment: usually anger, pain, or sorrow, but extremely rarely, tenderness.

It had been almost two months since the last time she'd heard it. Suzume and Ayame, Dr. Genzai's granddaughters, had been dropped off at the dojo last minute when an accident diverted the good doctor from their planned picnic. Disheartened, the little girls had sat on the porch pouting and kicking their legs against the wooden boards until, in exasperation, Kaoru had abandoned her practicing and offered to take them on a picnic herself.

Of course they invited Kenshin, and the now merry foursome marched off for a day full of woodland splendor. Eating a dessert of apple slices carved into bunnies (Kenshin's work naturally), they had laughed and played games until, exhausted, the girls collapsed onto the blue blanket for a nap.

Suzume's soft snores started only seconds after her head touched the blanket, but Ayame proved much more mulish. Lying with one arm curled under her head, Ayame fixed her gaze upon Kenshin's reclining form as if working on a puzzle. Her large brown eyes blinked slowly, hesitating with crescent lashes pillowed on pink cheeks before stubbornly rising again.

Finally the small girl scooted herself over until she was right next to Kenshin and began playing drowsily with the frayed hem of his hakama. Smiling tenderly down at the sticky fingers, he spoke gently, "You should sleep a little, that you should."

Her fingers stopped twisting, but still clutched at his hem. Suddenly she spoke up drowsily, "Ken-nii…?"

"Yes?" he prompted after a moment of silence.

Her eyes had finally drifted shut when she sighed, "Do you… love us?"

Kaoru couldn't see his face tilted down toward the small child as it was, so she missed his expression. However, it made her listen even more closely to his voice, so she caught the dip in register as he replied.

"Of course I do little one, of course."

A small smile bowed her pink lips. "Good, cause we love you," she sighed again before snuggling against his leg and finally succumbing to sleep.

"Of course I do," he repeated, almost sub-audibly, in that rare, deep, rich thrum.

Unwilling to break the charged silence, Kaoru gently laid her hand on his shoulder. After a moment, not wanting to intrude upon his ruminations, she started to slip off her hand. As her fingertips left the warm material of his magenta gi, he turned slightly and grasped her hand, squeezing firmly as he briefly met her eyes.

Though only for a split second, Kaoru noticed the pink, purple, and gold kaleidoscope of his eyes: as if a swirl of windblown petals, cherry and plum, flitted across the path of the sun. More evidence in her evolving theory of the enigma Himura Kenshin: deshi, Battousai, rurouni, and current resident of the Kamiya Dojo.

While Kaoru would be the first to admit that there were many things she didn't know about Kenshin, she still liked to believe that over a year of extensive, perhaps some would say obsessive, study had paid off.

Kenshin had an almost superhuman control; she might even go so far as to say control was one of the central tenets in his life. Only a warrior with such great physical, mental, and spiritual control could have achieved the reputation as the greatest swordsman in Japan.

The largest chink in his control though, that was caused by his emotions. He cared too much. Luckily for Kenshin, his emotions often make him stronger, at least in her opinion. But somewhere along the way, perhaps when his wife Tomoe died, or at the end of the revolution, the pain had gotten to be too much and he had retreated to the polite, humble distancing of the rurouni.

Constant traveling probably helped keep him from forming strong emotional attachments to people and places, though it obviously hadn't kept others from forming strong attachments to him. Kaoru couldn't blame them. _Heaven knows I was attached to him from the start. If only he might have become as attached to me. Then again, he has been living at my house for over a year after ten years of constant wandering, so I have to mean something to him._

_Or maybe the house and laundry do it for him, you twit. You aren't thinking about this anymore, remember?_

The clouds had gotten lower and darker while she was practicing, though they still didn't seem stormy enough to do her any good. Before she could move to go get that drink, her feathered distraction bobbed his fluffy head and flew off. Smiling, she turned a speculative gaze upon the now abandoned pine tree.

"What about you, handsome, would you like a private lesson?"

Kaoru had to laugh at her silliness. _Right, so go do whatever it was you were going to do before you heard that growl._ At this thought, Kaoru remembered a very basic fact that had escaped her up until now: birds can't growl. So where had that sound come from?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dictionary:
> 
> Hakama- The skirt-like pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear. It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them.
> 
> Dake- Only, just
> 
> Hitokiri- assassin
> 
> Busu- ugly woman (very rude), what Yahiko calls Kaoru
> 
> Aku Soku Zan- Sin Swift Slay or Kill Evil Instantly, Saitou's motto
> 
> Rurouni- Wanderer
> 
> Deshi- pupil, disciple, adherent, follower, apprentice
> 
> Ohagi- a rice cake covered with azuki (red bean) paste, soybean flour or ground sesame. It can be made in many different colors and shapes depending on the season or festival.


	3. Bare-chested and Sweating Above Her

_Earlier that day_

Plucking a splinter from his sweat-slick thumb with his teeth, Kenshin glared down at the roof he was currently trying to fix. This day just kept getting better and better. Maybe next he'd get lucky and a mob of kids would start pelting him with rotten melons. Luckily Sano was there to help, or else he would have even longer to look forward to this torture.

Sano had proved to be surprisingly competent when it came to roof fixing. If not for the splinters and scorching sun, Kenshin might have enjoyed the satisfaction of working with his hands and the genial company. Megumi-dono had also been very solicitous, keeping them liberally supplied with drinks and snacks during the long hours of work.

Both Sano and he had expected it to be a quick repair job before the worst heat of the day descended like a ton of bricks. Unfortunately, once they climbed up Dr. Genzai's rickety ladder to the roof, they had realized that the entire section containing the hole was on the point of collapse and, from the rank smell of certain areas, rotting.

"They're lucky we work for cheap," Sano had laconically pointed out as he tightened his red headband in preparation for the sweaty labor ahead. Picking up a box of tools, they began stripping off the pieces that couldn't be repaired.

Megumi came out about an hour later in her medicinal smock to check on their progress and bring them some drinks, "Whew, it sure got hot quick. Well, how goes it Ken-san?"

Before he could answer, Sano broke in, "We've about finished what you paid us for."

"What do you mean by that Sagara? You're doing this for free," Megumi retorted with narrowed eyes.

"Which is why before we go any further, we need to renegotiate wages. Otherwise this roof might have to stay broken for a while," he cockily replied.

"Now Sano," Kenshin started to placate, but Megumi broke in.

"Oh really? That sounds reasonable," she purred. "Yes, tallying up the costs of all your medical care in the last year that you _still_ haven't paid for, along with food consumed and those nights you needed a cot to sleep on after a drunken binge, I believe that you should be paying _us_ , oh," putting one elegant finger to her pursed ruby lips she paused, "oh yes, several thousand yen in addition to the fixing of this roof."

Sano's audible gulp made the fierce light in Megumi's eyes shine brighter and brought a smirk to her lips.

"Now Megumi-dono," Kenshin tried to break in between their staring contest, "you know Sano doesn't have that kind of money right now."

"Ohohoho, of course the rooster-head doesn't," she paused, "which is why I will content myself with the fixing of my roof… for now." At Sano's glare she laughed. "Feel free to take a _short_ break and have a drink, but I expect you back at work by the time I return." After delivering her parting shot, she sauntered back inside.

Jumping down from the roof, Kenshin gratefully lifted the cup of cool tea and took a refreshing sip, washing away the salty taste of sweat and dust from his lips. Thankfully, Sano hadn't irritated her so much that she'd taken their drinks with her.

"Damn Fox," Sano grumbled, still staring after the departing woman as he grabbed his own drink.

"What, did you expect she'd actually pay us to fix this roof?" Kenshin questioned with mingled exasperation and amusement.

"No, I was just-" Sano sighed and took a deep drink. "Damn Fox, I'll get her one of these days… You don't think she'll really make me repay all that money, do you?" Finishing his tea, Sano clapped Kenshin on the shoulder and climbed back up onto the roof without waiting for his answer. Setting his own empty cup down, Kenshin joined him and started adding wooden nails to the remaining roof sections.

Despite Sano's grumbling, Kenshin doubted he had much to worry about. Despite being a self-professed freeloader with a high tab at almost every restaurant in the city, Sano always managed to find money when he really needed it. He had a quality about him that made people like him, sometimes in spite of themselves, as he suspected was the case with Megumi-dono. She liked him too much to ever call him on his full debt (unless he really _really_ pissed her off). Just how far beyond 'like' those feelings might go, Kenshin had his suspicions, but for now the two of them seemed content with verbal sparring every chance they could get.

Kenshin sometimes wished that his own credit problems were so tangible. His credit, or karma as Aoshi would say, had never been that great. What sins must he have committed in his last life? After all, his earliest memories revolved around the death of his family, and then the kind women who'd tried to take care of him during his slavery. In fact, if living with Hiko as a student was supposed to lead to his personal redemption, he'd ruined that too.

After all of the blood and suffering he'd caused as a hitokiri, he didn't think that even ten years of wandering and atoning had balanced the ledgers. In Kenshin's eyes, he still owed the good spirits. He owed them for the copper tang of blood now staining the lives of so many wives, daughters, and sons. Although he accepted this fact, he had thought at the time and still believed those actions necessary.

For the rebirth of an era, he had paid both his past and his future. No birth, short or long, is ever easy. All are strewn with blood, excrement, and pain. Kenshin had learned all too well that change and rebirth require suffering. Slitting open the purse of his soul to pay for an ephemeral dream, he had never imagined that over a decade later he would yearn for just a little of that coin back. Not much, not enough to undo the good his silent carnage had wrought, but just enough that he might rest easy going to a woman and saying, _though it isn't much, take this good of mine to add to the storehouse of your own and let us use it to build a life together._

But he didn't have that bit of credit. Instead, he had a debt to the gods that would curse any woman foolish enough to take him in marriage. It had cursed his first wife, Tomoe. And it would curse any woman foolish enough, kind enough, generous, beautiful, tempestuous, compelling and blind enough to take him to her heart.

God help him, but he didn't know how much longer he could resist the selfish voice daring him to tempt that curse, to grasp that dream, to do more than just stay with her. Did he in his arrogance think wishing could ameliorate his debt to the gods so easily, or that they were so simply fooled? No, no, his arrogance did not extend to that. It might be less contemptible if it did. Instead, he knew of the darkness that clung to his future and yet was too weak to allow the sun full reign in the lives of those around him.

By staying with her so long, he flaunted his weakness to himself and the gods. He'd skimmed tragedy more than once, almost lost her more than once. Nevertheless, his heart refused to take the warnings as wisdom. His heart wanted to _stay_ – to thrust roots deep and fast into the rich, black soil of her home, to twine sinewy branches around the wooden walls, to extend stems veined with life-bearing sap, to spread jade-hued leaves in broad swaths to protect her tender flesh from the harsh elements. He wanted her to sink down between his cradling roots, curl her supple body against his trunk, and let the swaying susurrations of his branches lull her into a dreamland where sorrows disappeared and only joy dwelt.

For that was what she did for him. To Kenshin, every time he returned to the dojo and saw the weather-beaten kanji sign standing sentinel at the gate, stepped through to the faint, lingering essence of jasmine entwined with the scent of the pines in the courtyard, sensed the emanations of her melodic ki, and heard her happy "Okaeri," he remembered. He remembered that for now his wandering was over and he lived with joy; he lived with _Kaoru_.

Fixing roofs wasn't so bad; it was the blazing sun that made the experience nigh unbearable. Kenshin feared that he might melt through the hole in the roof to permanently stain the clinic floor in a puddle of orange, red, and white. Small children would point in disgust and shriek about blood, but Megumi-dono would calm them down and tell them "not to worry, just the remains of the resident rurouni who melted in that last heat wave, don't you remember? See how the outline and colors form his hair, gi, and hakama? Now mind your mothers when ordered out of the sun," and she'd send them calmly on their way.

At the bizarre turn of his thoughts, Kenshin wondered if he had been working out in the sun too long. Perhaps it was time for another break? Sweat soaked his gi and the folds of his hakama, a testament more to the violent heat than to any strenuous labor. While working, his sweat-spiked bangs dripped intermittently onto his cheeks, hands, and the floor far below.

Sano had only lasted a scarce half-hour after their first tea break before stripping off his jacket and the bandages around his waist. Kenshin was sorely tempted to do the same, but common sense held him back. It wasn't that he felt shy; there were just certain things he knew better than to do, like strip down to just hakama while up on a roof next to a busy street.

Most of the people in town had no idea that Kenshin the rurouni was once known as the Hitokiri Battousai. Many even thought him a bumbler with few skills to speak of. The scars crisscrossing his muscled torso, however, told a different and very bloody story. Many of those scars would raise questions he'd rather not have to answer and bring trouble he'd rather not have to deal with. So he continued working in sweat-soaked misery while Sanosuke labored alongside fractionally cooler in only his white pants.

Wiping the stinging sweat off his forehead with one hand, Kenshin leaned down through the open section of roof and called out a respectful, "Megumi-dono?"

"Coming Ken-san!" her voice replied from deeper within the clinic. A second later she strode into the room below them, still looking down as she wiped her hands clean on a towel.

"Are you two ready for lu–" at this point Megumi finished drying her hands, looked up, and froze.

Observing her unmoving form and stunned face with confusion, Kenshin followed her arrested gaze. It currently rested upon one very oblivious Sagara Sanosuke. A shirtless and sweaty Sano who, after nailing down his final rafter, sat with muscled arms crossed behind his head as he grinned in boyish pride down at his work. Kenshin supposed it was a sight to make any woman pause. Then again, Kaoru might take the opportunity while Sano was distracted to throw something at him and make him lose his balance, he thought with a smile.

"Megumi-dono," Kenshin spoke quietly, trying to break her out of her trance without calling Sano's attention to it. "Megumi-dono."

"Huh," she turned blank eyes and parted lips his way before shaking herself the way a dog sheds water, "Right. Are you two ready for bed- I mean a break? You must be hungry." Smiling weakly, she gestured inside, "Your lunch is all set out in the main room."

At the word lunch, Sano came out of his self-congratulations to heartily agree to a break. Unfortunately, he was too late to see Megumi's former absorption, and she very carefully kept her back turned as she led them inside the clinic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dictionary:
> 
> Hakama- The skirt-like pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear today, and were common male attire in Meiji. It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them.
> 
> Dake- Only
> 
> Hitokiri- assassin
> 
> Busu- ugly woman (very rude), what Yahiko calls Kaoru
> 
> Rurouni- Wanderer
> 
> Deshi- pupil, disciple, adherent, follower, apprentice
> 
> Sensei- teacher
> 
> Okaeri- Welcome home


	4. Don't Regret the Way You Finish It

Inside the clinic, Megumi sat the two of them down at a bench out of the way of rest of the patients. Sano immediately dug into his bowl of cold noodles, but Kenshin paused to survey the room. At the moment it only held two groups of people.

The first group consisted of a mother and her three children. The youngest looked recently born, tiny hand trustingly clutching a sibling's finger as he napped quietly against his mother's breast. No one looked ill or injured, and their ki seemed calm without the darkness that portended pain. He assumed it wasn't an urgent visit, perhaps a follow-up check on how the new babe was dealing with the heat.

The other group seemed to be comprised of three young men, boys almost. One had a bandaged forearm. His two friends kept looking toward the hallway where Megumi had disappeared to. Most likely they waited for some last medicine or advice before taking off.

Cradling the cool blue ceramic bowl containing his lunch, Kenshin took a deep whiff of the salty broth. After swallowing the first bite of cold noodles, he sighed in satisfaction. He enjoyed the occasional break, eating delicious food prepared by someone else.

Poor Kaoru was willing to give him a break with the cooking. Despite good intentions though, her efforts always seemed to meet with disaster at some stage before they reached the table. No, he could call Kaoru's cooking many things, but delicious wasn't one of them. Nevertheless there were other compensations. The slightest compliment on any aspect of her cooking made her normally boisterous smile shy and her sky blue eyes glow. Plus she was getting better at making things taste edible.

Smiling, he took another bite and wondered if she might finish teaching at her friend's dojo late, and be able to join them at the clinic for lunch. He didn't want her to have to eat by herself. She might enjoy a break from eating something cooked by him too.

Over the sound of Sano slurping, Kenshin heard a familiar name spoken by the trio of young men. Cocking his head, he took a sip of the salty broth and started paying attention to their conversation.

"Bet you thought classes being cancelled today would mean no new wounds, ne Nakago?" teased the taller of the two uninjured boys leaning against the wall next to where their bandaged friend sat.

"Very funny, Naomu," the injured Nakago replied, sticking out his tongue.

"If you ask me," the third boy broke in, "we all got more cuts, scrapes, and bruises from trying to dig that well than we would have from a simple lesson. After an hour I was willing to go beg Sensei to beat on me for a while just to escape the digging."

"I wish you had, then maybe I would have gone with you and not cut myself on that damn shovel," Nakago responded.

"Jirou's just sad because he didn't get to have Kamiya-Sensei help him correct his stance today," Naomu threw in, laughing at Jirou's blush.

At Kaoru's name, Kenshin's body tensed. Carefully he set down his bowl.

"When she gets done with you, she's welcome to put her hands on me anytime she likes," Nakago said suggestively. "Have you guys noticed all of those 'private lessons' our Sensei have together? I wouldn't mind some private lessons, up close and personal, with Kamiya myself." Nakago and Naomu laughed together, though Naomu's laugh sounded a bit surprised at Nakago's daring.

Through the roaring in his ears, Kenshin dimly heard a sharp crack. It took him a moment to identify the sound as his chopsticks snapping from the furious clenching of his hands.

Jirou straightened up from his slouch against the wall looking uncomfortable, "Kamiya-Sensei isn't like that. You should be more respectful."

Nakago sighed and rolled his eyes, "I have a lot of respect for Kamiya's," he paused, making the lack of honorific even more obvious the second time, "luscious body and her way with a sword."

"Nakago!" Jirou choked out.

"Besides," he continued undaunted, "she lives alone with two guys she isn't related to, and that street brawler and who knows how many other men always stop by. It's not like she hasn't done or heard it before."

Kenshin, face hidden behind the fall of his scarlet hair, shook from the effort it took to stay seated.

_Don't move. Don't you dare get up, Himura! Don't start, because despite their words they are just stupid kids who take advantage of this peace to say shit like that. Don't start something unless you can guarantee you won't regret the way you finish it. Kaoru won't thank you for cutting up her students, even if they do deserve it and you won't regret it. Control, Himura, control._

Sano had, by this time, finished his noodles with a satisfied belch. Noticing Kenshin's white knuckles clenching a pair of broken chop sticks and the fine tremors shaking his body, Sano's senses went on high alert. Looking around, he quickly focused his attention on the object of Kenshin's rage. He tuned in just in time to hear the linking of his name with Kaoru's.

"Little bastards," Sano hissed, making no effort to keep his voice low as he stood up to his full five foot eight inches of height. At Sano's movement, Kenshin's tightly strung nerves sent him lunging upwards as well.

Expressions of horror dawned on the three's faces as they turned to see an enraged Sano and Kenshin looming across the room.

Glancing at Kenshin from the corner of his eye, Sano saw something there that made him flinch. Reaching over, he squeezed his arm warningly, "I'll take care of this."

Turning back to the trio with a mean look in his eye, Sano advanced menacingly. "Would you like to insult Jou-chan to my face? Or maybe to her face you shit-faced little punks? Take your pick, 'cause either one of us will happily kick your asses," Sano finished in a bass growl, cracking his knuckles.

Blanching, Nakago scrambled to his feet and the three raced out the door, tripping and whimpering apologies as they ran.

Megumi returned with a pouch of herbs just in time to witness their frenzied exit.

"What was all that about?"

Seeing Sano striding off after the fleeing boys while rhythmically clenching and unclenching his fists, her eyes narrowed.

"Sano," her voice accused, "what did you do to my patients?"

Freezing, he took a deep breath and somehow managed to refocus on Megumi. "Nothing, yet…. They were talking shit about Jou-chan."

Megumi's eyes and posture hardened even more, though this time it wasn't directed at Sano. "Guess he doesn't want these herbs for the pain after all." She glanced at Kenshin's rigid form before softly commenting, "Didn't realize you guys were in the room, huh," and then dropping the subject.

"I had a patient who owed me a favor drop off the rest of the roofing supplies you two said you needed, so you should be all set to finish this afternoon." Flinging her hair back over her shoulder she continued with a raised brow, "If, that is, you're done eating?"

Kenshin looked over at the children staring at them wide-eyed from behind the edge of their mother's faded yukata, then down at his still half-full bowl of noodles sitting abandoned in their broth on the bench. He'd lost his appetite. Keeping his head tilted down, he padded noiselessly outside and back up to the roof.

Often he blessed the length of his bangs, long enough that with a well-practiced tilt of his head, he could hide his eyes and the secrets they told. Living with Hiko, never one to comment on personal appearance unless it related to sword work, he had forgotten about his eyes. Forgotten or perhaps never known, perhaps as a child he had looked different. Whatever the case, once he left to join the revolution, the oddity of his eyes and the secrets they told was made clear to Kenshin.

While he had never owned a mirror, Kenshin did possess exceptional hearing. Often whispers told him what personal observation could not: that as his moods changed so too did his eyes. When calm, thoughtful, or sad, his eyes appeared a light purple. Intense emotions, though, such as anger or grief, lust or joy, changed them. When in the grip of those feelings, his eyes were said to turn a bright gold.

He spent most of the revolution with eyes of gold. More than once he'd heard himself described as an amber-eyed demon who bathed in the blood of his victims, staining his hair crimson with crusted blood. Mostly he'd ignored the whispers, but during the dead of night when the air pressed thick with the cloying perfume of night-blooming flowers, sometimes during those nights he'd wonder about changing something he could control. He'd wonder about dying his hair black, or if cutting it all off would be worth the shame if it would stop half of the whispers.

In later years he'd contemplated how assassination work and, he was embarrassed to admit, volatile teenage hormones had combined to almost make him forget the early whispers of violet eyes. It took a few years of wandering, reparation, and maturing before the purple reappeared in his eyes and dominated. Even so, the gold still escaped when his control weakened and his passions flared. At those times, hearing the shocked exclamations brought up memories of a time he worked so hard to forget.

So he kept his bangs long. When he felt too strongly about something, he tried to remember to hide whatever color they betrayed behind a screen of shadow and scarlet strands.

Kaoru had noticed, though. He could tell she had noticed something. How much she knew or suspected, however, he couldn't be entirely sure. Usually her expressive face shifted and shouted her moods clearly, leaving no doubt as to just what she felt about of a person or situation. Every so often, though, she would subtly retreat behind a wall of cheerfulness that, when looked at closely, was only a translucent screen obscuring the shadows cast by her thoughts. Her usual transparency made these times cut more sharply, because unlike other people, he knew Kaoru had to make an effort to hide her thoughts. She had to make an effort to consciously deceive.

Kenshin thought she had noticed his habit of hiding his eyes because she'd offered to cut his hair several times. The last time was only a month ago.

Hesitant footfalls announced her presence on the shaded porch where he sat. She came almost to his side before kneeling down, carefully smoothing the edge of her red and purple flowered kimono under her knees. The movement wafted a subtle fragrance of jasmine across his body. Slowly, like a rabbit poised to retreat back to the bushes if startled, one of her small hands reached out. Curious, he kept still. Three fingers gently lifted a lock of his hair, her calluses catching roughly on a few fiery strands.

"It's getting so long," she mused, finger combing the last few inches tentatively. The soft feathering of her fingers on his back loosened tense muscles and drew a soft shuddering sigh from his lips. She continued speaking after a few moments. His eyes felt heavy lidded from the glancing touch of her fingers, "I could trim it for you, along with your bangs. Then we'd both be able to see more clearly." Her gentle voice of teasing failed to completely cover the serious undertone.

_Wha-, what does she mean by that?_ Languor evaporating, he tensed, unable to control the flash of confused apprehension her words caused. She must have felt the muscles stiffening beneath the brush of her hand. Her fingers stopped their tentative combing and paused in a warm fan along the base of his spine, pinky resting along the top of his hakama.

"This unworthy one would not want to bother you, Kaoru-dono. Do not worry about me. I can see well enough, that I can."

A moment more of silence passed before she removed her small, hot hand and stood up. "All right, Kenshin, if you are sure…."

"Thank you for your concern, Kaoru-dono," he replied, hoping she wasn't hurt or mad.

She sighed, but when he turned to look her face seemed cheerful and serene. He could tell that her screen was up, hiding what she really felt.

"Kaoru-dono…" he didn't know what to say. He only knew he wanted the face she showed him to be real.

Searching the deep blue pools of her eyes, he felt a little lost. For a moment her eyes searched back inscrutably, then she blinked and when those long lashes rose, the screen had disappeared. In the slant of her brow, the tilt of her nose, the quirk of her lips, and the shine of her eyes he could read sadness, concern, and affection.

"Kaoru-dono," he repeated, but now even knowing her mood, he still didn't know what to say. Should he tell her he was sorry? That he didn't think he could take hearing her voice sounding shocked, scared or disgusted? That he was afraid if she caught him staring at her yellow-eyed she might get the wrong idea, or (perhaps worse) get the right idea of where her lush body and pouting lips led his thoughts? Did she want to know that only a thread remained of his control, that only a fragile thread kept him from crushing her curves against his body, thrusting his hand into the silky hair at her nape, and sucking her bottom lip between his teeth?

"It's alright Kenshin." She rose gracefully to her feet. "When you're ready let me know," she said over her shoulder before walking off towards her room.

_Ready to… oh, about the hair._ Following her retreating form with his gaze, it took until she turned the corner to shake himself from his daze. Standing up, Kenshin decided to go and do something that didn't require thinking, like chop more wood for the bath house.

It had happened a month ago, he thought, picking another splinter out of his finger angrily. She had touched his hair and the small of his back so naturally, if tentatively, just a month ago, so he couldn't understand why she barely tolerated him this last week. She didn't act cruel; she still had the kindness and the temper. But the way she treated him was somehow so different.

It probably had something to do with the night they ate fish. On the way home, they had run into a married couple that Kaoru knew. After the conversation she seemed wistful and melancholy. Kenshin had wondered if she was unhappy because she still loved her boyhood crush, Tomoaki, and he was now married. He couldn't see Kaoru trysting with a married man, he just couldn't _see_ it. But she was definitely unhappy about something.

Then at home, Yahiko had chortled something about Kaoru mistaking the fish for a present. She had laughed about the mistake herself, but something rang false in her expression and voice.

Kaoru gave so much of herself, yet she received so little in return. He should have gotten her something. It had been a long time since he had gotten her anything. He didn't want to send the wrong message, yet since he didn't know what he wanted the right message to be, he ended up not giving her anything at all.

Now though, he was scared that his lack of action might have doomed him. What if he lost her? Lost her because she didn't realize how much he appreciated her, how much she meant to him? What if she left him? He'd always assumed that if they parted, it would be because he left, not her.

He didn't know what exactly had caused it, or why the night of the fish had led to this, only that it had. This last week she went out of her way not to touch or look at him. He could have shaved his head bald and she still wouldn't have noticed his eyes. She never looked up long enough to see them. Something had to change, to go back to the way it was or forward to something else. Just not the way it had been this last week. He couldn't take any more of this.

Frowning down at his empty hands, Kenshin blinked and looked around. Sano sat at the edge of the roof swinging his legs and swigging from a jug. Shaking his head sharply, he looked around again and realized that he hadn't imagined it, the roof really was finished. Cheered slightly, though the problem of Kaoru still churned fretfully in the back of his mind, Kenshin went over next to Sano, took the earthen jug from his raised hand, and downed a mouthful.

"Sano! Oi, Sano!" called a red-faced Yahiko as he raced up to the roof practically gasping for breath. Kenshin felt a surge of worry seeing his urgency, but Sano just grabbed the jug and took another swig.

"How can you run in this heat? And what do you want?" Sano queried lazily from his perch.

"I need you to give me some money."

"Sure, you want to borrow some cash at a good rate?" Sano inquired before finishing the last of the jug and shaking it a bit to make sure it was truly empty.

"No, I mean I need you to give it," Yahiko yelled up with his arms straight and stiff by his sides.

"Now wait a second, Yahiko-chan," Sano choked.

"Don't call me chan!" he screamed, unexpectedly knocking Sano off the roof with a small piece of rotting wood lying next to the clinic wall.

"We don't have a second," Yahiko declared from his place next to Sano's prone body. "He said he'd only guarantee that price for another hour. So you have to come now! Besides, you owe me, remember, for not telling Megumi? Of course I could go talk to her right now," Yahiko threatened with crossed arms.

"No, no, I'm… coming," Sano muttered with a grunt as he levered himself off the ground.

Curious about what secret Yahiko knew, Kenshin chuckled. "While you go see what the fuss is all about, I'll go see how Kaoru-dono is doing back at the dojo."

Hopefully, the walk back alone would give him a chance to clear his head and figure out what to do. If he was really lucky, he'd arrive to find Kaoru calmly practicing in the dojo, wearing a welcoming smile as she looked into his eyes and said, "Okaeri," just like she used to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My beta, Katyclismic, kills me. She decided to suggest a fix to the final line of this chapter. I admit, I'd considered it myself, but in the end decided it wouldn't fit. Did anyone else think it, or are the two of us just weird? Here you go anyways: "If he was really lucky, he'd arrive to find Kaoru calmly practicing in the dojo, wearing a welcoming smile" AND NOTHING ELSE! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!  
> Next chapter, what everyone has been clamoring for – Kenshin arrives home to see ?
> 
> Dictionary:
> 
> Hakama- The skirt-like pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. (Thanks for the clarification from Kathryn Angelle.)
> 
> Dake- Only
> 
> Hitokiri- assassin
> 
> Busu- ugly woman (very rude), what Yahiko calls Kaoru
> 
> Rurouni- Wanderer
> 
> Deshi- pupil, disciple, adherent, follower, apprentice
> 
> Sensei- teacher
> 
> Okaeri(nasai)- Welcome home
> 
> Yukata- Light cotton summer robe, not as heavy/layered as a kimono
> 
> Jou-chan- Little missy, Sano's nickname for Kaoru
> 
> Names:
> 
> 3 students in the clinic
> 
> Jirou- merciful son (defends Kaoru)
> 
> Naomu- esteemed warrior
> 
> Nakago- Middle child (insults Kaoru. Compared to his friends, his name is boring ne, so he talks big to try and make himself feel better, lol.)


	5. Getting Wet

Soft yellow dust coated Kenshin's lips as he walked back to the Kamiya Dojo. His light footfalls and the slight breeze raised clouds of powder from the dry dirt road, tasting bitter on his tongue. It made his mood darker as it clung to the cooling sweat streaking his face and neck. It wasn't like he'd never, in ten years of wandering, experienced walking down a road tasting dust under a fevered sun. Sun, wind, and sleeting snow – he'd traveled through them all. Yet he never remembered them making him so miserable.

_That's because it isn't the weather, it's the way Kaoru is treating you._

For over a year he hadn't been ready or willing to risk having more of her. But after this last week, he knew he couldn't bear having less. Somehow he'd deluded himself into thinking she would never change. That even if she someday had another family (with razor-sharp clarity he could picture Kaoru dreamily cuddling a babe with her same blue eyes, but he'd never been able to see the theoretical husband as more than a hazy shape), life at the dojo would continue on as before. That or he would finally choose to leave in a noble attempt to protect them from his bad karma. He'd never even entertained the idea that she would be the one to voluntarily leave him.

Angrily he flicked muddy sweat off his face. This whole situation drove him crazy. The frustration made him want to provoke her somehow. Provoke some response so that she once again looked at him, into him with that smile that said she saw, understood, and accepted.

Crossing over the bridge, Kenshin looked down into the sluggishly flowing river below. Shimmering above the brown, blue and green of the water, he noticed several ghostly white blurs. Curious, he looked around for their source. _Ah, clouds, perhaps rain clouds… Kaoru will be pleased._

Lips quirking in a faint smile, Kenshin finished crossing the bridge and veered off the road at an angle into the sun dappled forest. Staring at the water had given him an idea. He decided to swing by the river where it curled around near the dojo and rinse off some of the dirt and sweat. Maybe it would help him cool off his temper as well as his body. He needed all of his wits if he was to figure out how to stop Kaoru from distancing herself any further.

He couldn't take too long, though. If Sano and Yahiko returned to the dojo to find him missing, they might say something to worry Kaoru. This might break her out of her detachment, now that he thought about it, but he couldn't make her worry. He'd promised. Besides, she had enough problems without him adding to them.

How many of the people in town talked about Kaoru behind her back because of him? Because she had taken Yahiko and him into her home and, he liked to think, her heart? Unfortunately, today wasn't the first time he'd heard insinuations like that. When it had happened in the past, he'd been able to either quietly threaten or politely finesse the offenders into admitting they were wrong.

But this time had been different. Perhaps he was unbalanced because of Kaoru's cold treatment this last week. Whatever the case, his anger had ignited, hot and fierce. _How dare they insult Kaoru!_ Instead of trying to convince them to respect Kaoru in the future, his body had clamored to do something damaging and permanent in the present. Like showing them that while a shovel could break skin, a sword could cut even better, cut a message into their flesh that they'd never forget.

Such violent rage had startled him, making him afraid to even twitch. He knew what he was capable of under the onus of such a rage. Kenshin feared that if he moved at all, he'd not regain control until he'd done something so awful that he'd have to wander again, away from Kaoru and the family he'd established here.

Luckily for them, Sano had taken that moment to glance over at Kenshin. Sano's slight recoil seemed to indicate he'd realized how precariously Kenshin teetered on the cusp of violence.

In an attempt to regain control, Kenshin had visualized a heavy iron chain wound around his body from chest to knees, keeping him from leaping off into the abyss of rage. On each thick link, he arduously engraved a reason for not exploding into violence and shedding blood.

Link 1. If I move, they will die.  
Link 2. If they die, I would have to leave Kaoru.  
Link 3. Kaoru must be protected.  
Link 4. If I protect Kaoru now, I won't be there to protect her later.  
Link 5. Sano will also protect Kaoru's honor.  
Link 6. Sano knows not to take it too far.  
Link 7. Sano knows how to take it far enough.  
Link 8. I can trust Sano.

At first it helped his control, but soon this logic started to sound less and less convincing, even when Sano stood up angrily to confront them. _What if Sano went easy on them? After all, to Sano, Kaoru was just his Jou-chan, while to Kenshin she was his-_

It was a testament to Sano's courage and trust that he'd squeezed Kenshin's shoulder in both warning and reassurance, promising to take care of the problem. Walking forward, he had purposely blocked Kenshin's view while he confronted the boys, simultaneously threatening and, without their knowledge, protecting them. They had run off, _if only Megumi hadn't come in right then_ , and, while the glint in Sano's eyes screamed that he'd get them later, Kenshin still wasn't sure if he was satisfied with that.

_How dare they insult Kaoru, how dare they! She was HIS-_ expelling all of the air from his lungs slowly, Kenshin tried to calm down. That was his purpose for going to the river after all, to calm down and cool off. He needed to stop thinking about what had happened. Sano _would_ take care of it. Besides, he had other things to worry about, like what to do about Kaoru when he reached the dojo. Kaoru was his landlady, his friend, his sunshine; what he yearned for as he fell asleep and sought when he first awoke.

Reaching the riverside, Kenshin slipped his arms from their sleeves, letting his gi flop down around his waist over the ties of his hakama. Kneeling down on the rock strewn riverbank, he bent over and splashed his chest, arms, and face with water. The cool fluid rinsed away the sweat and grime of the day, along with some of his angry tension. Running wet hands back through his red bangs and over the top of his head, Kenshin closed his eyes and let out a long sigh, exhaling his aggravation and inhaling the scents and sounds of the river and forest.

With his head tipped back, he could feel the stretch of his arched neck muscles and hear the plop of water dripping off his hair and face onto the pebbled bank. Continuing his deep breathing, he dimly registered the feel of his chest rising and falling with each breath. Along his back the faint breeze breathed gently across his skin, cooler in the trails of water tracing down his muscles, shoulder blades and spine.

Delicately Kenshin extended the waves of his ki. No people wandered anywhere near to disturb his communion. About ten meters back he could feel a family of rabbits nibbling on the sweet-smelling summer clover. To his left, a deer stepped delicately to the waters edge, and he pictured her large brown eyes rolling alertly as her nostrils flared, scenting for predators. In the sun-drenched clearing to his right, he could feel the industrious energy of fuzzy black-and-yellow bees buzzing as they collected golden pollen from alabaster lily bells and ocean-blue poppies, whose cerulean centers mimicked the iris of Kaoru's eyes. All around him the forest thrived with the life-force of birds, snakes, foxes, beetles, and raccoons.

Once again centered and calm, Kenshin opened his eyes, stretching fluidly as he stood up to continue his trek. At his movement, a jet-black crow raucously cawed three times before flying up in an explosion of feathers, winging off in the direction of the dojo.

Despite the heat, Kenshin felt a chill race up his spine. His newfound calm evaporated as the old proverb rattled through his mind, _3 crow cries, someone died._

Kenshin knew it was only a saying, just a silly superstition.

Nevertheless, he took off running in the direction of Kaoru and the dojo. In his rush, he didn't even bother to refasten his gi.

Speeding along, now not even noticing the heat, he soon saw the familiar sign with its lovingly inked kanji – Kamiya Kasshin Ryu. The gate looked shut, but that wasn't too unusual. Throwing wide his senses, Kenshin was rewarded when moments later he located Kaoru's familiar energy blazing from inside the dojo and no one else's.

_If you can sense her, she's still alive. She's fine. You simply let your fears get the better of you, you idiot._ When only a few strides from the gate, he slowed down. He couldn't have Kaoru worrying that something was wrong if she saw him run through the gate, especially since she was fine.

_But what if she wasn't?_ Refusing to plunge down into that murky pit of thought, Kenshin took a deep breath and pushed open the gate.

Or, at least he tried to – the gate wouldn't budge. It was locked.

_Why would it be locked? There's no reason for it to be locked. Unless she went back into town?_ But he could still feel the pulse of her ki inside the dojo.

_Something's wrong._ What if this had been their last week together, with Kaoru distancing herself and him not understanding why? Would he regret his lack of action for the rest of his life? Heart squeezing painfully in his chest, Kenshin took a white-knuckled grip on his sakabatou and silently jumped over the gate. Landing in a crouch, he skimmed his eyes over the courtyard, but couldn't find anything unusual. _Except… wait, the shoji on the dojo are closed. The dojo where Kaoru is. She hasn't closed those since this heat wave started, which means that maybe it wasn't Kaoru who closed them._

Stalking around the perimeter of the dojo, careful not to raise any betraying clouds of dust, Kenshin looked for an opening to peer through, a clue to reveal something before he rushed inside. The wind picked up and blew jade-green pine needles into the vermilion strands of his hair, but he barely noticed their pricking. He was too intent on deciphering this mystery. Kaoru's ki didn't feel hurt or damaged, she felt… satisfied? Determined?

Silently padding around the corner, Kenshin felt his pulse speed up as he noticed that the shoji on this side remained open. Step by cautious step, he advanced until he could see the interior of the dojo. Then he stared… and stared some more.

_Kaoru was fine._ Suddenly nerveless fingers dropped from the hilt of his sakabatou. _In fact, she looks very… healthy._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dictionary:
> 
> Hakama- The skirt-like pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. (Thanks for the clarification from Kathryn Angelle.)
> 
> Dake- Only
> 
> Sakabatou- Kenshin's reverse blade sword
> 
> Kamiya Kasshin Ryu- The name of Kaoru's school and style of Kendo
> 
> Hitokiri- assassin
> 
> Busu- ugly woman (very rude), what Yahiko calls Kaoru
> 
> Rurouni- Wanderer
> 
> Sensei- teacher
> 
> Okaeri(nasai)- Welcome home


	6. The Hunt Begins

_Silently padding around the corner, Kenshin felt his pulse speed up as he noticed that the shoji on this side remained open. Step by cautious step, he advanced until he could see the interior of the dojo. Then he stared… and stared some more._

_Kaoru was fine. Suddenly nerveless fingers dropped from the hilt of his sakabatou. In fact, she looks very… healthy._

Mesmerized, Kenshin stared at a bead of sweat as it slid from Kaoru's temple past the shell of her ear and down her cheek, following the equestrian lines of her neck, pausing momentarily in the indent of her throat, before trickling down the slope of her chest, accelerating as it reached the valley between her breasts, only to disappear into the white cloth binding her upper body.

Throat suddenly dry, Kenshin swallowed.

For some reason, Kaoru was practicing kata wearing _only_ her hakama.

_Hakama dake… Buddha, give me strength._

Kenshin was forcibly reminded of the first time he'd seen this dojo, the first night he'd met Kaoru. She had sliced her arm open during a skirmish with the man pretending to be the Hitokiri Battousai. He had insisted she return home to treat her arm, but she'd wanted to continue pursuing her adversary. Of course she'd claimed she felt fine, _stubborn from the start,_ but a firm tug on her hair made her pass out.

Back at her dojo, Hiruma Kihe (his betrayal still undiscovered) had helped to wrap the wound. Kaoru had nonchalantly shrugged her gi off of one shoulder to provide access to the cut on her arm.

Kenshin remembered studying the wooden plaques with their precisely inked names hung on the dojo wall in a desperate effort to distract himself from the creamy shoulders and enticingly shadowed cleavage her treatment exposed.

At the time he hadn't been sure whether to bless or curse the fact that her partially open gi still managed to cover everything but one shoulder of sakura-like skin. Now he knew.

_Bless, definitely bless._

If he had known just how her waist flared into her hips, about the existence of those two dimples low on her back bracketing the line of her spine, how her navel formed a perfect oval, if he had known, he never would've been able to keep himself under control for so long.

If he was smart, he'd turn around and leave right now. Unfortunately, Kenshin didn't consider himself very smart.

However, he did consider himself a gentleman. A gentleman wouldn't watch her lithe body twisting through the steps of her kata. A gentleman would avert his eyes, turn around, and leave silently, never letting her know he had even been there.

Nevertheless, no matter how much he silently struggled, his legs refused to move and his eyes refused to even blink, much less turn away.

Kenshin didn't watch Kaoru practice very often. He didn't watch because he didn't trust himself to only watch. Kenshin knew his weaknesses very well, and seeing the fiery passion and intense concentration Kaoru displayed doing kata frayed his resolution to not touch, to not curl around the heat of her fire.

Early on he'd made the mistake of thinking that he was strong enough, that he was underestimating himself when it came to watching this little shihandai. It only took only one session to prove that he'd grossly underestimated Kaoru's appeal and overestimated his own stoicism.

Seeing the intensity of Kaoru's red flushed face as she panted through particularly difficult movements, seeing the swirl of her blue hakama, a traditionally male garment, made him dig his nails into the wooden floorboards to keep from jumping up and grabbing her. He had to bite his tongue to silence the groan struggling to burst free.

His imagination took her red, panting face and thrust it hard and deep into his most secret fantasies, imposing those moist pink lips above him, below him, around his body, puffing hot, moist trails down his hypersensitive chest.

Further compounding its treachery, his mind morphed her blue hakama into the same hakama he used to wear back during the Bakumatsu. Something primitive inside wanted to see her wearing his hakama, wanted other men to see her wearing his hakama.

More than once when doing the laundry and noticing the threadbare state of her clothes, he had to repress the urge to use their worn state as an excuse to give her his own white hakama to wear instead. Of course, he knew Kaoru would never accept it. She knew he only had one other set of clothes. Her caring nature would forbid her from taking them.

Besides which, to be perfectly honest, his hakama were more tattered than her own.

How it had happened so quickly and overwhelmingly, this possessiveness and lust, he didn't know. He only knew that he must shield her from it. She knew he cared, but he refused to expose her to more intensity than that.

So he avoided watching her do kata. In fact, he could successfully count the few times he'd seen her do kata on his fingers. Seared into his memory, he could recite a blow-by-blow description of her face and form every second he'd watched her practice.

She might suspect he was hiding something, as she could be disturbingly perceptive, but he would have noticed if she really knew. Her face almost always gave her away.

For over a year, he'd managed to hold onto his control, largely in part by avoiding her when she practiced in her hakama _and_ gi.

Staring at her now, scantily clad in only her breast bindings and hakama, not even wearing her tabi, he felt his control shatter into a million sharp pieces.

And he didn't care.

Devouring her with his eyes, Kenshin marveled at how much a single garment could hide. Without her gi on, she revealed a swath of enchanting milky-white skin, both above and below the dark blue ties securing her hakama at her waist. Considering how deliciously low the hakama rode on her hips, she'd probably pulled the gi out somehow without untying the hakama first.

He wondered why she'd been in such a hurry to get it off.

_What if a lover had pulled it off?_

White-hot fury exploded in his veins. He had to swallow an enraged howl.

Kaoru was young and beautiful; it wasn't unreasonable to think that she might have a man courting her. Kenshin hadn't noticed anyone, and he kept a close eye on Kaoru, but it was possible he had missed someone.

_So where is he now?_

Jumping up and concealing himself in the branches of the pine to the left of the dojo, Kenshin searched again for the touch of another ki. In his previous perusal of the grounds, Kenshin hadn't noticed any signs of another person. All he'd seen were Kaoru's familiar footprints, as if she had paced between the dojo and gate several times. She might have rendezvoused with someone outside the dojo, but she never would've walked back down the road half-naked. Kaoru had more class and, before this moment he would have sworn, modesty than that.

Narrow-eyed, he perused the dojo until he discovered her sweat-soaked, rumpled gi flung against one wall.

_Why did she throw her gi against the wall?_

Wrenching his eyes from the enticing view inside the dojo, now clearer from his perch, he examined the ground around the dojo again. He still didn't notice anything out of place on the sun-scorched earth. A gust of rain-scented wind swirled by, fluttering the sleeves of his gi where they still hung down around his waist. The cool breeze raised the golden hair on his bare arms, and brushed prickling pine boughs against the skin of his arms and back.

Suddenly, it clicked. The locked gate, the closed shoji, they all made sense. _Idiot, you shrugged your gi off to cool down by the river. Kaoru probably got sick of this heat and, thinking herself all alone, decided to take her gi off too._

Mystery solved, a much calmer Kenshin returned his attention to the dojo.

Oblivious to his presence or ruminations, Kaoru lunged into a sword thrust, bending her knees and drawing his attention to one creamy thigh exposed through the side-slits of her hakama.

Sweat beaded on his forehead, and his new-found calm evaporated like a puff of superheated steam. Staring at her silky skin, he burned to explore that crease where thigh met hip with his fingers, or tongue, or fingers and tongue. As she straightened, he mournfully watched the crease disappear, but was soon distracted by other delightful discoveries.

Pivoting slowly on her toes, she brought the bokken down in a controlled chop, then a horizontal slash, presenting her back to Kenshin as she completed the turn. Each precise movement created a hypnotizing ripple underneath her glistening skin as muscles shifted and bunched in patterns across her arms, shoulders, stomach, and back.

His observation of the clean lines of her muscles was interrupted by the bandages circling her chest. Though damp and clinging, they still interrupted his memorization of the subtle gradation of curves tracing down from her shoulders to those dimples peaking over the edge of her hakama. Kenshin's fingers itched to rip the bandages off and burn them, so they'd never veil the beauty of her body from his eyes again.

Kaoru paused for a few moments, her face in profile. He regretfully assumed she'd finished her kata. Without the enticing movements of her body to distract him, Kenshin was able to focus more on her face. Kaoru had the swanlike neck of a geisha or dancer, rising from rounded shoulders more muscled than those usually found on a woman. The contrast fascinated him, creating an urge to map those differences in detail.

A stubborn chin formed the base of her face and character. As he watched, she sucked her lower lip between her teeth. Once released, it glistened like a dew-drenched young cherry. What little air he'd managed to take in whooshed out, and his lower gut clenched. A bead of moisture lingered on her full bottom lip, and it took all of his willpower and strength to keep from darting down to suck it clean with his own lips and tongue.

_Would it taste like cherry?_

Licking his own dry lips, Kenshin knew he'd never be able to eat sakura mochi again without seeing her lips, the pink of young cherries, in his mind.

Above those tempting lips perched a pert nose, given to wrinkling when she felt amusement or disgust. Of course with Kaoru, amusement was always more prevalent. She had a surprisingly strong tolerance for almost anything. While her anger could and often did flare up, it quickly burned out.

That was another reason her behavior worried Kenshin so much. He'd never seen her hold onto a grudge more than a few days, much less a week. Something had to be seriously wrong for her to avoid him for so long, and with his little shihandai half-naked inside a locked gate, he intended to get some answers.

Raising her bokken above her head, Kaoru's face tilted slightly, causing her bangs to fall back and reveal the long sweep of midnight eyelashes hiding her gaze. _She isn't finished after_ _all_. Pleased, he stared at her eyelids, willing them to lift. As if in response to his plea, she opened her eyes and turned towards him to begin a repetition of her previous kata. For a moment he willed her to see him, but those large liquid eyes remained focused down and inwards. Sighing, he realized that even if she looked directly at his hiding place, the contrast of bright courtyard to dim dojo would likely blind her to his form.

From that first night when she'd confronted him on the street, he'd been captivated by her eyes. Like the ocean, they shifted colors depending on her emotional weather. Unlike his own radical shifts from lilac to gold, one had to watch carefully to note the subtle permutations in her irises.

When enraged, her eyes would turn the solid blue-black of dusk after the sun has set but before the stars appear. Yahiko was probably too busy running away from her wrath to notice that dark gleam under her lowered brows, but Kenshin had marked the fascinating change.

Happily bustling about the dojo in the mornings, her eyes appeared the blue of good pottery glaze edged with a ribbon of indigo.

When serious, petals of powder blue seemed to extend from her pupil, falling just short of the cerulean band circling her iris.

On those days when she couldn't hide her sadness, her eyes turned the blue-gray of storm-tossed waves streaked with azure lightning.

As Kaoru moved quickly into her first attack she took a deep breath, giving a small glimpse of the dark cavern inside her mouth and a hint of ivory teeth. The deep inhalation also caused Kaoru's breasts to rise up and strain against their binding fabric.

Clutching the cloth of his hakama hard enough to strain the seams, Kenshin wondered, _what color would her eyes be in the grip of arousal?_

Maybe, if he was lucky, he'd find out today.

As Kaoru leaped up to deliver a downward slash, her long midnight hair coiled and whipped like a hissing serpent around her body. The sweat-soaked strands framing her face and neck flickered like small jet tongues.

In fact, he intended to find out today.

When Kaoru landed and twirled to attack an imaginary adversary on her left, her breasts bounced within their restraints. Aroused beyond bearing, Kenshin shifted his weight again and cursed the cloth concealing those globes.

_If she was going to take her gi off, why couldn't she take the damn bandages off too?_

Kenshin acknowledged that he might be selfish, wanting to see every freckle and scar sprinkling the cream of her skin like exotic spices. But he no longer had the control to bottle up his hunger for everything that comprised Kamiya Kaoru.

A week of suffering from her aloofness had forced him to consciously admit that she had become a need, as necessary as breathing to his life. Hopefully, the gods would understand his plight and grant him mercy. He refused to believe that it was too late to recapture her affection.

To this purpose he gave himself permission to provoke her. Once decided, he felt free to solve the many puzzles she embodied. And just what that body looked like under gi and hakama had consumed his thoughts on many a humid, moonless night.

If she'd let him, he'd study every centimeter of her body with the fervency and dedication he'd once used to master Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu. It had taken him years to master the sword; he was prepared to spend a like amount of time on Kaoru's body.

Over the roar in his ears, Kenshin could hear the susurrations of her bare feet sliding across the wooden planks and the soft panting of her breath. With a final fleet spring, bounce, and fierce slash, Kaoru ended her kata.

After bowing to the principles, she gracefully walked over to put away her bokken. Kenshin noticed the roll of her hips in a way he never had before. Perhaps his fascination stemmed from the glimpses of pale skin on either side waxing and waning like the moon with the sway of her hips.

Returning to the center of the dojo, cheeks slightly pink from her exertions, Kaoru sighed in satisfaction. Then she stretched.

Though to Kenshin's mind, calling it a simple stretch was like labeling Shikibu Murasaki a servant with a diary, or saying Misao "liked" Aoshi.

Raising her lightly muscled arms, Kaoru tipped her head back, exposing the column of her throat, and rose up onto her tiptoes. The sight of her pink toes and trim ankles tightened something deep inside his chest.

Then she arched her back, thrusting her chest into the air, and grabbed the wrist of her left arm with her right hand. Sighing, she closed her eyes dreamily and rested the side of her face against her right arm.

As she stretched even further, her hakama slowly slid down the curve of her hips. Kenshin felt erotic jolts race through his body; he wondered if he'd ever breathe again. Not daring to blink for fear he'd miss it, he focused on that precariously shifting fabric. At the last second, it paused in its descent. With a sexy mewl, Kaoru returned to her feet, hakama only just managing to stay seated on her hips.

Pushed past the point of endurance, Kenshin felt a feral growl escape his lips.

Kaoru jumped in surprise. She must have heard, because she turned to look out towards the yard where he watched. Keenly he anticipated her blue eyes meeting his own, tired of waiting.

Kaoru glanced first to the right, then at the tree he perched in on the left, before jerking her eyes back to the right and stiffening in surprise. Seeing her focus in the opposite direction, Kenshin felt a bit surprised himself.

_Does she see someone else?_ But there was no one else. He'd checked.

Suddenly, the tense set of her shoulders relaxed as she sauntered to the right edge of the porch and leaned out with an inviting, flirtatious smile. Opening those cherry-pink lips, she huskily asked, "Are you here for your private lesson? I've been waiting."

_Waiting for WHOM? He's a dead man._

Leaning forward menacingly, Kenshin followed the direction of her gaze to identify his victim. And there he was, sitting cockily on his pine branch – a small, nut brown sparrow.

Kenshin had heard the phrase 'driven insane by lust' before, but he'd never taken it literally. Now, he feared it might be happening to him. Especially since he still felt like killing the object of Kaoru's husky tone, even if it was only a sparrow. It was ridiculous to feel happy that his non-killing vow, which had momentarily slipped his mind, only applied to humans. If he didn't touch her right now, he feared this insanity might be permanent.

Dark clouds rolled heavy and low over the dojo, and the air, redolent of rain, felt charged with electricity. The menacing sky matched Kenshin's quixotic mood perfectly.

Seeming to sense his hostile intent, the bird cast a wary yellow eye towards his tense form. Proving itself one of the more intelligent of its species, the sparrow launched from its perch and flew off in the opposite direction.

Keeping her saucy smile, Kaoru turned her gaze from the sparrow's flight back to the wrong jade-needled pine tree and placed a hand on her cocked hip. "What about you, handsome, would you like a private lesson?" Chuckling to herself, she straightened up and turned to walk back inside the dojo.

_Oh no you don't, you won't escape me now._

_No more holding back._

With this thought firmly in mind, Kenshin leapt down silently like a panther behind her turned back and spoke up softly, so as not to startle her. Or panic her into running away before he could get his hands on her.

Kaoru was being hunted; she just didn't know it yet.

"I'd love one."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dictionary:
> 
> Hakama- The skirt-like pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. (Thanks for the clarification from Kathryn Angelle.)
> 
> Dake- Only
> 
> Sakura- Cherry blossoms, which are white or very pale pink
> 
> Shihandai- Assistant instructor, Kaoru's title
> 
> Bokken- wooden sword
> 
> Bakumatsu- The revolution Kenshin fought in to overthrow the Bakufu government of the Shogun and start the Meiji era.
> 
> Kata- A standardized set of moves that make up a martial arts form.
> 
> Tabi- Japanese socks with a split toe for wearing sandals.
> 
> Sakura Mochi- pink cherry flavored mochi (pounded rice cake) wrapped in a pickled cherry leaf (So yummy)
> 
> Shikibu Murasaki- (976 - 1031) Also written Murasaki Shikibu, she was an attendant to the Heian Empress and the writer of The Tale of Genji, the world's first psychological novel and one of the longest and most distinguished masterpieces of Japanese literature.
> 
> Sakabatou- Kenshin's reverse blade sword
> 
> Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu- Kenshin's sword style
> 
> Kamiya Kasshin Ryu- The name of Kaoru's school and style of Kendo
> 
> Hitokiri- assassin


	7. Just a Fantasy

_Smiling, she turned a speculative gaze upon the now abandoned pine tree._

" _What about you, handsome, would you like a private lesson?"_

_Kaoru had to laugh at her silliness. Right, so go do whatever it was you were going to do before you heard that growl. At this thought, Kaoru remembered a very basic fact that had escaped her up until now: birds can't growl. So where had that sound come from?_

Remembering the massing thunderclouds behind her sparrow, Kaoru concluded that the sound must have been a herald of the storm to come. Scanning the sky, she could see that the dojo was now covered by a slow moving froth of black and grey clouds. On the edges of the horizon, random fields of blue sky stood out boldly like stepping stones in a white foamed river of wind tossed clouds. The sun, a golden koi, shimmered and leaped over those stones and through that cloud-formed spray. Taking a deep breath, she inhaled the earthy perfume of the coming storm. Pleased by the scent of rain, Kaoru turned to go back inside the dojo and clean up. But before she had taken more than a single step, she heard a masculine voice respond to her teasing question.

"I'd love one."

_Birds can't talk, and neither can clouds._

Kaoru felt icy panic as she recognized _his_ voice. As she flipped around to look at Kenshin, _what is he doing here?_ her mind whirled frantically. Her initial panic and embarrassment quickly disappeared under the more useful combination of anger and cunning.

_If I knock him on the head hard enough, he'll forget he ever saw me half-naked. While I'm at it, I'll hit him so hard he'll forget all about seeing Megumi today too. Hopefully, he'll still remember who he is when he wakes up._

Usually she felt confident that her fist alone could do the job, but with someone as hardheaded as Kenshin, a bokken couldn't hurt... or an iron skillet. Method of violence decided, Kaoru broke out of her quick scheming as she finished her turn. _If I'm quick, he won't know what hit him._ Bracing herself for action, she took a long look at her potential victim.

Kenshin, all red, gold, and white, stood silhouetted against the ash gray sky like a pillar of flickering flame. The red hair she'd so recently fantasized about looked disheveled, alternately gilded and shadowed as wind-tossed clouds tumbled over the sun. Pale green pine needles were intertwined within the copper and garnet strands. As the sun disappeared behind another cloud, the courtyard darkened. Wind whipped the hair back from his strong cheekbones, exposing his forehead and the arch of red-brown brows over…

_His eyes! I should have realized from the sound of his voice, his eyes are GOLD!_

Jolted, Kaoru gasped. She felt like she'd been struck by a bolt of lightning from the seething clouds above. Staring into those blazing amber orbs, she supposed half-hysterically that she now knew where the sun had disappeared to. The way his eyes burned brightly into her own made her feel like she'd been branded.

Ripping her eyes from the intensity of his gaze, Kaoru looked down. She needed to find something familiar to look at, like the top of his magenta gi.

_Except Kenshin- Battousai- the redheaded man in her courtyard wasn't wearing it!_

Breathing shallowly, Kaoru's eyes darted between his bare chest and the weapons inside the shadowed dojo. Did she have anything hard enough to make both of them forget what they'd just seen?

What was he doing here anyway, alone and undressed like that? He should be either still in town helping Megumi, or else in company with Sano. But she'd know if Sano was here, because he'd be making rude and probably salacious comments right now. This made no sense! Kaoru would almost swear that this wasn't Kenshin at all.

As Battousai's lips curved into a sexy smirk, Kaoru had an epiphany. First, she decided that his moist lower lip was definitely the most perfect lip she'd ever seen. This being an important discovery, she had to think about it for quite a while. As soon as her mind allowed her to move on, she had her second big realization. She knew what was going on.

_Of course, I'm fantasizing again._

_You are another bird, just a bird… why aren't you changing into a bird?_ Nibbling on her lower lip she hesitated, _could it really be Kenshin?_ Avoiding the intensity of his eyes, she examined the man standing across from her more closely, and not just his chest and lips.

_No._ No, this was definitely her imagination. No way would Kenshin be amber eyed, bare-chested, and flirting with her. She needed to be practical and not let her desire do the thinking.

The real Kenshin would have knocked at the gate, used a gentle voice full of humble honorifics, and probably be sputtering "oro" right about now. Or more likely he'd blandly inquire about when she'd like dinner. Then he would ask if she wasn't cold, dressed like that, and would she like a blanket or a hot bath? That or offer to make her some cold tea to cool her down while she found her clothes.

Thank goodness it was only a fantasy. She didn't need his lack of attraction shoved in her face today. Obviously, her weary mind had rebelled from going more than an hour without thinking about its favorite obsession.

In this fantasy, both of them were practically topless. Unlike her though, his gi was still tucked in and hung down around his trim waist. Deep down she knew that there were times that she didn't feel good enough for him. Since they both looked the same now, this fantasy must be about wanting to feel equal. _Right?_

_Oh, who was she kidding!_

This was a fantasy based on lust, pure and simple. After all, her chest certainly wasn't equal to _that_ , all full of planes and dips and the outline of so many different intriguing muscles that she'd never noticed before on _her_ body, and would he mind if she explored just a bit?

With his gi shrugged off, she could clearly see the play of defined muscles in his forearms, biceps, and shoulders. Rivers of blue veins flowed along the surface of his body. Moving down his chest, she found herself fascinated by the contrast between the dusky rose of his nipples and the pale gold of his skin. Her gaze slid over his washboard abdomen to catch the faint trail of red-gold hair descending in a line until it disappeared under the fabric of his bunched hakama and gi. The path her eyes followed led her to focus on his very sexy bellybutton, reminding her of an earlier fantasy.

Feeling mischievous, she sought out other hollows: the shadowed indents along his clavicles, the triangle at the base of his throat, and the well of his inner elbows. Kaoru wondered how much tea she could drink if she filled every dip and hollow on his body. Enough to never thirst again? Or would she come away thirsting forever?

Realizing how far her thoughts had gone, Kaoru reigned herself in. That bird in the pine tree must have really sparked her imagination. Too bad there wasn't much meat on a sparrow, or else she'd be tempted to feed everyone sparrow soup until she could trust her wayward imagination to restrain itself. She had to stop fantasizing about Kenshin, or else she'd never be able to move on with her life.

Disgusted with herself, she sighed and firmly lectured her mind. _I'm not doing this anymore, so stop torturing me with these fantasies. Just stop it._ Shooing away the steamy Battousai her mind had plunked into her storm darkened courtyard, she resolutely turned away and marched back into the dojo.

* * *

Kenshin had been prepared for a variety of reactions from Kaoru. This, however, had not been one of them.

One moment, he was watching the sunrise of her blush rising up from the top of her breasts to flush her cheeks. It was so adorable - adorable and enticing. She'd been staring at him, running her eyes down his body, and then she'd licked her lips. Aroused, he'd taken that as a very promising sign.

Then suddenly, she shook herself, sighed, and shooed him off like a wayward child! Giving him her back, she'd walked away. Staggered, Kenshin could only gape at her retreating form and defiantly swinging hair.

He had been taking her for granted, thinking he had her all figured out. Arrogantly, he'd assumed that after a year he knew all of her quirks. The many times she'd surprised him, reacting in unexpected ways, he'd somehow managed to forget.

Look how she'd reacted to his identity as the Hitokiri Battousai. Most women, most people wanted nothing to do with him once they learned his identity. They hated him, feared him, or wanted to use him. But none of them wanted to be close to him. None of them accepted him, asking nothing in return but his presence. No one until Kaoru.

As Kenshin decided how to react to her dismissive behavior, he realized that more important than tasting her lush lips, he had to have her acceptance back. In the past, he could grasp her regard like a cord of promise. It was like she saw him as clean and mended, instead of the stained and torn man he really was. Looking through her eyes, he could see his efforts making a difference. Somehow, she had become his hope.

When his will faltered on moonless nights, and the raging demons of his past beset his mind, he'd pad quietly into her room and tuck himself small and silent into a corner. Counting her every breath by the rise and fall of her chest, he would feel the waves in his mind quiet to ripples, and eventually calm.

She never woke to find his presence. He made sure of that. Nevertheless, on those mornings only, she behaved differently. Without drinking, she would cradle her steaming teacup to her face, moisture collected on the rim like foggy dew, and her eyes would unveil in a look of wisdom far beyond her years. A gentle smile usually graced her lips, and he could clearly read a promise in those ocean deep eyes. They promised him that one day he would find peace, that he would once again feel complete. And despite the guilt and sorrow tangling thorough his soul, he believed her.

This last week of suffering through her distant behavior had been hell. Her kindness and generosity were still there. But for some reason she had shut the windows into her soul. He felt like a plant denied the sun, becoming brittle and unstable. He couldn't even trust himself to take care of a few insulting boys. The quiet looks that challenged him to strive harder, that acknowledged even his weakest efforts proudly, that filled his heart with so much joy it sometimes physically ached, had vanished. For a week, he had barely caught a glimpse of the blue eyes he loved so much.

Until today. Yes, she had turned and walked away from him. But before that, their eyes had met in an elemental clash that had resonated through both his body and, he suspected from the gasp she'd made, hers.

If she thought he'd give up so easily, she hadn't looked at more than the surface of the hitokiri rumors. Beyond the tales of his violence, they also told of his tireless pursuit of a goal and his implacable resolve once focused on a target. Somewhere along the way, this little Shihandai had become his target. He would get back her regard. And unless she insisted otherwise, he would have a taste of those dew-kissed lips and the smooth skin just below the shell of her ear.

Right now, he was going to pounce.

Slipping off his sandals, Kenshin moved like a ghost into the shadowed dojo.

* * *

Any minute now the storm would break. When that happened, her friends would come back, including the real Kenshin. She needed to look decent, meaning dressed, when that happened. Picking up the water jug from its position against the wall, Kaoru felt a huge boom of thunder shake the dojo. Not bothering with the ladle, she took a mouthful directly from the lip of the jar.

As she swung around, a bright bolt of lightning lit up the dojo for an instant. One second she was alone, then the flash of light ended and her fantasy Kenshin was standing inside the open shoji.

"I thought I told you to go away," Kaoru huffed in grumpy surprise. Well, at least her fantasy had some manners; he'd remembered to take his dirty sandals off before entering the dojo. Not that a fantasy could track dirt inside, but it was the principle of the thing.

With the start of the storm, the dojo had become a dark and shadowy place. Nevertheless, she had enough light to see the faint frown creasing his brow and the clouding of those golden eyes. _Great, I've sunk so low that I'm hurting my own fantasy's feelings now._

"Look," she began in an attempt to reason with this manifestation of her desire, but another crash of thunder drowned out her words.

Firming his lips, he advanced towards her step by soundless step, and in the silence she realized that the thunder had stopped. Not that thunder should make it impossible to talk to the fantasy inside her mind, but she wasn't underestimating her stubborn imagination's ability to ignore her. Placing the water jar back on the floor, she placed one hand on her hip and decided to take more direct approach. "I can't fantasize about you anymore."

There, she'd said it out loud. Now maybe her mind would behave. Instead, her fantasy looked a bit puzzled, which made no sense to her. He was inside her mind, why should he be confused by what she said when he knew her thoughts? When he was her thoughts? She was the confused one.

Taking a step back, she was starting to get an uneasy feeling. This was the most realistic fantasy she'd ever had, not to mention the most complex. Usually she only imagined flashes of body here and there: his fathomless eyes, strong hands, firm chest, or soft auburn hair. This time, though, she was clearly seeing his whole body, even parts she'd never even known she'd noticed before. She could only think with burgeoning panic that something was definitely wrong here.

His puzzled look was soon extinguished when understanding dawned in his eyes. A fierce emotion she couldn't name blazed over his face blindingly, and with a flash of white teeth he grinned rakishly. Despite knowing he was only a fantasy, having those amber eyes fixed predatorily on her body was doing queer things to her heartbeat.

"Does that mean I have to stop fantasizing about you too?"

Kaoru felt like she'd been hit in the chest with a bokken. His flirtatious words and dazzling smile knocked her completely off center. Alarm had replaced her smug certainty that she knew what was going on. Taking another step back placed her flush against the sun-warmed wood of the wall. Her golden-eyed shadow matched her withdraw, step for step. He was less than two strides away and she had no space left to retreat.

"Maybe you should turn into someone else," Kaoru suggested nervously. "In fact, yes, I insist you become someone else. You are my fantasy, so become someone unthreatening and available and _dressed_ and- and," distracted by the scent of sandalwood, ginger, and male sweat, Kaoru found herself trapped again in the honeyed gold of his eyes, despite her attempts to avoid his gaze. Swallowing sharply, she finished her sentence breathlessly, "and with brown eyes. You can't have eyes like that, it's not _fair_."

Placing his palm flat on the wall beside her head, he leaned over with his mouth directly next to her ear. Warm, moist breath puffed against the sensitive skin of her neck. Along her body she could feel the caressing heat radiating off of his skin. They weren't touching, but only a sigh separated their bodies. Fantasies couldn't smell enticing. Fantasies didn't feel warm. _Which means that-? Oh no, no..._

"No," he breathed in her ear with a barely audible growl. "There will be no one else. I'm the only one you'll fantasize about," pulling back, he paused with his face a mere finger's length above hers, "because I will make your fantasies come true." Amber eyes darkening, he slowly leaned forward to close the slight space separating their bodies. "And you like my eyes," he declared, surprised satisfaction tinting his voice.

As his hot breath feathered her face, shock finally broke Kaoru out of her paralysis.

_He is real!_

Bringing her hands up, she placed them on the scorching skin of his bare chest and pushed as hard as she could.

Kenshin didn't stagger so much as shift his weight with a smooth expertise that in a different situation Kaoru might have appreciated. However, her hands were now trapped by his own against the firm muscles of his chest, despite her frantic tugging. He'd also positioned his legs so that her knees were unable to get enough leverage to maim him. She'd tried. Kaoru was quite miffed. At least, she would be miffed if she wanted to be polite and understate it.

Since she didn't care much about manners at this point, Kaoru felt it safe to admit that she was enraged. He was trapping her against her will and not letting her get dressed. Anger was good and safe and much better than the squishy embarrassment and curiosity she might be feeling if she let go of her anger to think about the smooth skin burning beneath her fingertips and the chill breeze raising goose bumps on the exposed skin of her torso. Not to mention the effect it was having on his chest, an effect she could feel quite clearly pressing into her calloused palms.

"Where is your gi, my little Shihandai?" Kenshin questioned in a lazy yet predatory tone of voice, as if he had all of the time in the world.

Breathing raggedly, Kaoru felt her anger fast drowning in a swell of desire. Desperately she tried to reignite her rage. "Hypocrite, you're not fully dressed either. Let me go," she insisted, quite heroically in her opinion, as she stared sightlessly at the open shoji over his shoulder.

"No," he responded in an implacable tone of voice. "You've been distancing yourself from me." His thumbs began rubbing small circles on the back of her trapped hands. Each time his thumb completed a rotation, she could feel the slight scrape of his calluses.

"Well, we're not distant now," Kaoru joked, stubbornly resisting both the line of questioning and the maddening caresses. _Now, how do I get out of this… do I want to get out of this?_ She could feel his racing pulse and accelerated breathing underneath her hands, enveloped by his long fingers against the wall of his chest.

Despite the frustration of her situation, she knew that he would never intentionally hurt her. The only way she'd get hurt was if she did it to herself, and even then she knew he'd try his best to protect her from her own clumsiness.

That's how she'd gotten hurt in the first place. She'd pinned all of her hopes for the future on his shoulders, without any indication that he'd ever wanted it. That pain had been self-inflicted, and she'd admitted it. It wasn't his fault. This week, she'd tried to give him what he seemed to want, removing the burden of her expectations.

_So what was this, had she read him wrong? Maybe he'd figured out why she was so unhappy. Did he pity her, was that what this was?_ Anger cleared her mind and allowed her to momentarily think of something besides the man in front of her. Desperately she stared at the capricious wind buffeting the pine boughs in the courtyard. Curling the hands trapped on his chest into fists, she tried to minimize the contact between them. Taking a fortifying breath, Kaoru licked her lips and asked the question burning in her mind, "What do you want?"

From the corner of her eye, she noticed his own tongue flick out to moisten the flesh of that perfect lower lip. It took more strength than she cared to admit, but she kept her eyes locked on the courtyard.

"I want my private lesson," he huskily replied.

When this garnered no response from Kaoru beyond deepening the creases on her forehead, he continued in a more serious voice.

"Look at me." Loosening his grip on her left wrist, he brought it up to rub his chin against the back of her hand like a large cat.

"No," she answered stubbornly. If she didn't look, she could pretend she knew what was going on, and that she had the situation under control.

"I want you to look at me," he commanded. "Kaoru," his voice sounded low and intimate, "I need you to look at me."

The soft, aching need in his voice crumbled her resistance, along with the absence of that formal _dono_ he always insisted on tacking onto her name. Shyly, she lifted her chin until their eyes again met in a soundless fusion. For a split second, she could see past the barriers of experience, strength, and pain in his eyes to a vulnerable young boy. She felt him reaching out for her, calling her name, and how could she do anything but respond to his need?

Shadows again blanketed the secrets in his eyes as the thunder roared, making her realize that part of the clarity in his amber eyes had come from the illuminating spell of the lightning a second before. Without her conscious volition, her thumb had started stroking up and down along the edge of his jaw. Something had changed, was changing, and she didn't know what that meant. She didn't know why this was happening or how long it would last. It scared her. Yet quickly rising above that fear was a feeling of effervescent exhilaration.

The sound of the storm changed, becoming a staccato growl as the clouds finally released their rain onto the parched earth below. Keeping his eyes locked on hers, Kenshin brushed a kiss along the blue veins of her sensitive inner wrist before turning her hand over and rubbing his lips across her knuckles. After a moment, his tongue darted out for a taste of her skin.

Suppressing a moan, Kaoru dug the fingers of her right hand into the flesh of his chest and swayed forward. Nipping her knuckles lightly in retaliation, Kenshin nibbled down her hand until he reached the tips of her fingers. Then he sucked one into the hot cavern of his mouth. Kaoru felt something clenching deep inside her body. This time she couldn't keep a needy whimper from escaping as her eyes partially closed with the sensation.

Releasing her now moist finger from his mouth, Kenshin's own eyes clenched shut as he groaned against her hand, "Yes, again. Teach me another, Shihandai." When he opened his eyes, Kaoru could read their message loud and clear. She may be innocent in the ways of romance, but every woman viscerally recognizes that look of lust and possession in a man's eyes.

He still hadn't touched anything more than her hands, and she already felt like melting into the floor. Tilting her head forward, she felt a sharp jerk.

"St-stop," she managed to gasp out. "Wait, stop."

Body tensing, a shutter fell over Kenshin's eyes. Closed, enigmatic, and mysterious, she could no longer read them. Looking up at her through his long eyelashes, he pressed a searing kiss into the center of her palm. Then he released both of her hands and took a step back.

Kaoru closed the hand he had kissed and pressed it to her rioting heart. At her movement he swayed forward as if to grab her again. "Wait," Kaoru repeated, holding her other hand palm out. "Just- I need- don't-" she was having trouble composing her thoughts into a coherent sentence. She didn't know why Kenshin had never shown her this side of himself before beyond stolen glances, but she did realize one thing. If she hadn't figured it out from his words and actions, the barely leashed desire in his tense form would have told her the truth. _He does find me attractive_. It seemed obvious now, but for a year she'd wondered.

Looking away from her face to focus on the jug by her feet, Kenshin clenched his fists until the knuckles shone white. She thought she heard him breathe, "Fine, it's not that hard to take off again," but that didn't make any sense. Running tense fingers through his hair he told her crisply, "You have one minute to get dressed. Then we are going to talk." Turning around, he presented her with his bare back. As much as she'd like to stare at the way his shoulders tapered down to his waist, she had more important things to do.

Exasperated, Kaoru used her now free hands to extricate the painful lock of hair that had gotten lodged on a splinter in the wall.

Stepping forward, she grabbed his shoulder and spun him around. As soon as his surprised face appeared, she placed her other hand on his bicep and brought their bodies into searing contact, melding the bare skin along their stomachs, chests, and arms. The hand on his shoulder came up to burrow into the hair at the nape of his neck and tugged his face determinedly towards hers.

"Our lesson isn't over yet." she demanded against his mouth as she bridged that final gap, fitting her lips firmly against his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dictionary:
> 
> Hakama- The skirt-like pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. (Thanks for the clarification from Kathryn Angelle.)
> 
> Dake- Only
> 
> Shihandai- Assistant instructor, Kaoru's title per the Japanese manga
> 
> Bokken- wooden sword
> 
> Bakumatsu- The revolution Kenshin fought in to overthrow the Bakufu government of the Shogun and start the Meiji era.
> 
> Sakabatou- Kenshin's reverse blade sword
> 
> Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu- Kenshin's sword style
> 
> Kamiya Kasshin Ryu- The name of Kaoru's school and style of Kendo
> 
> Hitokiri- assassin


	8. Making His Mark

Kenshin could feel himself smiling against Kaoru's barely parted lips. They were moist, slightly chapped, and felt heavenly. The feel of her soft lips and delicately muscled form pressing and rubbing against his heated body made Kenshin decide that from now on he'd welcome any and all surprises she sent his way. If his mouth wasn't much more happily occupied, Kenshin would have laughed out loud in exultation. _Oh yes, she was his now._ She'd had her chance to back out and refuse his advances. Instead _she'd_ seized _him_. She wouldn't get a second chance. Even if her grip on him slackened, his wouldn't. He had her now and he was never letting her go. _Never_.

Bringing his hands firmly around her back, he slid his fingers into those dimples at the base of her spine that had so enticed him. Inserting a knee smoothly between her legs, he tightened his arms, bringing their bodies even closer together. At the intimate press, Kaoru gasped and jerked instinctively backwards. However, the arms he'd wrapped around her held fast and his mouth clung to hers.

It was time for this Shihandai to teach him a lesson. He wanted to know which places on her body would make her writhe and how many different sounds he could coax from her sweet lips. From the way she'd pressed their mouths together, he guessed that she didn't have much, if any, experience with kissing. A small part of him felt disappointed, since it meant he'd have to go slower with her than he wished.

On the other hand, that primitive possessive part of his soul rejoiced, feeling fiercely glad. This feeling and taste would be his alone, his secret. To be the first to lead her step by step down into that spiral of pleasure filled him with violent anticipation.

_Control yourself, Himura, or you'll scare her! Take it slow. Remember, step by step._

Running his tongue along the now parted seam of her lips, he flicked lightly against her teeth. Slowly he drew his hands up her back, pausing occasionally to caress and massage her sakura-soft skin. Bringing his hands around her body, just barely brushing against the outside of her breasts in passing, he smoothed his fingers over her shoulders to curl around her throat like a golden necklace. As he nibbled on her lower lip, he used his thumbs to gently tilt her head until he found the precise angle he wanted.

Kaoru's hand tightened its hold on the hair at the nape of his neck as she opened her mouth wider at his urging. Satisfied, he stroked his tongue teasingly into her mouth. Smothering her next gasp with his lips, he licked along the inside of her teeth. For a moment he would have sworn that his tongue caressed the moist flesh of a cherry instead of the inside of her upper lip.

The hand she'd held tight against his side became loose, sliding down languorously until the tip of one finger came to rest on the sensitive skin just inside the bunched fabric at his waist. Even though he knew it was only a fingertip, it felt like more. That bit of skin slipped beneath his clothing felt magnified, as if both her hands and lips touched him there so intimately.

Growling, he thrust his tongue deeper inside her mouth, devouring the taste of her. She had always smelled of jasmine, but he hadn't known that she tasted of it too: jasmine with a tangy and wild undertone of grapefruit, cherry, and orange blossoms.

Ravaging her mouth, he brought his hands down her back over the rough fabric binding her chest to the petal soft skin along her ribs. His thumbs rested just below the weight of her bound breasts. Barely brushing the cloth edges with a fingernail, he fuzzily wondered how much of his hand could be insinuated underneath it. Would the skin there feel even softer?

Before he could find out, his feisty Kaoru began fencing her tongue with his. He'd never enjoyed a swordfight more. Trying to keep it slow because of her inexperience, he was firmly put in his place by the little Shihandai when she deftly tangled her tongue around his. When she unexpectedly closed her lips around his tongue and sucked, his mind flared blindingly white. For a minute he feared he might explode.

When he came back to his senses, he found himself holding Kaoru tightly up against the dojo wall, forcing her to ride his thigh as he savaged her mouth. Ripping himself away from her swollen lips, he pressed kisses along her rose blushed cheeks and over her long eyelashes. The eyelashes tickled his lips, and he had to return from exploring her temple to repeat the feathered brush. Noticing a drop of water trickling down her far cheek, either sweat or windblown rain, he felt moved to follow the path it traced over the planes and hills of her face and neck with his lips and tongue. After catching the damp bead at the base of her throat, he made sure to run his own eyelashes along the curve of her jaw in a tantalizing caress.

By this time, Kaoru was purring in the back of her throat. Tracing his tongue back down the salty cords of her neck, Kenshin lingered for a moment, savoring the taste of her skin. Intoxicated by the new sensations his mouth was making her feel, Kaoru gasped as he sucked hard on her shoulder and then nipped her sharply. Out of control, her fingers raked down his back as his mouth further marked her body. Soft laps of his tongue soothed the stings as he moved down, until he caressed his lips just above the fabric binding her breasts. Her soft panting teased him, pressing her yielding chest against his famished lips only to quickly jerk it away.

As another whimper escaped out of her throat, Kenshin pulled back just enough to see her. Enthralled, he drank in the sight of her flushed face, eyes closed and head flung back to allow him access to her throat. Shadows kept part of her face shrouded in darkness, as if warning him that although he was starting to know her body, he still had much to learn about the mysterious depths of her soul. The silken waterfall of her hair tickled against the hands he had wrapped around her waist. He could feel the hot pressure of her hands on his back and the sting left by the passionate scrape of her nails.

Through the open shoji to his left, he could hear the torrents of rain pounding down. Thank Kami the wild cacophony wasn't loud enough to drown out the sexy sounds that rose out of Kaoru's mouth as he explored her body. He could feel the reverberations of the cloudburst pelleting the building and flinging raindrops through the open shoji, splattering water along the dojo floor. Luckily the dim, uncertain lighting served to highlight, not hide, the beauty of the woman in his arms.

Lightning flared again, exposing the two red bite marks standing out starkly against her moon pale flesh. His marks, his claim, his woman, _HIS._ Hungrily he gazed at Kaoru, flushed and panting because of him.

Impatient, she writhed against his body and opened her eyes. "Ahh, perfect," he whispered. Aroused, her eyes looked huge: dilated into deep black pools with a thin ring of brilliant sapphire the color of a Blue Butterfly's inner wings, unseen until the moment it lifts its body away from the earth to soar through the cerulean sky.

Unbidden, he suddenly envisioned himself spinning around joyously with Kaoru clutched in his arms, her iridescent blue eyes staring down into his face as she laughed and laughed. Her midnight black hair flew momentarily across her face, and when it fell, he saw that her face and form had transformed. Now it was a little girl laughing in his arms as he swung her around, a little girl with Kaoru's eyes and his nose who pressed small sticky hands to his cheeks and called him father.

This vision too transformed to be replaced by his room at night, illuminated only by the flame of a single red candle. Its light flickered across the bare shoulders of a woman sleeping in his futon. As she turned over he saw Kaoru's face. Her dark blue eyes twinkled in the reflected candlelight like stars on a moonless night. Lifting the edge of her blanket, she quirked one sword-calloused finger at him in a seductive summons.

Returning to himself with a jolt, he opened his suddenly dry mouth to speak, but had to swallow first. Kaoru was staring into his face with her head tilted questioningly. Her hand had come up to cradle his face during his reverie. "Forever," he roughly demanded, "I want this face, those eyes, and your spirit – forever."

"You do?" she questioned in dreamy surprise. "I'm yo-" but then Kaoru tensed slightly. Blinking rapidly, her languor started to disappear. "Wait, why no- this better not be because," her voice sounded deliciously husky, but those weren't the words he wanted or needed to hear from her. He would have her surrender, her agreement. If this was only about lust for her or curiosity about pleasures of the body, then he would satisfy her so well that she would come to crave his touch, just like he had always craved hers. She was so close to loving him already. He knew he could win her heart. No matter what it took.

Recapturing her lips, he muffled any further protests. He needed time to think up a plan. Unfortunately, he feared that strategizing right now might be impossible. When she touched him, his thoughts scattered like petals in the wind. It was a lesson he'd rather learn at a different time, but he was willing to take the bad with the good, and those lips were very good.

* * *

For a brief second, Kaoru felt a moment of despair. She couldn't think when he kissed her like that. It wasn't fair, and she had a feeling that she really wanted to think about this. The things he was doing and saying seemed too good to be true. Why now, and not before? What if this was because of pity? _I will not take pity, no matter how good it feels right now._

Her body rebelled at this thought, contending that it did too matter! The delicious things his lips and hands were doing right now really were the important things, her body insisted. Ignore his motivations, it demanded. _But in the end,_ she managed to argue back, _when he isn't touching me, I'll know and it will break me._ Moving her hands to his shoulders, she tried to push him away. At that moment, he tightened his arms and moved his mouth from her lips to her ear, sucking and nibbling on her earlobe.

Thoughts scattering like broken glass, she could only revel in the sensation. Slowly she brought the sensitive pads of her fingers down to his corded wrists and then back up, tracing the delineations of musculature along the way. She could feel a slight tickling against her palms from the hair on his forearms. As his mouth moved down her neck, she buried her hands in his red hair again. Nuzzling her nose against his temple, she breathed in the scent of sandalwood, ginger, and something indefinably male and Kenshin.

Clenching one fist in the scarlet strands, she felt a prickling in her hand. Another deep breath brought the scent of invigorating pine. Extricating her fingers, she found herself clutching a mass of pine needles that had gotten tangled in his hair.

Focusing past her hand, a task more difficult than it sounded with an amber-eyed man nibbling on her clavicle, Kaoru noticed the silence. The rain had stopped. From behind a cloud the sun peeked out shyly, sending golden rays sparkling through the water still dripping off of the jade green pine boughs and dark brown roof. The combined sun-drops created hundreds of miniature rainbows that winked in and out of sight like mischievous spirits playing in the dojo.

Ethereally beautiful, the magic of the scene made Kaoru suspicious all over again. It looked too beautiful and Kenshin felt too good. She had not come lightly to her decision to give up on her dream of having Kenshin as her husband and lover. It hurt, but she had thought that was what he wanted. However good this felt, she had to know that when he said, "forever," he meant it. It would kill her if he regretted his words tomorrow. The longer she let this continue, the worse it would be if or when it ended.

For a few minutes she hadn't cared about the future, only the now of his sweet lips and sweeter words. She almost couldn't believe that _she_ had grabbed _him_. When she'd finally accepted that he was really there and standing in front of her, she had decided to stop wavering and seize the moment. So she'd seized him. Truthfully, she didn't really have it in herself to regret it. The look of surprise on his face before she'd linked her lips with his would be engraved upon her memory forever. It had felt so good, teaching him that she was a woman with a woman's desires. So what if he knew more about kissing than she did? While she'd felt a bit out of her depth at first, she'd managed to even the score a bit with her tongue work. After all, she was a quick learner.

But she had to make sure that this was what she thought it was. When he'd given her the chance to put her gi on and talk, she probably should have taken it. It had been fun not to, but she couldn't put it off any longer. If she followed her impulses completely, she might end up giving him everything she had, body and soul. And if he left her after that, it would be a mortal wound she'd never recover from.

She had been wrong so many times in the past. Being wrong now was something she could not afford. _Be strong, Kaoru._ Placing her hands against his shoulders again, she found the will to push him away with all of her strength. He didn't go far, but it was just enough space to separate his distracting mouth from her body.

"Kenshin." At the serious sound of his name on her lips, his eyes came up and paused on her face. "Kenshin, I'm confused. I," Kaoru pulled in a lungful of air, "I thought you just wanted to be friends." His hands tightened around her body. "You've always pushed me away." Reading the denial rising in his eyes, she quickly continued. "I know that you let me get closer than the others. I love that you trust me that much. But, but you never seem to want to get any closer to _me_. Whenever I tried, you always pulled back. It seemed to make you unhappy and sad. That's why I've tried to stop pushing this last week." Seeing his stricken face, Kaoru quietly finished, "I just want you to be happy. So if this is because you feel sorry for me, I'd feel better if," her voice wavered for a moment, "if you didn't."

Closing his eyes in apparent pain, he spoke softly. "When I'm with you, I am happy. I didn't mean to hurt you. I know that my being here puts you in danger. That's why I tried to keep from being too close. I didn't want you to depend on me too much in case someone finally killed me, or I had to leave again to keep you safe… but maybe I was just trying to keep myself safe."

Opening his eyes, he threaded his fingers through hers and stared down at them. His next words were spoken so softly she had to strain to hear them. "I'm afraid to care that much about someone. They always leave, and when they go it breaks off another piece of my soul, leaving me torn and bloody. I didn't want that agony again. I didn't want you to die."

Looking up, his eyes blazed into hers like a noonday sun, "I thought to keep us both safe, but it was too late. You already mean too much, and when Eni- when _he_ killed you, it destroyed me." Tears gathered like liquid sunlight in his eyes as his hands crushed hers.

Kaoru suppressed a wince as she spoke soothingly. "But he didn't kill me, didn't even hurt me. I'm right here, and so are you. Unbroken."

"It's too late though," he continued, as if he didn't even hear her. "I thought that I could make you happy by staying around, be by your side as only a friend and still keep us both safe. But I can't help caring about you more than I should. I tried to content myself with what I had. You had given me so much to be happy about, you see. But then you pulled away. You were leaving me even though you were still here, and then I knew."

Gentling his grip, he brought their entwined hands up to his mouth and kissed her knuckles tenderly. "I need you. I know that now, I admit it. I don't need air or water or food, I need _you_. Let me in, give me your heart, and I will nurture it until this body's last breath sends my soul winging up, holding to the memory of your beauty throughout my next cycle of life."

In the silence left by his words, Kaoru could hear the distinct plop, plop, splash of raindrops dripping from the corner of the roof where a beam had been damaged during a fight and never repaired. Randomly, she thought of Hanaike-san and Ishida-san from the market, and hoped enough water had fallen to help their crops. She hoped for a lot of things, not least of which was the man standing before her. _Well, you just got your heart's desire. What are you waiting for?_

"Himura Kenshin, you've had my heart since the very beginning. You idiot, of course I love you."

"There will still be dangers," he told her, the words torn from his mouth guiltily even as his eyes rejoiced.

"I know. I've known for a long time the cost of having you stay with me. I freely choose to pay it," Kaoru declared fiercely.

Kenshin's eyes were the brightest she'd seen them yet. Like a conflagration of fire stretching from horizon to horizon, blotting out even the sky in its radiance as it burned away old growth from fields to make way for the new. Insistently his eyes demanded the attention of her own, until the sound of dripping rain and the whistle of a lone bird faded, and all she could think or see or hear was a wash of gold.

When he finally spoke, she could fell the intensity of his voice like a touch. " _I love you_. Whatever comes, know this. Never doubt it, I love you."

Kaoru felt her lower lip quiver and tears form in her eyes. After so long, to finally hear him say it, and to believe it! "Oh, Kenshin," she choked out as a tear streaked down her cheek.

"Kaoru, hush my love, don't cry," he soothed, cupping her cheeks in his hands, but this just made the tears spill faster. Making calming sounds, he wiped the tears from her cheeks with his thumbs. His tender, loving solicitude touched her so deeply. She tried to stop crying, knowing it was a silly reaction. However she couldn't seem to make her eyes obey.

Smiling through the tears in her eyes, she tried to tell him that she was fine. But as the drops continued to fall, Kenshin seemed to become more and more distressed. Consolingly, he began kissing her tears away, smoothing his lips across her forehead, cheeks, and tear-spiked eyelashes. When his kisses caressed her lips they changed, becoming no less tender, but more urgent and intense.

For the first time since the death of her parents, Kaoru felt complete. She felt loved. It was a glorious feeling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shihandai is the correct spelling according to volume 1 of the Japanese manga and means 'assistant instructor.'
> 
> Gi vs. Kimono – During the Meiji era, fashion was fluid and a lot of people experimented with different clothing combinations. So all of those crazy outfits worn by villains and allies throughout RK might have possibly been worn sometimes. Going back over the pictures in the RK art books and manga, it looks like Kenshin is wearing not a hakama, but a white pair of very baggy hakama-like pants that are sewn on the inside of the leg and at the crotch. Such bottoms would make it impossible to wear a full-length kimono, meaning he must be wearing a gi. In some pictures it looks like a hakama, so it is possible that he has both, but in the fighting pictures you can usually see a definite split between his legs where a seam is sewed. Thus I am writing that Kenshin is wearing a gi. However, I don't know what the name of his hakama-pants is, so I shall incorrectly continue to call them hakama until someone informs me of the correct nomenclature. Also, Kaoru does wear a gi to practice in, so that was correct. In summary, both are wearing gi with their hakama.
> 
> Yahiko, however, does wear the usual kimono covered by a hakama, as do many of the other men in this era.
> 
> Dictionary:  
> Hakama- The skirt-like pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. (Thanks for the clarification from Kathryn Angelle.)
> 
> Dake- Only
> 
> Shihandai- Assistant instructor, Kaoru's title per the Japanese manga (spelling is correct)
> 
> Sakura- Cherry blossom


	9. Her Pounding Heart

Lovingly kissing Kaoru's tear-salted lips, Kenshin wondered if she realized just how vulnerable and raw he felt telling her his feelings. By giving voice to the private desires of his heart, he was practically challenging fate to intervene. Deepening their kiss, he pushed these concerns to the back of his mind to deal with at a later date. For now he would focus on feeling happy and the tickling of her fingers down the nape of his neck.

Their words of love had soothed one part of his psyche, but roused another. He felt an overwhelming urge to touch, taste, and mark every inch of this vital woman as his to protect and love. Thought became deed as his hands roved over her sweat-slick body.

Temporarily removing his mouth from the beguiling taste of grapefruit and jasmine, he kissed down the arm Kaoru had wrapped around his neck. First he finished his exploration of her clavicle that she had so rudely interrupted before, making sure to leave a mark of his passion before he continued. Then he blazed his lips across her shoulder to trace the subtle delineations on her bicep with tongue and teeth. Teasingly, Kaoru walked the fingers of her hand down his back and side, forcing Kenshin to follow it farther and farther down to continue his exploration. Her other hand traced swirls on his stomach and chest distractingly.

Lingering in the indent of her elbow, he looked up through his lashes at Kaoru's glowing blue eyes and playful grin. He was sure that she could feel his own smile pressing against the soft skin of her elbow. Placing one hand between her shoulder blades and the other in the small of her back, he noticed a suspicious crease appearing between Kaoru's brows. She must have noticed the devilish twinkling of his eyes. Lifting his mouth from her arm he grinned. Then he dipped her.

Arching Kaoru back, he smiled at her squeak of alarm and frantic clutching of his shoulders. Meanwhile, he smoothly transferred his mouth to the damp skin of her stomach, feasting on her slightly salty taste. She squeaked again as his mouth dipped briefly into her navel, but this time her choked gasp conveyed more pleasure than alarm.

Moving back up, he kissed along the skin just below the binding on her breasts. The pleasant scrape of Kaoru's fingers along his scalp made him shudder in bliss. Bringing her slowly upright, he moved his hand from between her shoulders to cup her breast, tracing its pointed tip through the cloth and wringing a whimper from her throat.

He was just considering replacing his hand with his mouth when Kaoru's hand fisted against his scalp and tugged firmly. "Up," she demanded, her second, harder tug ripping several strands out. Conceding with a slight wince, he followed the guidance of her hands as she forced his head back up towards her own. Then she proceeded to claim his lips in such a way that he forgot why he had resisted in the first place.

When they parted for breath, Kaoru tossed her head, flicking hair off of her shoulders and face. The sweat of her former and current exertions, however, had glued several strands stubbornly in place. "Kenshin," she began breathily, "your sakabatou is poking me." Glancing down in bemusement, he only had time to see that his sword was slung completely behind him, not touching her at all. _Oh-_ he thought, before Kaoru also chose to look down, cracking her forehead against his in the process.

"Ow," she moaned as they both brought hands up to clutch at their faces. "I'm so sorry," she groaned in awkward misery, hiding behind her hands. "I'm such a klutz."

Lowering his hands, Kenshin had to chuckle. Her head shot up at his laugh and the embarrassment on her face was quickly joined by anger. "So you think it's funny I'm clumsy do you?" she asked testily, poking him hard in the chest.

Easily catching her hand, he tried to stop his laughter. "No, no, no, I wasn't laughing at you, I was laughing at us." Tilting his head to the side he grinned at her. "I think we are both hard-headed enough to survive it. However, if you think it might help I'm more than willing to kiss it better?" Unwillingly she chuckled. As quickly as her anger had appeared it vanished, replaced by a slight smile.

Tenderly he kissed her reddened forehead. Running the back of his fingers along her cheeks, he lovingly brushed the locks of her hair back behind her ears. Of course, most of them refused to stay, falling back into place in a silken waterfall, but it gave him an excuse to continue touching her. Moving soft midnight hair back behind her strong shoulders, he traced glancing caresses along the skin of her cheeks, neck, shoulders, and arms over and over as he made sure to remove any strand that might hide even a speck of her glorious skin from his keen gaze. The final strand Kenshin plucked off of her moist lips. Even though nothing was left, his hand returned to her mouth again just to experience the sensation of her breath puffing against his sensitive fingertips.

Besides a few contented sighs, Kaoru had been strangely quiescent while he smoothed back her hair. With his forefinger barely touching her lower lip, he looked up into her eyes. They were dilated large and black and consuming, trapping him in their fathomless depths. He had never been a more willing prisoner.

Then her tongue darted out and swirled around the pad of his finger. Her eyes closed as she opened her mouth and enveloped his finger in her moist, velvety heat. When she instinctively sucked on the digit his body convulsed at the overwhelmingly arousing sensation. Pulling his fingers out of her mouth jerkily, he caught her uncertain look.

"If we aren't careful, you'll finish me before I've begun," he explained huskily. Blushing, she still looked slightly lost and oh, so sweet. Unable to resist any longer, he moved forward to taste the delicate flesh of her sweet mouth again. His fingers massaged up and down her sides, the remnants of sweat making his fingers glide over her skin. Circling his thumbs against her hips, he hesitated for a moment at the hem of her hakama.

"Please," Kaoru gasped into his mouth, not knowing what she asked for. But he did. Sweeping his palms past the knotted ties at her waist, he painted his fingers down the bare line of her thighs through the slits in her hakama. Worshipfully he caressed the petal-soft skin he'd watched so hungrily mere minutes before, skin he knew no other man had ever touched. In response, Kaoru tossed her head to the side whimpered in the back of her throat, "Ken-shin."

For Kenshin, it was like throwing oil on a fire. Nipping her earlobe, he slid his hands beneath the rough cloth of her hakama and firmly grabbed her bottom. "Mine," he growled into her ear as he used his grip to press her tightly against the cradle of his body.

* * *

Kaoru heard whimpering and dimly realized that she was the one making the sounds. Kenshin's mouth and hands were everywhere. She'd realized that it wasn't his sword pressing against her, but she didn't feel like stopping to ask him about it anymore. As long as he let her steer occasionally, she'd happily relinquished control. When his mouth returned from its voyage to nibble on her lips, she felt the throbbing in her body grow stronger. The pounding of her heart grew louder and louder.

When Kenshin pulled back and moved his hands back to her shoulders, she felt a wrench of disappointment. "That pounding," he gasped out raggedly.

"My heart," she replied, reeling him back against her body.

After another drugging kiss, he pulled back again, though this time his hands kept clutching her hips. "The gate," he insisted incoherently, "Sano and Yahiko."

"Who?" she asked dazedly, distracted by the subtle patters he was tracing on the curves of her hips and thighs. Her own fingers were pleasurably occupied mapping the tracings of scars down his body. Right now her left hand was following a particularly intriguing scar that disappeared beneath the cloth at his waist.

Letting out a satisfied masculine laugh, he pulled her in for a hard, possessive kiss. Then grabbing her wrists, he carefully removed her arms from around his body. Gently kissing the back of her hands, he joined them together at her waist and let them go.

"I have to let them in before they break in and see something that would scar them for life." The slightly sinister smirk he gave as he pronounced the word _scar_ distracted Kaoru from her pout as he walked away.

"Wha-," she tried to ask, but the lingering taste of him inside her mouth, along with the play of muscles in his back flexing underneath the red scratches from her fingernails, proved too compelling. The pounding started again, this time even more raucously. Trying to concentrate on the sound, Kaoru managed to figure out that it came from outside of her body.

Looking at Kenshin and all of that golden skin only made her feel more muddle-headed, so she focused instead on the sword rack against the wall. This seemed to help because after a moment, she could understand the voices calling out to be let in or they'd break the gate down. _Sano and Yahiko: friend and student._ Kaoru blushed when she realized she hadn't even recognized their names a minute ago.

While she'd been distracted, Kenshin had shrugged back into the sleeves of his gi and tried to straighten the ties of his hakama. Running his fingers through his hair in a doomed attempt to straighten it, he picked up her crumpled gi from against the wall. As he turned to walk back to her, he paused. His golden eyes swept up and down her disheveled body, taking a moment to memorize her form. Then letting out a long breath, he strode determinedly forward and delicately helped her shrug back into her clothing.

Stepping back, he closed his eyes, clenched his fists, and took several more deep breaths. When they opened, Kaoru could see purple swirls coalescing in his golden gaze and the familiar Rurouni mask sliding back into place. But when he glanced over at her before walking outside, the purple disappeared under a fresh wash of gold. Cursing – _Kenshin cursing! –_ he strode over to the walland grabbed her discarded water jug. Then he walked out towards the sound of the increasingly vociferous yelling at the gate, keeping his eyes turned away from her corner of the dojo.

* * *

Walking away from Kaoru's passion-dazed eyes was one of the hardest things Kenshin had ever had to do. She had matched him kiss for kiss and his back and scalp still tingled from the passionate bite of her nails. Those little gasps and whimpers she had made when he kissed and touched her drove him wild. Kami, but he loved making her want him! _And I plan on doing a whole lot more of it later, after I deal with this._

As he walked, Kenshin again tried to calm his body down with deep breathing. Things between Kaoru and he were still too fragile to introduce their friends' teasing just yet. He wanted a little bit more time for just the two of them. They still had so much to discuss. He had a feeling that living with Kaoru was about to become a whole lot more interesting.

The violent pounding at the gate was sending off plumes of dust and mist into the surrounding air. Sneezing, he unlatched the gate. Then he strategically positioned the jug in front of his body. He should have more control than this, but with a woman like Kaoru….

Keeping his head tilted down and slightly to the side to hide anything his eyes or expression might betray he opened the gate. Immediately he was barraged with a tidal wave of complaints and accusations from his friends. For a moment, his mind drew a blank. _What do I normally say in these situations?_ Then years of habit kicked in.

"Maa maa, the gate must have accidentally latched… when this unworthy one came in, that it did." Belatedly, he remembered to tack on his usual humble mode of speech. Luckily, they both seemed too irate to notice. Pasting a facsimile of his Rurouni smile onto his face, he merely nodded his head occasionally.

"And if we hadn't decided to take shelter under a tree during that cloudburst, we might have been trapped outside this gate and gotten soaked!" Yahiko finally concluded heatedly. Thinking about just what he had been doing at that moment himself, Kenshin repositioned the jug in front of his body and shifted his weight. Sano was looking at him strangely, which meant that it was definitely time to retreat.

"I- this unworthy one," quickly correcting himself, he feared it was too much to ask that Sano had missed his Battousai-like slip and the significance of the jug, "was just getting some more water to get dinner started, that I was." Turning away from them unhurriedly, he attempted to walk nonchalantly towards the kitchen. Speaking over his shoulder, he mouthed a few more empty platitudes, very conscious of the jug he still held in front of himself. Hopefully, Sano would blame his odd behavior on the incident with Kaoru's students earlier that day. Yahiko was probably still too inexperienced to pick up on such subtle cues, though he might have noticed Kenshin's verbal slip-up.

Their complaining voices tapered off. Hearing Yahiko's footsteps heading away, he hoped he might actually successfully escape. He was only a few steps away from the kitchen porch when Sano's voice called out, "Oi, Kenshin."

Not stopping his steps, he turned to look back over his shoulder towards this last obstacle. "Yes?" he enquired with what he hoped was suitable politeness and not the teeth-baring frustration he really felt.

"The back of your gi's loose." After delivering this pronouncement, Sano folded his arms and waited with a twinkle in his eye for Kenshin's explanation.

Mind racing, Kenshin tried to think of a plausible excuse and not how Kaoru must have tugged the material loose at some point while she'd been running her hands along the base of his spine so passionately. Obviously he hadn't straightened his clothing well enough. A good excuse… the truth of a sort, that always worked best. "I stopped by the river to cool off before I returned," Kenshin offered, barely slowing as he reached back to tuck in his gi. Thank the gods Sano seemed to accept this, offering no further comment as Kenshin finally escaped into the kitchen.

* * *

With Kenshin's absence, Kaoru finally realized just what was going on, though considering the circumstances she felt perfectly justified in being so slow to comprehend _. Sano and Yahiko were_ here _and she had been- and then Kenshin had- and then they both had some more- and then he'd left. What if Sano had seen? Yahiko had seen? She would die! They'd never let her live it down, never!_

Panicked breathing rushed through lips that still felt swollen from Kenshin's kisses while blood continued to throb and pool in her veins (and this time she really was certain the pounding came from her body and not someone banging at the gate). She couldn't go out and face them. They'd take one look at her and _know_ all of the naughty things she'd thought… and just done!

Placing hands on her blushing cheeks, Kaoru felt hot, sweaty, still rather aroused and very embarrassed all at once. But with Kenshin gone and Yahiko and Sano back, there was nothing she could do about any of it right now.

Feeling a prickling against her cheek, Kaoru drew her hand away and looked down. Entwined with her fingers were several strands of Kenshin's red-gold hair and a sprinkling of jade-hued pine needles. Lifting her hand to her nose, she drew in a deep intoxicating breath of pine and _Kenshin_. Sighing, she carefully unwound her new treasure from her fingers, looked around to make sure she was still alone, and secreted it inside her gi. Then, shaking out her arms and fingers, she pulled her head out of the clouds and tried to figure out what to do next.

 _Right, so a strategic retreat to the bathhouse is in order._ Kaoru calculated that if she took the long way around the perimeter of the house, she could avoid running into the others all together. Securing her gi, she felt her pulse slow down as she planned out her route and strategy. Thanks to Misao, she knew quite a lot about sneaking around without being noticed. Peeking out one of the open shoji, she saw Yahiko heading towards his room.

 _Perfect, so as long as the bathhouse is empty and Kenshin didn't decide to rinse off first I should be-_ an image of Kenshin pouring a bucket of cold water over a body adorned only in soap suds sashayed into her strategy session. Kaoru's mental eyes followed the rivulets of water as they coursed down the planes of his chest and stomach, but a few inches below his bellybutton, _a body part I deny being obsessed with,_ the image became as blurry as her heat-scorched courtyard. _Can't blame a girl for trying,_ she thought with a mental smirk.

"Oi, Kenshin," rang out Sano's voice, disturbingly close outside. Brought jarringly back to the present, Kaoru realized that she might be on the brink of being discovered. Not to mention that her body was once again throbbing in frustration. _Great, focus you idiot!_

Well, Sano's words meant that the bathhouse was still a viable refuge, _unless Kenshin and Sano were in there togeth…._

Sometimes, Kaoru really hated her imagination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dictionary:
> 
> Hakama- The skirt-like pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. (Thanks for the clarification from Kathryn Angelle.)
> 
> Dake- Only
> 
> Shihandai- Assistant instructor, Kaoru's title per the Japanese manga
> 
> Sakabatou- Kenshin's reverse blade sword
> 
> Rurouni- Wanderer
> 
> Battousai- Kenshin's name during his time as an assassin
> 
> Sakura- Cherry blossom
> 
> Shoji- Paper sliding door
> 
> Maa maa- So, so. A placating interjection.
> 
> There seems to be a lot of misunderstanding of my meaning in those last two lines. As a reader, you are completely free to interpret it any way you like. But I guess I was assuming people would think that because they were both guys they could bathe together, which is completely acceptable in Japan with the whole group bathing thing they have. I was just thinking, well, naked Kenshin hot, and naked Sano, who is taller with more muscles, also hot, and the two of them in the same frame in my mind semi-comatose drool-fest hotness. I was also seeing Kaoru as having acknowledged in her mind that Sano is an attractive man, but that she is too caught up in Kenshin emotionally from before she ever met Sano to think of him in any sort of romantic way. Plus she has never felt all aroused and flustered like this before, so her mind is venturing into territory it might have formerly avoided. On the other hand, Katyclismic suggests that it might be a bit of authorial voice creeping in. ;) I hope this clears up my intentions for that.


	10. A Mysterious Male Fixation

After a brisk rinse and a relaxing soak in the tub, where Kaoru kept her mind firmly away from thoughts of anybody, she felt reenergized. It was amazing what feeling clean could do for a woman. Body and mind both felt refreshed, as if she'd bathed in mint leaves instead of water. She loved the feeling of being clean. It made the whole world seem better and brighter.

Do men feel this different after a bath too? Considering Yahiko's proclivity for getting grimy and staying stinky, boys certainly didn't seem to care. But what about men? Kenshin seemed to enjoy taking regular baths. He certainly always smells like something I'd love to wrap myself up in.

If she had been the one still doing the laundry around the house, she might just use it as an excuse to surreptitiously sniff his clothing. But I'd probably get caught and then they'd tease me mercilessly and use those annoying raccoon nicknames even more. It was just as well she didn't do the laundry anymore.

When Kenshin had left for Kyoto, the dirty clothes had piled up for days before anyone had noticed. It was like everything had stopped once he'd gone. In some of her less sane moments she'd wondered if he'd ever been there at all.

The only trace that he'd ever stayed at her dojo at all was the pain in her heart and the slashed-up blue gi he'd left in the changing area of the bathhouse. In his rush to leave for Kyoto, he must have forgotten it had never been stitched up and returned to his room. Either that or it had been abandoned, just like she had been. When he'd left, it had devastated her. During the day she could barely stand to leave her room. Her nights were spent tossing and turning on her futon.

She wasn't proud of her behavior during that time, but his leaving had come as such a painful shock. Surprises always threw her off balance and, blinded by love, she hadn't prepared herself for his actual departure.

When he'd first come to stay with her and gradually brought the others into her home, it had healed her. The lonely place inside her soul scraped raw and bleeding, first by the loss of her family and then by the desertion of her friends and students, had healed over before she even realized it. Young, alone, and for so long secretly scared, she had used his comforting presence as a basis for a newfound happiness.

Though Kenshin had told her that he might leave to wander again, it soon became such an appalling idea that she couldn't bear to even think of it. When Kenshin was around, life was a joy. Optimistic, frightened, or blind, she had refused to acknowledge how fragile her happiness was.

Until he said goodbye to her on a night alight with fireflies. The air had been warm, but her cheeks felt bitterly cold in the darkness of his absence. Even her scalding tears could not permanently warm them. So often a new injury felt numb when first dealt. That night she had not been so lucky. Oh Kami, it had hurt. He'd ripped away her security and serenity in seconds, reopening that tortuous wound she'd thought long since healed in her soul. She recognized her mistake then in relying on him so heavily, but by then it was too late.

His abandonment resurrected an army of painful memories from her past. Every piece of her heart taken to the grave with the death of a loved one, every time an acquaintance, friend, or former student had refused to meet her eye in the marketplace because of vicious rumors, every time she had been forced to be strong because there was no one there to be strong for her – all of these memories flooded her mind, sweeping away her stability and drowning her in sorrow.

After he had gone, she kept imagining that she saw him out of the corner of her eye. In the midst of turning to greet him, she'd remember with a nauseating jolt that he had moved on. No matter how hard she tried to forget, her mind kept replaying how the back of the man she loved most in this world looked as he walked willingly away from her into the night. The only way she could sleep at all was when she'd wrap his forgotten blue gi over her sleeping yukata and bury her nose in the collar, lulled by the scent of ginger and sandalwood.

Even though they had eventually been reunited, Kaoru hadn't returned the gi. She kept it hidden in the bottom of a chest in her room, still just as torn as the day he abandoned it. By now she probably only imagined his faint fragrance in the fabric, especially since she'd been forced to wash it. Nevertheless, she would still sometimes sleep with it wrapped around her shoulders or cuddled to her face.

When she'd made her resolution to forget Kenshin the week before, she had deliberately avoided thinking about the gi smuggled in the bottom of her chest. Rationally, Kaoru knew it should be thrown out or returned, but deep down she just couldn't bear to part with it yet. To avoid having to make a final decision, she kept herself from thinking about it all together.

Coming back to the present, Kaoru shook her head briskly. She should stop dawdling and finish tying up her hair. Kenshin was here now and, if his words of the afternoon were to be believed, seemed here to stay.

Holding a blue ribbon between her teeth, she gathered the mass of her hair into her usual high ponytail before tying it off. While she may not have the most complicated hairstyle, it was convenient, easy to fix, and she'd perfected the art of holding a ribbon in her teeth without drooling on it. Not every girl could say that. As a matter of fact, she didn't think she'd ever heard another girl say that, not that she'd said it out loud herself, but still.

She was sure Kenshin would enjoy a refreshing bath after working on the clinic roof all day, though he hadn't seemed grimy. The traces of powdery dust and slick sweat she'd touched and tasted on his skin had only reinforced the delicious reality of his presence. No, she hadn't minded that at all, though she did wonder how a bath would change things.

Would he taste more intensely Kenshin? Was it possible he could smell even more masculine and intoxicating?

Flustered, she wondered if he ever had thoughts like this. After my bath has he ever imagined the taste of my skin, or wanted to bury his nose into the damp hair at the nape of my neck and inhale?

Letting out a long breath, Kaoru finished making the bow in her ribbon. She felt ready to once again face the world as if nothing had happened, or at least face Sano and Yahiko. She didn't think she would ever be able to face Kenshin again without thinking about what had happened. The true test would come when next she saw him. If she managed to get through the evening without a blush she would count it a miracle.

Whether it was an hour or a week, she always ached when she was apart from him. The events of the afternoon had only strengthened her yearning. She loved the reassuring feel of his skin beneath her fingertips when their hands touched as he passed her tea and the warm, syrupy feeling he created in her stomach when she gazed into his mesmerizing eyes. While she knew such neediness was an overly sentimental weakness, with Kenshin she just couldn't seem to help herself.

A small voice whimpered that perhaps the golden sun really had spawned a golden-eyed delusion and she'd passed out with her limbs spread-eagled on the dojo floor. Or that she'd been staring at the wall daydreaming from start to finish. But no, she'd pretty firmly proved that the events of the afternoon were real. She felt silly enough for thinking he was a fantasy in the first place, she wasn't about to compound her stupidity now. Besides, there were the … marks.

When she'd disrobed to take her bath, she'd been a bit shocked at the state of her body. Her skin seemed hypersensitive to the most glancing touch of cloth or fingers. Just letting down her hair to tumble against the skin of her shoulders and back had sent a shudder rippling through her body.

It wasn't until she'd started unwinding the cloth around her chest that she'd noticed them – brands of passion left on her skin. A scarlet blush had swept from chest to cheeks when she'd run trembling hands across the love marks: small purple bruises and reddish bite marks produced by his lips and teeth. They sprinkled down her shoulders, the top of her breasts, and even her waist.

One she could dismiss as an accident, but thinking back on some of the possessive things he'd whispered before nipping her, she came to the conclusion that his marking had been deliberate. But for what purpose? For her to remember him by when they were apart? Like I could ever forget Kenshin's kisses. Or could it be some mysterious male fixation? Perhaps to other men the marks advertised that she belonged to him?

She'd been so caught up in the whirlwind of arousal that she didn't even remember when or where half of them had come from. For example, she'd swear his lips hadn't ventured that low, but a faint love bite on the lower curve of her stomach proved her wrong. The nip right above her bellybutton though, she quite clearly remembered what he'd been doing when she'd received that.

Kaoru wanted to feel irritated that he'd marked her like some primitive caveman chiseling his name into her body. She wasn't anyone's property! Kamiya Kaoru was a strong, independent woman who could do anything she wanted with anyone.

However, the sad truth was that deep down she didn't feel irritated at all. In fact, she rather liked it. She didn't want anyone else; she had only ever wanted him. A primitive, feminine instinct rejoiced in his claiming. She wanted this strong man to so desire her that he left evidence of his passion on her skin, left signs that she belonged to him and no other.

It worked the other way too. If she could, she'd like to warn all of the other women away, especially a certain foxy female doctor. Yes, and I'd make him walk around with a sign on his chest that read, 'Property of Kamiya Kaoru, touch on pain of my wrath.' Of course the major drawback to that plan was that if he wore a sign on his chest, she wouldn't be able to see the delectable golden skin and sculpted muscles of said chest. Plus it could get in the way during any battles he might have. But she looked at his chest more often than he got into fights, so the first consideration was really the important one. Gah, I did not just think that!

Blinking slightly glazed eyes, Kaoru checked the neckline of her kimono one last time, making sure it was still secure and hiding all of the evidence. Running her fingers over a rough line of stitching where she'd sewn up a tear on her thigh, she wondered how many more repairs this kimono would take. Thank goodness the dark blue fabric's white waves helped to disguise many of her stitches. Of course, if she sewed as neatly as Kenshin it might not look quite as worn down. Unfortunately, sewing and cooking were two things she didn't have much patience for, or aptitude. Living with Yahiko for over a year had left her with no illusions about that.

Looking down at the most recent seam near her shoulder, she realized that it was directly on top of one of Kenshin's love bites. She was definitely taking all of her baths alone until these healed. Tae had invited her to go along to a public bath sometime in the next couple of days to catch up with each other. Now Kaoru would have to make up an excuse not to go. There was no way she could show so many gossipy women the betraying marks on her body. Not and still hold her head up in public, especially since she was still a single woman on her own.

Even if they were married she'd feel too embarrassed to be seen like this by all of her neighbors. Then again, there were always exceptions. She'd have no compunction about 'accidentally' letting a mark show to one of those young hussies who liked to bat their eyelashes at her gorgeous redhead. Ha! He claimed me, not you. I may have taken his sign off, but I still have it and will hit you with it if you bat even one more eyelash. So get lost, you figurative hussy!

However, for now they weren't married so such crowing would have to wait. Perhaps she was getting ahead of herself with such thoughts, but when a man says forever I think a girl has the right to expect marriage at some point. Especially if said girl is willing to attack him with pointy objects if he doesn't propose.

But as for now, she would have to keep herself well covered until they healed. Besides, if Kaoru was really honest with herself, this was all so new and slightly confusing. Never in all of her musings had she expected to find herself in a situation quite like this. For now she just wanted to keep this something private between herself and Kenshin.

She'd feel mortified if anyone saw and asked where the marks had come from. She'd have to cover her head with a tofu bucket to hide her identity and glowing red cheeks. Gearing herself up to leave the safety of the bathhouse, Kaoru just hoped that if such an event ever happened, she'd at least be lucky enough to find a tofu bucket without tofu in it.

Stepping cautiously outside into the patchy sunshine, Kaoru was delighted to see an empty courtyard and a sky still strewn with pillows of clouds. Remember, just act normal, she thought optimistically. Rounding the porch with a spring in her step, Kaoru felt her pace falter at the sight of Sano lounging on the porch against one of the wooden posts, chewing on his ever-present fishbone. She liked to think that he changed them out periodically, but just how long those periods stretched she didn't really know. It was one of those mysteries she wasn't in any hurry to solve, either.

"Evenin' Jou-chan," Sano drawled lazily with a glint in his eyes. Slightly nervous but hoping for the best, she leaned against the next post. "Sano," she acknowledged, "so how did the roof patching go?"

Snorting, he shifted position and replied. "Not much patching and a whole lot of building new shi-," catching her narrowed eyes he hastily changed what he was going to say, "stuff, that's how. I shoulda known by now not to believe that woman when she uses the words 'little' and 'job' in the same sentence."

"Did you have to get someone else to help you two out then? Maybe one of those little boys who live next to the clinic to show you which end of the hammer to hold?" Kaoru teased as she smiled over Megumi's trickery. Since she wasn't a victim this time she found it rather amusing.

When Megumi had returned home to Aizu a few months before, the only good Kaoru had been able to see in it at the time had been the surcease of the constant teasing. But while she'd never admit it, after a few weeks she woke up one day actually missing the Fox's mocking laughter. With both Sano and Megumi gone, and Saito transferred to Hokkaido, life had become a lot quieter. Also a good deal duller, as Kaoru missed the outlet for her energy that the fighting had provided.

When Megumi had decided to return to Tokyo last month, Kaoru hadn't cared why. She was just ecstatic that her friend was back. Of course, Kaoru had conveniently forgotten in the intervening months how really and truly annoying Megumi could be when she was flirting with Kenshin.

Yet not everything was the same. Something had happened while Megumi had been in her family's hometown those months. Just what wasn't clear, but Megumi seemed more centered and happy since she had returned. Kaoru hoped she knew that if she ever wanted to talk, Kaoru was willing to listen. A few times it seemed like Megumi was on the verge of saying something, but so far she had always stopped. Which seems strange since the usual problem with Megumi is that you can't get her to stop, especially when she's flirting with Kenshin… or Sano, Kaoru thought to herself with a secret grin. If the last month was any indication of Megumi's and Sano's feelings, absence certainly had made the heart grow fonder.

"Ha ha," Sano sardonically replied to her teasing about his roofing skills, gripping his fishbone a little tighter in his teeth, "I'll have you know I'm an excellent roofer. Don't need no brats to show me how to get a job done right. In fact, I remember just last year hammerin' away on your roof, and I haven't heard no complaints about leaks ever since," he finished with a glare.

"That's because you abandoned us for months on end while you traveled the world and haven't been around when it rains," Kaoru rejoined. Seeing his glare turn into a semi-guilty frown she lightened her teasing. "Though it really hasn't started leaking… yet." Once again proving his maturity, Sano stuck his tongue out at Kaoru.

"I'm a very hard worker," Sano boasted. Scowling at her disbelieving laughter he grudgingly finished, "when I feel like it." As Kaoru continued to laugh he further conceded, "Which isn't very often. But hey, why not take life easy if you can? As long as I know I can work hard, there's no need to prove it to anyone else."

"Oh Sano," Kaoru gasped through her laughter, "how I've missed you."

"I missed you too, Jou-chan. After all," he smiled, "out of everyone in Tokyo, I chose your place to stay at. I may be a freeloader, but I have standards," he ended with an upraised finger and cheeky grin.

"Well, since I can't think of a reply that doesn't now insult myself," she grumbled good-naturedly after a moment of considering and rejecting several comebacks, "I'll let you go talk to Kenshin and decide who gets to use the bathhouse next." Quite proud of her scheme to avoid Kenshin for a little bit longer, at least until she was sure she wouldn't try to either run away or cling to him like an octopus, Kaoru straightened up to leave. Feeling quite congratulatory as she smoothed the wrinkles out of her dark blue kimono, it took her a moment to understand the implications of Sano's next question.

"Speaking of Kenshin, what were the two of you up to that made him so slow to open the gate?" As her mind raced, Sano continued with his poking, "After all, a man with god-like speed would have to be mighty distracted by something to take that long."

Kaoru hated lying. Not necessarily because of the moral implications, but more because she was simply awful at it. Somehow people always seemed to know, like it was inked on her forehead in glowing red symbols. However, the gods seemed to be favoring her today so perhaps she had a chance getting away with it this time. After all, what else would have made Kenshin finally act like that but divine intervention?

Putting on her most innocent face she replied, "I'd finally perfected a kata I've been working on for years and asked to show Kenshin the result." Wow that was even sort of true, except for the trying to show him part. Kenshin just sort of showed up unexpectedly, not that I'm complaining! Despite her traitorous mind's attempt to wallow in the memory, Kaoru forced herself to keep going. Keeping an image of Sano, Yahiko, and Megumi all pointing and laughing helped to ground her in the moment."He was kind enough to let me finish before answering the gate. I'm sorry it took so long."

"Hmm," was his inscrutable reply. How am I supposed to tell if he bought it or not if all he'll say is "hmm?" She tried waiting for more, but instead of saying anything his eyes just started twinkling.

"Well, are you going to go take your bath now or not?" Kaoru asked in annoyance. Still not answering, Sano just kept staring at her and chewing on his fishbone. Blowing her bangs out of her face, Kaoru snapped. "Stop it, Sanosuke!" A large grin slowly overtook his twitching lips. Deciding to ignore him, Kaoru turned around and stomped inside.

Reaching the hallway outside of her room, Kaoru hesitated. Perhaps she should go back and talk to Sano again? What if he knew? Perhaps she could say something to convince him that he was mistaken? Quelling the panicky feeling strangling her chest, she decided against it. Sano's not that bright, right? Right? He was probably just teasing me. Not entirely comforted but unwilling to think about it anymore, she decided to take a short nap before dinner. Walking into her room, she turned and shut the shoji.

A moment later, her head poked back into the hallway. Glancing left and right, she made certain that no one was around before padding quickly and silently down the hall. Focusing on the shiny bone needle sticking out of the sleeve of Kenshin's magenta gi, she hesitated. Obviously he'd been interrupted and set the gi down on the small lacquered table in the hall before he'd finished sewing it. When did he tear this? Strongly tempted, Kaoru chewed on her lower lip as she glanced up and down the hall again. Would he come back for it before dinner tonight? Perhaps I shouldn't. After all, I still have his blue gi, even if it smells more like me now than him.

Bending over, she took a slight whiff of the fabric. Ginger and sandalwood. Snatching up the magenta gi, careful not to prick herself on the needle, she ran back to her room and quickly slid the shoji closed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dictionary:  
> Hakama- The skirt-like pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. (Thanks for the clarification from Kathryn Angelle.)
> 
> Dake- Only
> 
> Yukata- Light-weight summer or sleeping kimono/robe
> 
> Shoji- Paper sliding door


	11. Open Your Mouth, Close Your Eyes, and You Will Get a Big…

Gentle knocking woke Kaoru up from the most delicious sleep she'd experienced in a very long time. Burrowing her nose deeper into the fabric covering Kenshin's arm, she inhaled contentedly. The staccato knocking came again, this time a little louder.

Pouting at the disturbance of her comfortable nook she demanded, "Kenshin, tell them to go away." At least that's what she intended to say. Refusing to lift her face from its happy place, what actually came out was a mumbled mishmash of, "Kenshi, tem go 'way." A few moments of blessed silence followed. Rubbing her nose against his arm affectionately, she started to drift back to sleep.

"Ah, I am most sorry Kaoru-dono, but it is time for dinner, that it is. If you sleep any longer I fear that Yahiko and Sano will eat all of the food, that they will."

Evil ingrates, was Kaoru's first thought. Then she realized that Kenshin's voice had come from outside of the shoji. He can throw his voice? That's kinda creepy. I hope he doesn't have one of those weird puppets stashed in his room that he can make talk. Last time I saw one of those I had nightmares for a week. Of course, I was only… sev…en. As sleep descended again, her thoughts slowed.

"Kaoru-dono? Kaoru-dono, you need to wake up now, that you do." Lifted closer to wakefulness again, Kaoru scrunched her nose in displeasure but still refused to open her eyes, despite his gently insistent voice.

"Little Shihandai," his suddenly low-pitched and husky voice reached into the room, "if you make me come in there to wake you up, I guarantee we won't be coming out until breakfast tomorrow, no matter what Yahiko and Sano might say in the morning."

Springing up from her futon into a sitting position, Kaoru blinked gummy eyes open and gurgled out, "I'm 'wake, I'm awake." From the other side of the shoji she heard a sigh. "Pity," he murmured wickedly before his deliberately audible footsteps moved back down the corridor towards the kitchen.

Walking away? But he's right her- Looking at where she expected Kenshin to be, she instead saw only her own left arm wrapped in Kenshin's magenta gi. She was alone. And she'd made Kenshin go away by saying she was awake. Idiot. As she tried to lift the gi up for a closer look, she realized that something was wrong. Her arm wouldn't move. Cocooned in the gi, her arm's dead weight dangled from her shoulder and no matter how hard she concentrated, not even a finger would twitch. The arm she'd snuggled into as she woke up had been her own and, unable to feel any sensation, she'd assumed the smell and texture of Kenshin's gi meant his presence. Double the idiot.

What if he'd noticed the missing gi in the hallway? Of course he noticed, Kenshin notices everything! Panic provided the push she needed to finally come fully awake. Before she could descend into full-blown hysteria however, a small voice piped up in her head. Just like he noticed that you've been in love with him forever? While that was probably a little bit different from her current dilemma, Kaoru decided to latch onto it anyway. She didn't know what she'd say when she saw Kenshin again, but she did know that she wanted to look pretty.

Slowing her breathing, she unwound the gi from her arm and proceeded to get dressed. When she'd laid down for a nap she'd changed into her sleeping yukata. Of course, getting changed with only one arm proved to be rather challenging. She only got as far as the obi before growling in defeat.

Digging out some more words learned from Sano, Kaoru massaged her arm until the painful tingles struck. When a loud oath escaped her mouth she glanced abashedly towards the closed shoji. The minute Sano came back to town my language went downhill again. Sighing at her unladylike mouth, she finished tying her obi. I may curse like a… well, a Sano, but at least the tie of my obi looks very feminine.

Not ready but knowing she could delay no longer, she opened the shoji and glanced up and down the hall. Satisfied that it was empty, she retrieved the magenta gi she'd stolen and slept with. Kaoru made sure to reinsert the needle into the sleeve, though she couldn't for the life of her remember which sleeve it had been. No time to panic now, just go. Replacing the gi on the small lacquered table in the hall, she squared her shoulders and marched off towards the dining room.

When Kaoru walked into the room, she brought with her the familiar scent of jasmine. Kenshin felt muscles unclench that he hadn't even noticed were tense. Taking his time, he allowed his eyes to drink in her appearance.

Irrationally he felt disappointed that nothing in her form advertised the change in their relationship. While he didn't think it was yet time for Yahiko and Sano to know and offer their opinions, he had hoped for some subtle sign of their time in the dojo and how she was now his. But the hair he'd so carnally disheveled was neatly tied up and the crossed collar of her kimono hid all of his love marks. Her lips still seemed slightly swollen from his kisses, but it might just as easily have been a remnant of her nap. Kenshin had wished for at least a meaningful exchanged look, but even in that it seemed he was to be disappointed.

However, the fact that she was quite determinedly not looking in his direction at all proved in his mind that she was anything but unaffected by his presence. After entering the room she had glanced quickly in his direction before retreating towards Yahiko, the color high in her cheeks as she settled herself down and immediately began riling her student up by calling him the most dreaded epithet for the proud boy: Yahiko-chan.

Allowing a slight smile to curve his lips, Kenshin decided to wait a bit before he pounced. His little innocent obviously wasn't sure how to act around him after their interlude in the dojo. As he walked into the kitchen to bring out their dinner, he heard Sano's voice join their lively bantering.

Tonight's meal was not one of his best creations. Even if the vegetables had been plump and shining he still didn't think it would have turned out well. If Sano hadn't come in to inform him of the empty bathhouse, waking him from his daydreams, they all might have been eating leftover rice and half-raw, half-burnt vegetables past their prime. While it might have been comparable to Kaoru's cooking on a good day, Kenshin would have felt shamed. He knew how hard Kaoru worked for their food. The least she deserved from him was a well cooked meal without any food going to waste.

Thanks to Sano and the excuse of a late start to the cooking, everyone should be satisfied, even if they weren't delighted, about the quality of the meal. Returning with the rice, vegetables, and grilled fish, Kenshin placed the food on the table in the midst of his squabbling companions. One more trip to the kitchen brought the steaming teapot. He'd been planning on cold tea for dinner, but with the advent of the storm this afternoon the weather had cooled down slightly. Being able to drink hot tea again was his celebration of the cooler temperature.

As soon as Kenshin sat down on his cushion everyone quieted down. "Itadakimasu," they all chorused together in thanks for the food before digging in. Tasting the fish, Kenshin was pleased to find that it was not nearly as bad as he had feared.

Over the sounds of clicking chopsticks and serving spoons, Yahiko was simultaneously trying to shovel rice into his mouth and tell them all about an amusing customer at the Akabeko.

"Yahiko, how many times have I told you not to talk with food in your mouth!" Kaoru yelled with exasperation. With a loud and painful sounding gulp he swallowed, then stuck his tongue out and pulled the bottom of one eyelid down in response.

Kenshin wasn't sure where it had come from, but suddenly a shinai appeared in Kaoru's white-fisted hands. Had she stashed it under the table before dinner? Not too concerned with the mystery, he took another bite of rice. Kaoru then proceeded to bop Yahiko over the head with it, causing his face to squish into his vegetables. Wrenching himself up, Yahiko bared his teeth in anger but, after muttering something insulting, went back to his food.

"One of these days you are going to choke, and you can bet when you do I'll be laughing instead of hitting you on the back," Kaoru glowered back before taking a violent bite of her fish.

"You're always hitting me anyway, I'd probably be grateful to choke to death rather than be whacked again," he grumbled in a very poor attempt at sub-vocalization. Kaoru blushed and took a quick glance toward and away from Kenshin's face. Her red cheeks seemed equal parts rage at Yahiko and shame over her unladylike manners.

Doesn't she know by now that I love her exuberance? She wouldn't be the Kaoru he loved without it. Of course, on those days when she turned her temper on him he could wish for a little more moderation.

As Sano reached for the boy's face, Yahiko instinctively flinched back. However, the street fighter only peeled a pickle off of Yahiko's cheek and plopped it into his own mouth. "Hey," Yahiko yelped, "that was mine!"

With a beatific smile Sano replied, "I was only trying to save your life. Choking to death on a pickle is no way to go for an aspiring Tokyo Samurai. Besides, it would break poor Tsubame-chan's heart, ne Yahiko-chan?" With a howl, Yahiko leapt from his seat and attacked, gnawing on Sano and attempting to twist his rooster head off.

During the scuffle, Kaoru and Kenshin continued to calmly eat their food. Interspersed between bites were Kenshin's attempts to catch Kaoru's gaze with his own. Every time he tried he seemed to barely miss her eyes as they darting away. Noticing Kaoru's empty teacup and the way her pink tongue had just peeked out to moisten her upper lip, Kenshin took a deep breath and reached for the teapot. "Would you like more tea, Kaoru… dono?" Staring at her glistening lips, he couldn't keep his voice from deepening.

Languidly lifting her long sooty eyelashes, she met his gaze for the first time that night. To Kenshin, it felt almost like a missing puzzle piece clicking into place with a burst of white-hot light. "Yes, please Kenshin," she replied after a moment. Each syllable of his name spoken in her slightly breathy voice sent a jolt through his body.

Keeping his attention fixed on her cerulean eyes and pink-tinged cheeks, he poured her tea without looking. Desperately he tried not to imaging her mouthing those same words in a different and more intimate situation. He could clearly see the bead of moisture resting on the corner of her bottom lip, just begging to be licked off. In their intimate pocket of silence the stream of pouring tea tinkled, releasing a puff of jasmine scented steam. Peripherally he could hear Sano and Yahiko winding down their scuffle. Somehow he needed to wrench his gaze away from her mesmerizing features before anyone noticed.

In the end, it took outside intervention to break his reverie. When Sano finally managed to throw Yahiko off, Kenshin had the misfortune of being distracted and in the way. One of Yahiko's flailing arms smacked into Kenshin's shoulder, upsetting his concentration and hold on the clay teapot. Luckily Kenshin managed to catch the fragile teapot before it smashed into the wooden table.

Not, however, before hot tea had splashed onto his hand. Carefully setting the teapot down, he hissed quietly and brought his scalded fingers to his mouth. Hearing a soft whimper, he quickly looked up through his lashes at Kaoru, barely in time to catch the dart of her retreating tongue as she stared fixedly at the hand he had just licked. Feeling his lips form a wicked smile against the palm of his hand, Kenshin waited for their eyes to meet. When they did, her lips parted in a soundless gasp.

As much as he wanted to pounce on her right now, Yahiko was joggling his elbow anxiously. "I'm so sorry Kenshin; I didn't mean to hit you, really!"

Closing his eyes for a moment to regain control, he turned away from Kaoru and towards the upset boy. As he opened his eyes again he thought he heard her mutter something that sounding suspiciously like, "if only… tea… bellybutton." He'd have to ask her later just what she had meant.

"Maa maa, a little tea will not harm this unworthy one, that it will not." Patting Yahiko consolingly on the shoulder, he rotated his hand for inspection. "See, no harm done my friend, that there is not."

"Yeah, sorry Kenshin," Sano admitted contritely as he settled himself back down on his cushion. "Jou-chan," he added as his eyes flicked to the almost broken teapot.

Everyone started eating again as conversation turned back to more general topics. Unable to keep himself from touching her any longer, especially not after she had said his name like that, Kenshin unobtrusively slipped his hand behind her body to softly touch her back just above her obi. Immediately Kaoru's cheeks flushed and her lips parted. Delicately he traced the kanji of his name like a brand over her back. Flustered, she dropped her chopsticks, but the others were too busy arguing over the last pickle to notice. He smiled quietly in satisfaction. As Yahiko finally won the pickle through trickery, Kenshin began varying his strokes, tracing the symbols for love, beauty, courage, dearest, and forever in circles around her spine.

"Oi, Kenshin," Sano voice broke in, shattering the intimate moment. "Is there any more rice in the kitchen?" For a brief moment Kenshin was seized with the impulse to lift the man up and fling him into the kitchen to find out for himself.

Letting out a long breath he regretfully lifted his fingers from Kaoru's warm back and stood up. "I'll go get it." He could use a moment alone in the kitchen to compose himself anyway. Perhaps his words had been a bit abrupt, but Kaoru would understand why, Yahiko was too absorbed in tipping the remnants of his bowl down his throat to notice, and Sano could take it any way he liked.

A family dinner was probably not the right time to continue their actions from the dojo. Therefore he decided to try and keep his hands to himself until after dinner. Then he would get her alone and reacquaint himself with those moist lips. After all, he had to teach her not to feel skittish around him before tomorrow's dinner, right? Until then, however, he would behave.

By the time he returned, Sano had already started a long and involved story about being stuck on a becalmed ship for over a week with only weevil-ridden bread to eat. In the midst of the story, Kenshin watched as Kaoru's graceful figure surreptitiously rose and opened the shoji a bit farther to maximize the breeze twirling through the room. Yahiko let out an unconscious sigh of contentment from his sprawl on the floor as the wind tousled his hair.

"But why didn't they just eat rice?" the boy inquired, his forehead crinkled in confusion. Kenshin smiled. He'd heard about this before but decided not to steal Sano's thunder.

"Well," Sano began with a twinkle in his eye as he placed one finger next to his nose and winked, "there are several answers to that question. Do you know what a weevil looks like?"

Yahiko's nose scrunched up in thought before he answered. "Well, kinda like a maggot right? Small and white and sorta shaped like," his forehead smoothed as he looked up in enlightenment, "like rice!"

"Correct!" Sano answered. "So if weevils look like rice, it's harder for people to tell what's food and what's bug. Of course," he began with a sly look in his chestnut eyes, "some sailors develop a taste for them, say it adds protein to their diet and that they like the crunchy texture."

"Eww, Sano!" Kaoru exclaimed in revulsion.

Trust Sano to ruin any romantic mood without even knowing it. You're trying to keep your hands to yourself anyway, remember?

Yahiko, of course, seemed delighted by the idea of eating bugs. "Did you ever eat them, did ya' Sano?"

"Well," he began.

"I'm not listening to this," Kaoru stated as she put her hands over her ears. However the twinkle in her eyes and loose placement of her hands belied her words.

"It wasn't that I ever grew fond of the buggers, but after a few weeks they are in all of the food. After a while it gets to be too much effort to avoid them all," Sano explained.

Lowering her hands Kaoru teased, "And we all know to what lengths you'll go to avoid effort."

Tattooing his heels on the tatami, Yahiko asked, "So what are the other reasons, Sano?"

"You see, a lots of sailors consider it too dangerous to keep rice just to feed the crew," Sano explained. "The only way they'll do it is if they're guaranteed a good profit from its sale at the end of the journey."

"But that makes no sense," Kaoru exclaimed. "What's dangerous about rice?"

"Yeah," Yahiko seconded. "Unless Kaoru cooked it. I would refuse to keep that, too." Another shinai thwack to the head was Kaoru's response. "Damn it, Busu, leave me alone!" Yahiko yelled while clutching at his scalp.

"I would if you'd stop insulting me, and what have I said about swearing inside my house, Yahiko-chan?" Kaoru yelled back. Thus began their usual exchange of a few dozen rounds of "busu"s, bruises, and "Yahiko-chan"s.

During their argument Kenshin went into the kitchen again and put together a new pot of tea. He'd heard it all so many times before that he could recite it in his sleep, complete with choreography. Shaking the tea leaves out into the pot to steep, he thought about how these familiar arguments had come to mean the sounds of home. Voices raised in annoyance, yes, but empty of malice and full of an underlying - though if asked both would claim a very underlying - affection and belonging.

Returning to the dining room with the tea tray, Kenshin caught a flash of light from the corner of his eye. The primal nature of thunder storms had always appealed to him in a deep and visceral way. Mid-step he turned, switching directions to go over and look out the shoji into the dusky sky blanketed with slate gray, dark purple, and, near the horizon, lilac clouds. A few strips of variegated molten orange on the very edge of the western sky betrayed the setting sun. In the east another flash of lightning illuminated the darkening sky for a shining moment before disappearing. Seconds later a rolling boom vibrated through the air.

"Is the storm starting up again?" Yahiko's excited voice suddenly asked at his elbow.

The argument must have ended while he'd been caught up in the storm. "That it is. Let us have our tea on the porch and hear the rest of Sano's explanation. Then we can watch the sky at the same time, that we can."

"That's a wonderful idea, Kenshin," Kaoru said, smiling at him in a way that made him feel taller than a pine tree. Setting the tea tray down outside, he made himself comfortable. Touching his shoulder momentarily for support, Kaoru knelt down by his side on the veranda. Once everyone was seated, she elegantly poured out the tea. She really had more grace than she gave herself credit for. Kenshin hoped no one noticed how the two of them kept sneaking glances at each other.

"So, Sano," Yahiko prodded, "you still have to tell us just how rice can be dangerous." As he spoke the last word another crack of lightning split the sky, followed by a deep growl of thunder that reverberated through the wooden boards of the porch. There was a moment of silence while they all looked at each other.

Then they burst out laughing.

"Oooh, it sounds like we're getting ready for a horror story. Is Yahiko too young for this? Should he worry about nightmares where rice monsters come to get him?" joked Kaoru with a grin. Everyone but the boy in question laughed again.

"Ha ha, very funny, Kaoru. Maybe we should be more worried about your nightmares and what sort of comfort objects they might require, hmm?" he rejoined sarcastically.

Confused as to just what Yahiko was referring to, Kenshin watched Kaoru go white, then red and lunge towards Yahiko with her hands outstretched. "Why you little-," she started to say before both Sano and Kenshin caught her arms from behind.

"Come on Jou-chan, calm down or you'll never get to hear the end of my story," Sano pleaded. Huffing to herself, Kaoru stopped her struggles to get free and settled back down onto her knees.

During the struggle Kenshin had to admit he'd taken shameless advantage of her distraction to touch her as he'd been longing to do again since he'd gone to get Sano's rice. With only one hand grasping her smoothly muscled arm, earned during a lifetime of kendo practices, his other was left free to finger a few strands of her silky jasmine scented hair where it cascaded down her back. Instead of soothing his appetite, it only inflamed his desire to corner her after this friendly dinner and find again that hint of grapefruit mixed with jasmine he'd discovered in her lips and on the skin just below her ear.

Of course, the way she'd squeezed his thigh affectionately just before settling down wasn't helping his attempts to stay cool either. Shifting his weight a bit uncomfortably, he waited for Sano to continue and distract him from his discomfort.

"Where was I?" Sano questioned. "Ah yes, dangerous rice. Ships have been ferrying rice across the ocean for hundreds of years, and for just as many years there have been stories of tragedy: ships disappearing, cargos lost, and sailors betrayed by Lady Luck into the arms of the ravenous ocean." Another crash of thunder shook the porch, but by this time Sano was on a roll and unwilling to stop, even for divine theatrics.

"We all know what happens when you add a handful of rice to a pot of water. Now imagine containers the size of this dojo filled with rice. All of that rice is separated from the vast ocean of water only by the thin wooden keel of the ship. Even a small leak can mean disaster. Once the water starts to soak into the rice, it's either dump the cargo immediately or lose the ship. I've heard stories of ships literally split apart like broken eggs by the force of the expanding rice. Not even metal can withstand the pressure. As soon as the ship sinks, the sailors are stranded in the water miles from the closest shore and, once in the water, all of the sailors inevitably drown – the lucky ones at least. The unlucky ones are eaten by hideous creatures from the watery depths."

Looking at the wide eyes and rapt expressions of his audience, Sano smiled evilly. "I guess sea monsters like adding protein and a crunchy texture to their diets too."

"Sano!" Kaoru and Yahiko yelled in unison, double-teaming a cackling Sano until he was flat on his back and crying out for surrender.

After Kenshin rescued three teacups midair that had gotten kicked off of the porch, everyone calmed down again. The dishes were being returned to the kitchen and Kenshin was trying to figure out how to get Sano and Yahiko to do the cleanup so he could corner Kaoru that much sooner. He didn't hold out a lot of hope unless something drastic happened.

At this point he was almost tempted to flash his yellow eyes and growl to get them scrambling. No one else needed to know that it was lust and not anger that caused his eye color change. But no, he didn't want his friends to be afraid of him. He could be patient for a little while longer.

"Oi, runt," Sano grunted in Yahiko's direction. "Now's a good time."

"Good time for what?" rang out Kaoru's voice as she came in from the porch with the tea tray.

"For your surprise," smirked Sano.

Kenshin saw Kaoru's perplexed eyes jump to his face, but he didn't know what this was about either. Wait, could this have something to do with the reason Yahiko came running to the clinic to grab Sano this afternoon?

"Sit down and close your eyes, Kaoru," Yahiko instructed after she'd dropped off the dishes in the kitchen.

"Why?" she asked suspiciously. Considering the pranks those two played on each other, Kenshin couldn't entirely blame her.

"Just do it Jou-chan, or you'll ruin the surprise," came the order from Sano.

"Oh all right, but I depend on you," she said, pointing at Kenshin, "to defend me from anything underhanded." Though she sounded disgruntled, a smile kept breaking through the scowl she tried to pin on her face.

Kneeling down by the table, she closed her eyes and intertwined her fingers in her lap. As Yahiko entered the room again, Kenshin saw her tilt her head in the boy's direction. "I don't hear anything croaking or squeaking, so can I assume it isn't a slimy or furry surprise?"

An evil grin lifted Yahiko's lips and Kenshin felt a moment of worry. "If you'd stay like that for five more minutes I could go and find something," the boy offered.

"Absolutely not!" was her rapid reply as she started to rise up, but with her eyes still closed.

"Alright, alright," Yahiko placated. Holding out a mysterious bundle wrapped in a cloth of leaf green, Yahiko suddenly looked shy. "Okay, you can open your eyes now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hakama- The skirt-like pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. 
> 
> Dake- Only
> 
> Yukata- Light-weight and simple summer or sleeping kimono/robe
> 
> Shoji- Paper sliding door
> 
> Obi- The wide cloth wrapped around the waist of a kimono, often tied into an intricate bow at the back.
> 
> Jou-chan- "Little Missy," Sano's nickname for Kaoru
> 
> Oyasumi- Good night, more formally, "oyasumi-nasai"
> 
> Itadakimasu- Expression of gratitude before meals
> 
> Shinai- Bamboo practice sword
> 
> Maa maa- A placating interjection.
> 
> Tatami- Japanese mat/ straw floor coverings
> 
> Busu- Ugly hag/woman (very rude). Yahiko's nickname for Kaoru


	12. A Slip of the Tongue

" _Sit down and close your eyes, Kaoru," Yahiko instructed after she'd dropped off the dishes in the kitchen._

" _Why?" she asked suspiciously. Considering the pranks those two played on each other, Kenshin couldn't entirely blame her._

" _Just do it Jou-chan, or you'll ruin the surprise," came the order from Sano._

" _Oh all right, but I depend on you," she stated pointing at Kenshin, "to defend me from anything underhanded." Though she sounded disgruntled, a smile kept breaking through the scowl she tried to pin on her face. Kneeling down by the table, she closed her eyes and intertwined her fingers in her lap._

_Holding out a mysterious bundle wrapped in a cloth of leaf green, Yahiko suddenly looked shy. "Okay, you can open your eyes now."_

Fidgeting with excitement, Kaoru opened her eyes. Yahiko stood in front of her with a green package extended in his slightly trembling arms. _He looks nervous!_ With his boyish face creased with vulnerability, he also looked his age. It was so rare that she saw him in such a state that it almost broke her heart. Immediately she decided to act happy about this surprise, even if it killed her.

Smiling gently up at his anxious face, she took the soft green bundle. "Thank you, Yahiko."

Scuffing his feet against the tatami, Yahiko spoke in a slightly rough voice. "It's kinda stupid, so don't get too worked up. Sano helped with it too." He peeked up at her for a fleeting moment like an uncertain fawn. "You can open it now, if you want. You don't have to wait until later." His eyes returned to examining his worn tabi, "If you want."

Funnily enough, at his words she felt her own hands tremble for a second. _Come on now, no crying in front of the guys._ Blinking rapidly seemed to help.

"For crying out loud, just open the damn thing, Jou-chan," Sano griped. "This suspense is killing me."

Meeting Kenshin's soft lilac gaze, she felt the wave of his compassion and understanding flow over her mind. Calmed, she returned to her examination of the package. On closer inspection she saw that the cloth was interwoven in a pattern of variegated greens ranging from the color of rice shoots in the fields to the exact shade of pine needles in the spring. "Well, if nothing else the furoshiki is lovely," Kaoru offered happily.

At the sound of Sano's impatient sigh and Yahiko's fidgeting, she took pity on them and laid the package in front of her knees on the floor. Her fingers moved to the complex knot in the furoshiki. For a few moments it eluded her best efforts. _There was no need for Yahiko to tie it so tightly,_ she thought in frustration.

Finally, with a breathy exclamation of victory, she loosened the knot enough to spread the corners of the cloth out until they formed a flat square on the floor. The green now formed a frame for a folded piece of dark blue fabric. Rising up from her heels, she picked the blue garment up and shook it out. It made a sound of fluttering feathers as it unfurled.

_A hakama_.

_Oh dear,_ she thought with a sniff as her eyes filled with tears. It was the most beautiful blue hakama she had ever seen. Overcome with emotion, she didn't know what to say.

At her silence, Yahiko started babbling. "I noticed that your hakama have gotten really worn out and I know that with you trying to teach at other dojo, how ya' look is important. I'm sorry we couldn't afford a gi too, but even with Sano pitching in we could only cover the hakama, and it's used. But I was thinkin' that this way at least you don't have to sew it yourself. Sano lost most of his money gambling last weekend, the idiot, and I'm not very good at saving up money and-"

"Yahiko," she interrupted, "thank you. Hakama dake wa subarashii desu." Swallowing back happy tears, she reached out and embraced him in a one-armed hug. For a moment he leaned into her warm embrace. Then, remembering himself, he squirmed until she removed her arm and stopped endangering his manly pride with her girlish sentiment.

Cuddling her present to her chest she looked over at Sano. "You too, my friend. You guys are the best. I never expected-" choking up again, she had to pause.

"No, you're the best, Jou-chan," he offered with a gentle smile. The caring in his eyes gradually turned into a devilish gleam. "Now, where's my hug?" he demanded, glancing quickly at Kenshin from the corner his eye. "And maybe my kiss, since you aren't spoken for yet?" he continued, turning to her with puckered lips.

For a split second, a very SMALL split second, she wondered if his lips were as soft as they looked. _Would they feel that different from Kenshin's?_ Then her sanity returned, and she proceeded to beat him into the ground.

"Pervert!" she yelled, almost as angry about the thoughts he'd caused as his flirtatious words. She blamed her bad thoughts on her sensual awakening this afternoon. It had put possibilities into her head that she'd never acknowledged before. However, if she was lucky this new view of Sano would also be something she'd never have to acknowledge again. She didn't love Sano like _that_ , not like she loved Kenshin. _Nope, not gonna think such bad, weird thoughts ever again. Never ever._

In the midst of her beating, she heard Yahiko pretending to gag in disgust at the thought of kissing her. "I'd rather eat weevils!" the boy-who-was-about-to-get-bruised-if-he-didn't-shut-up exclaimed.

With all of this commotion she couldn't be blamed for only then noticing Kenshin's strangely tense form. He stood slightly behind Sano's twitching body. She could barely make out over Sano's groans and Yahiko's disgusted monologue the sound of his low-level growling. White fingers clenched and unclenched around the hilt of his sakabatou as he glared down at the white-clad man prone at her feet. Red bangs obscured his eyes, but she fearfully suspected just what color they'd be.

_Uh oh. I need to distract him, but how?_ She didn't think nibbling on his earlobe was a very good idea with Yahiko and Sano in the room, even if she was pretty certain it would work. _Maybe as a last resort?_ Unfortunately, a naughty part of her now hoped for things to get that drastic.

"I was only," Sano grunted as he uncurled from his fetal position, "kidding." Looking up into Kenshin's face he blanched. "Really, _really_ only kidding." Crab-walking backwards until he reached a wall, Sano used the support to lever himself to his feet. Weaving only slightly, he kept his eyes on a Kenshin who still radiated barely-leashed violence.

"I'm glad you enjoyed your surprise, Jou-chan. I'm going into town for a little while, but I'll probably be back later. Don't wait up." After delivering this announcement, Sano backed out onto the porch, only turning his back when he'd reached the gate.

Somehow, Yahiko had missed all of the byplay, too caught up in the cleverness of his speech. _Honestly, one moment they're boyish and adorable, the next they're insulting and begging for a beating._

"And even if I had sea monsters nibbling on my toes, I'd still not-," he continued through Sano's departure.

"Yahiko!" she growled. "We. Get. The. Idea. Now go clean up the kitchen." Grumbling at the unfairness of shihandai in specific and life in general, he stood up and stalked outside towards the well to get a bucket of water for washing. _Well, now that he was out of the way._

"Um, Kenshin?" she questioned softly, touching him hesitantly on the arm. At her touch, he released a long breath. She felt the muscles beneath her hand relax, dropping his fingers away from the hilt of his sword. As he relaxed so did she, grateful that the seeming crisis was over.

That's why she was so surprised when a moment later he grasped her around the waist and twirled her body around to crash into the wall. One hand cradled her head to protect it from knocking against the wood. Hidden from Yahiko's view, he pressed her flush against the wall and buried his nose behind her ear.

Through her own uneven breathing she heard him inhale deeply. His moist exhale ruffled the hair at her nape and raised goose bumps. Through the chest pressing into her own, she felt the vibrations of his rumbling purr. Trailing his nose back along her cheek, he brought his mouth a hair's breath from her own, "You can't leave me." Confused and on sensory overload, she could only stare into his blazing golden eyes as his breath pushed hotly against her sensitive lips.

"You're mine," he demanded, hovering above her lips. Wide-eyed, she wasn't sure how to respond to his sudden, blatant possessiveness. The marks were one thing, but this was totally outside of her experience.

And what did he mean by ' _don't leave me'_? He was the rurouni, not she. She could no more leave him than she could leave her art. Nothing short of death would make her abandon his side. _Wait, could it be that-_

Growling at her lack of response, he positioned one hand on her hip while the other spanned her throat. Tilting her head commandingly back, he fastened his lips over her own.

Like in the dojo, her body came to tingling life in the wake of his touch. While tangling her hands in the luxuriously soft hair flowing down his back, she tried to hold onto her previous thoughts. The hungry tongue tracing the seam of her lips didn't help. When a moan escaped her mouth, he surged past her lips and ravaged her mouth with a raw and all-consuming passion. Weak in the knees, she relied upon his body pressing hers against the wall to keep her from falling. Hazily she wondered if they'd ever get a chance to start and finish a kiss in the middle of a room instead of against a wall. _Not that I'm complaining._

Ripping his mouth away, he slid his lips along her cheek until he reached the sensitive shell of her ear. Just feeling his moist breath puffing along the wet trail left on her skin made her ache to writhe against his body.

"Say it, Kaoru," he roughly whispered.

_Say what?_

Still confused, as well as out of breath from his kisses, she closed her eyes and tried to order her thoughts. _Now, what was I thinking about? Nothing short of death? But that's how he lost his wife, isn't it._

_Tomoe may have betrayed him, but she did repent of it in the end by trying to shield him with her own body. The fact that he was too wounded to recognize her in time to halt his attack was a cruel accident. Yet I know I haven't even scratched the surface of how that affected him._

_Perhaps he somehow thinks that by admitting he loves me it curses me to the same fate? Or does he think that I too might betray him? No, he has to know me better than that._

Distracted by her thoughts, Kaoru was completely blindsided by his next action. Before she knew quite how it had happened, she found both of her hands extricated from his hair and restrained above her head. Instinctively she struggled. His hold made her realize just how large his hands really were compared to her own. Both of her wrists fit comfortably inside the palm and fingers of one of his hands. Looking at the fevered golden light burning deep in his eyes, she knew that some strong emotion held him in its grip.

Biting her lip, Kaoru reminded herself that Kenshin would never hurt her. This was still the complex man she loved, even if his actions right now confused and maybe even scared her a little bit. There were a few moves she could pull that she thought would hurt him or break his grip, even restrained as she was. However, his grip wasn't painful, just firm. Kaoru would trust him until he did something to prove that her trust was misplaced.

When he felt her body relax slightly, his other hand slid slowly down the outside of her body from her wrist to her waist, leaving a tingling wake where the pads of his fingers traveled, especially when they brushed against the sensitive side of her breast. Sighing, Kaoru allowed her body to become pliant in his hands. As if her surrender had somehow answered part of his question, she felt part of the tension in his body dissipate.

As his talented lips nibbled on the edge of her ear, the fingers capturing her wrists became limp. Quickly twisting her arms apart, she placed her freed hands on his shoulders. His only response was to gently nip her earlobe in chastisement. However, at the same time the hand on her waist squeezed soothingly before slipping down and back caressingly, massaging the flesh along the way.

Tilting her head back, she purred in pleasure. The movement of his velvet mouth sliding up and down her skin caused his smooth auburn hair to brush softly against the side of her face like a silken caress. _He has hair the envy of a palace concubine. I wonder what he'd say if I told him?_

A foolish smile trembled on the edge of her lips, but was quickly forgotten when the hand on her bottom tilted her hips minutely, increasing the friction with his own. Kaoru had to bite her bottom lip to stifle her moans of pleasure. His lips trailed down her neck tantalizingly before licking back up the line of her jaw, pausing to nip her lightly on the chin.

"You're mine. Now say it," commanded his husky voice again, but this time she caught the underlying hint of vulnerability. That hint crushed any half-formed plans she might have had about keeping quiet until he revealed just what he was thinking.

_You silly, stupid, lovable man._

Before she could finally formulate a reply, his mouth returned to her own. Dominantly thrusting his tongue into her mouth, she met his advance fiercely with her own. As their tongues rubbed back and forth, she couldn't suppress the hungry moans caused by the actions of his hand and mouth.

If the fit of her kimono had allowed it, she would have widened her stance so that his body could press even closer. But with her legs restrained by clothing and her hands restrained by him, all she could do was rub against him with her hips and mouth. Yet her attempts to increase the delicious friction seemed to affect Kenshin quite well, because as soon as she undulated he groaned gutturally into her mouth and forcefully deepened their kiss.

The thump of a bucket in the kitchen managed to finally penetrate their haze. Thankfully, Yahiko had used the kitchen entrance to return; he hadn't seen them. After a few more moments of softening kisses, their lips finally broke reluctantly apart. However, Kenshin was staring at her expectantly, the feverish light in his eyes more subdued but still present.

"I'm yours, Kenshin," she finally huffed out on a disbelieving laugh. "My love, of course I'm yours. I'm not going anywhere."

"I love you," replied Kenshin in a voice overflowing with intensity. Then, giving her nose a soft, loving kiss, he released her wrists and stepped back. Meeting her eyes again, he whispered, "Mine."

_Yes, she was his. But he was hers too._ Smiling, she gave him a small nod.

Grinning roguishly, Kenshin spun around and sauntered into the kitchen. She would have recovered a lot quicker if he hadn't smiled at her like that. _Oh… my. That was strange. And interesting,_ she thought as she raised a trembling hand to her passion bruised she heard the sound of Yahiko's voice echoing out from the kitchen, she finally managed to rouse herself enough to retreat to her room.

While the storm had broken the drought and moderated temperatures, the night was still warm. Kenshin could hear insects chirping, frogs croaking, and fleeing prey rustling through damp foliage out in the night. Keenly staring out into the darkness, he caught no sign of anything unusual to disturb the peace of his home.

While he'd been doing the dishes earlier, Yahiko had been too hyped up by his successful surprise to notice anything unusual. He'd taken advantage of that fact to turn away from the glowing boy and plunge his hands into soapy water. Cleaning had always served as a great distraction and method for calming his mind. As long as Kenshin replied occasionally with an encouraging sound, the boy was content to prattle on happily.

Kenshin was so proud of him. Kaoru really did deserve more happy surprises in her life. It comforted him to know that Yahiko and Sano really did appreciate all she did for them. So often they didn't show it, but he knew that this night would stay in her heart for years to come.

It was ridiculously simple to make her happy; it shamed him that they all didn't try more often. Sometimes he would get complacent in his actions, thinking that he was making her life better with his simple chores and words.

But then he would notice her dragging footsteps at the end of the day artificially pick up when she heard someone approaching. He hated it when she returned from town with bruised eyes hiding behind a smiling façade. It made him feel helpless. So often he didn't know what to do to make it better, especially when she refused to burden him with the truth of her problems.

She probably thought her silence made things easier for him, but it didn't. He could read the truth in her eyes, and it just made his job of protecting her even more difficult. The situation inspired him to renew his efforts to be polite and friendly to everyone he met; whenever he ventured into town he always tried to recruit as many allies for her as he could. His theory was that they might be able to help where he could not.

At least she now had one less thing to worry about: she knew that he loved her. He hadn't realized how his conflicting emotions had eaten away at her contentment, but no more. It would be his life's joy to make her feel cherished.

Continuing his nightly prowl around the dojo, he made sure that all of the entrances were secure and that everyone was safe in their beds. Hearing Yahiko's light snores brought a fond smile to his face over the innocence of youth. Sano had returned a little while ago and now sat on the porch outside drinking from a bottle of sake he must have bought while in town. Making Sano aware of his presence by coming out of the shadows with a little wave, he continued on. As for Kaoru, Kenshin liked to save her room for last.

Gliding silently through the moonlit courtyard, he rounded the silvered pine trees standing sentinel outside of her room. The air hummed with insects singing their incessant songs, punctuated occasionally by the lone hoot of an owl and the rustle of its' windswept wings. Finally catching sight of the candlelight radiating from her room, he had to pause as he felt sweat break out on his forehead. Whether it was caused by the heat or the picturesque scene, however, he couldn't say.

Like Sano, Kaoru sat outside her room on the porch. The moonlight streamed down through the moist air in opalescent ribbons, twining around her supple body where she sat curled with her arms locked around her bare knees. In a very pleasant reversal from this afternoon, she seemed to be wearing only a slashed up blue gi. A very familiar blue gi.

_Mine_ , he thought with an exquisite pleasure so sharp it bordered on animalistic. With her face tipped up towards the few pockets of stars shining though the veil of pale clouds, she looked pure and untouched by the evils of the world. Tilted up as it was, her face was perfectly positioned for a worshipful kiss.

Together, the uneven lighting of candle and moonlight cast half her body in muted shadow while emphasizing the other half's dips and curves through the thin fabric of his worn gi. The night shadowed her eyes, but left unhidden the curve of her cheek and the hollow at the base of her throat. Her slender fingers dangled by a pair of trim ankles topped by lightly muscled calves that he'd love to circle with his fingers. The skin of her long legs seemed painted by flickering shadows beckoning him closer, daring him to explore the secrets of her silken limbs.

When he'd first seen her moon-kissed form, he'd frozen in place as if under an enchantress's spell. But after this afternoon, things were different. He didn't have to force himself to leave and pretend he hadn't seen this glimpse of perfection.

Besides, they needed to talk. After their last encounter he was afraid that he might have scared Kaoru with his actions. He hadn't meant to be so aggressive or so possessive. Kenshin knew he could trust Kaoru, could even trust Sano.

It was just that he had finally admitted out loud how vulnerable he was because of her. He had hoped that the jagged fear of losing her, of suffering that agony again would be soothed after their mutual pledging of love. But he'd been wrong. His fears, rational and irrational, had swamped his mind earlier tonight. If he wasn't careful, he'd drive her away himself with his actions.

Kenshin had loved Kaoru for a very long time. Part of that love was, he admitted to himself, interwoven with some very primitive male instincts. Deep down he did want to possess her - possess her in every way possible so that she was kept safe and happy and _his_. Right now, however, he wanted to show her the other side to his love. He wanted Kaoru to see that his love could be gentle too.

About to glide forward, he heard a soft scuffle sound behind him. Closing his eyes in an agony of frustration, Kenshin lifted his foot up and stepped quite firmly on a dry branch. At the sharp – _crack-_ echoing into the night, Kaoru'shead shot in his direction and she scrambled to her feet. Retreating inside, the _–shush-_ of her closing shoji immediately followed. Through the rice paper he saw her feminine silhouette momentarily bend over a burning candle before her room went dark.

Feeling the sake burn down his throat, Sano swallowed and let out a sigh of contentment. Traveling was fun, but somewhere along the way these people had come to mean home to him. His place on Ruffian's Row was long gone, and Sano liked having somewhere to come back to where he knew he'd be welcomed. He was happy with his life; well, mostly happy considering he didn't have a warm woman or a fat wallet. Nevertheless, he wanted his friends to be happy too. Hopefully, it looked like one of them had finally gotten his act together and finally decided to pull his head out of his-

Seeing Kenshin standing frozen across the courtyard staring towards Kaoru's room, Sano decided to pry his limp body up and stroll over to have a little talk with his red-headed friend. While he wasn't drunk, he'd taken a little, actually quite a lot, of liquid courage to help steady his resolve for what he was about to do. Standing up, he ambled over to where his friend stood.

Along the way he carefully aimed before kicking a small rock towards the gate. His first kick whooshed through the air and hit… air. _That's okay, that one was just practice._ Tilting his head and squinting, he managed to actually swipe the rock this time. It wobbled forward in an awkward limp for a few moments before fetching up against the nearest tree. _There's probably a lesson in that._ _Hell if I know what it is, though._

"Hey, Kenshin, nice night isn't it," Sano offered. For some reason, Kenshin had just stepped quite loudly on a stick. Maybe he couldn't kick tonight either.

Kenshin turned and took a few steps towards Sano, but his face remained in shadow. A little uneasy at his silence, especially after dinner, but determined not to show it, Sano clutched his sake jug more firmly in one hand. "Everything secure around the dojo, or is there something I should know about?" Keeping his voice friendly and calm during his enquiry was a challenge, but he succeeded.

Shifting so that the moonlight finally illuminated part of his face, Kenshin replied. "No, everything is fine." Something seemed to forcefully relax in his features as he finished, "that it is."

"Um, good, good, glad to hear it." At a bit of a loss as to what to say next, Sano decided to just jump into it feet first.

"Look, Kaoru is like a feisty little sister to me, or maybe a best female friend, or even like an ex-girlfriend, except that I respect her and we haven't had sex ye-," seeing the rapid, and frightening, darkening of Kenshin's features, Sano decided to try and define the relationship at a different time. Would he believe that it was just a slip of the tongue? Then again, mentioning Kaoru and tongue right now would probably just make things worse. _How_ does _he loom like that when he's so short?_

Clearing his throat Sano continued, "Anyway, my point is that I care for Jou-chan a lot and want her to be happy. She deserves the best, and that includes a man who treats her _properly_ and _honorably._ " Guilt joined the anger shifting beneath Kenshin's features, but still he didn't say anything. If Sano hadn't known Kenshin as well as he did, he wouldn't have been able to read even that much. _Fine, if he wants to play it that way._

"Since I don't know how much longer I'll be around, I'm depending on you to make sure any man she falls for offers marriage and not just a roll in the hay. Jou-chan's not just some strumpet on the street; she deserves better than that, not to mention the gossip that would follow."

The silence after his words seemed to echo with everything he hadn't said but intended. Finally, Kenshin looked him straight in the eye and steadily replied, "I know." Nothing more, but it was enough.

Satisfied that he'd planted his seed into fertile soil, Sano stood up. "Well, I'm off to bed. Have to get a good night's sleep if I'm to match wits with the Fox again tomorrow. Oyasumi." Arms folded behind his head, sake jug dangling from one finger, Sano strolled off to his futon and a well deserved rest.

 (Revisit Under the Moon by Jade-Lightning-Wolf)

* * *

 

_OMAKE_ by Shirou Shinjin, who owns my soul for writing this in a review. Love love love!

  
Gentle knocking woke Kaoru up from the most delicious sleep she'd experienced in a very long time. Burrowing her nose deeper into the fabric covering Kenshin's arm, she inhaled contentedly. The staccato knocking came again, this time a little louder.

Pouting at the disturbance of her comfortable nook she demanded, "Kenshin, tell them to go away." At least that's what she intended to say. Refusing to lift her face from its happy place, what actually came out was a mumbled mishmash of, "Kenshi, tem go 'way." A few moments of blessed silence followed. Rubbing her nose against his arm affectionately, she started to drift back to sleep.

"Kenshin? Is there something going on between you two?" asked a distinctly non-Kenshin voice. Kaoru's head shot up as she looked into a pair of angry brown eyes, spiky brown hair and a red headband. "Don't you love me, baby?"

"Agh!"

Gentle knocking woke Kaoru up from the most disturbing dream she'd experienced in a very long time. Burrowing her nose deeper into the fabric covering Kenshin's arm, she inhaled somewhat unsteadily. The staccato knocking came again, this time a little louder.

Pouting at the slight migraine that she was developing she demanded, "Go away." She heard Kenshin rise from beside her, and pad over to the shoji. Then, she heard the rasp of metal against metal as a sword was drawn. This was followed by the distinct sound of someone destroying a door.

She looked up blearily from the covers into a pair of golden eyes set below slicked-back black hair, and a long sword slowly being pointed at her.

"You've been a very bad girl, tanuki. Aku. Soku. Zan."

"Agh!"

The loud pounding on the inside of her skull mercifully woke Kaoru from the most distressing nightmare she had ever had the misfortune to experience. Wishing with all her might the string of bad dreams was over, she burrowed her nose deeper into the fabric covering Kenshin's arm, and inhaled cautiously. The painful banging subsided into a more tolerable knocking.

With an almost palpable air of trepidation, she quietly spoke to the figure beside her, "Kenshin, tell them to go away." To her immense relief, she heard the soft tones of her beloved rurouni answer her with a gentle, "Hai, Kaoru-koishii."

With that, he rose from beside her and made his way over to the door. As he began opening the shoji to shoo Sano or Yahiko or whoever it was that had disturbed her, Kaoru glanced across the futon where her Kenshin was moments ago...

...into deep, soulful black eyes, long raven hair, and pale flawless skin. And a large red wound running from shoulder to hip. "Anata, could you get me some tea?"

"Hai, Tomoe-koishii."

"Agh!"

Kaoru's senses returned to her long before her sight did. The knocking came again. This time, she wasn't taking any chances. Raising her balled fist, she soundly clubbed herself back into oblivion, not wanting to know who she was going to wake up next to this time.

Kenshin, meanwhile, was utterly confused as to why his Kaoru suddenly beat herself over the head just as she was waking up. Ever since he'd found her napping with his gi wrapped in her arms, he'd hoped to have her awaken to him filling her vision so he could surprise her, and maybe taste those sumptuous lips again.

Unfortunately, he really did need to start dinner. He waited until Yahiko had given up on waking Kaoru, and snuck back into the kitchen...

THE END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hakama- The skirt or baggy pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. (Thanks for the clarification from Kathryn Angelle.)
> 
> Dake- Only, just
> 
> Furoshiki- Cloth wrapping or covering (instead of wrapping paper)
> 
> Hakama dake wa subarashii desu- Only/just hakama is wonderful/magnificent.
> 
> Yukata- Light-weight and simple summer or sleeping kimono/robe
> 
> Shoji- Paper sliding door
> 
> Obi- The wide cloth wrapped around the waist of a kimono, often tied into an intricate bow at the back.
> 
> Jou-chan- "Little Missy," Sano's nickname for Kaoru
> 
> Oyasumi- Good night, more formally, "oyasumi-nasai"
> 
> Tatami- Japanese mat/ straw floor coverings
> 
> Tabi- Japanese socks with split toe
> 
> Sakabatou- Kenshin's reverse blade sword
> 
> Shihandai- Assistant instructor, Kaoru's title
> 
> Rurouni- Wanderer
> 
> My take on Sano and Kaoru's relationship. Like Sano said, they are best friends in an almost sibling-like relationship, but if the shadow of Kenshin hadn't been there they might have been something more. Only might, but we'll never know, because Kenshin was there first and Kaoru fell for him first. So Sano is friend and brother. Is Sano one of those guys who have trouble being just friends with a girl? Nah, he isn't that intense. I think he's more laid back, though he does wanna get laid. Basically Sano was just trying to pull Kenshin's leg. Also, like Sano alluded to, he may not have great morals or have any problems with loose women, but he actually respects Kaoru so he sees her differently. That's why I don't see his words as hypocritical, though Kenshin could try and call him on it if he wanted to.


	13. A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes

The trilling flutes from the grand celebration in her dream suddenly became birdsong when Kaoru woke up that morning. Golden light pressed against her eyelids, turning her vision red. Blindly questing fingers finally found the covers and pulled them over her head, blocking out the morning light.

Scrunching her face back into her pillow, Kaoru tried to return to her dream world. While the exact details of her identity in the dream had slipped through her fingers like a handful of beads, she remembered enough of the beauty and excitement to want to desperately continue the story.

The few gems of memory she retained from her dream evolved around a gathering held in a large wooden hall bedecked in gauzy silks of jeweled tones – the sapphire, emerald, and pearl fabrics draping over the dark patina of the walls. Obscuring the corners and edges with their flow, they undulated in the soothing breeze blowing gently through the open doors and windows. Drifting hazily on the brink of returning to sleep, Kaoru remembered that being in that room had made her think of the legends about people going deep beneath the ocean to the palace of the sea goddess where the water dragons dwelled.

All of the events from before she came to be in that fabric-draped room had been forgotten, so Kaoru couldn't remember why Hanaike-san, the friendly flower seller she liked to chat with in the market, was sitting in the back of the room on a huge wooden ship scattering rice and flower petals down onto the people gathering below. If Ishida-san could see her now, he'd be forced to retract his statement about weak females. Kaoru could see grains of rice almost all of the way up to the front door, a testament to the strength of the woman's throws.

On a tiered dais in the center of the room Kaoru's dream-self knelt upon a velvet and silk cushion. More cushions rested around the circumference of the dais, ready to cradle her reclining body or the body of an invited guest. Two lower tiers also held cushions, but many of those were already occupied. Who she was and why she was there had been explained earlier in the dream, but the details dissipated like smoke when she tried to hold onto them.

Five men in an alcove to her left caressed their instruments with talented fingers, filling the hall with gentle melodies, hauntingly beautiful. The most gifted musicians in the kingdom, they had been instructed to play cheerful tunes later on in the day once everyone had arrived. However, for now their gentle songs helped to sooth her impatience. Nothing could completely quash her anticipation, but at least she wasn't fidgeting.

While she waited, two women and a man holding several bejewel casks approached her and silently requested permission to ascend. Tilting her head, she granted them access to her person. She knew what they wanted, or at least her dream self did.

Opening the casks, the trio unearthed a vast assortment of jewels and ornaments. It was all she could do not to coo at their beauty. Gentle hands began adorning her body with rings, bracelets, necklaces, and combs. All of the ornaments were golden in tone, either brightly polished wood or shiny metal, and flecked with garnets, amethysts, and pearls both ivory and black. After inserting the last cherry wood comb into her elaborately styled hair, the trio packed up their jewelry casks, bowed, and retreated out of the room. To her dream self the selection had seemed random, but in reminiscing Kaoru saw how each piece of jewelry was chosen to honor one man in particular.

As if the departure of her servants had been a signal, the room rapidly filled with a rainbow of gentlemen and ladies wearing intricately layered kimono in the most sophisticated of styles. The fluid movement of the iridescent lords and ladies through the crowd seemed like a complex dance. Different entourages would interlace momentarily, greet one another, and then instantly separate like two opposing schools of fish scenting food in opposite directions.

Near the back of the room she spotted Sano conversing with her mother. Even though Kaoru's mother had died many years ago, every detail was crystal clear – from her favorite sea-green kimono down to the small brown mole beneath her left ear. During their conversation, Sano kept holding out his hand to catch the rice Hanaike-san was throwing from her perch on the wooden ship. After catching a few grains, he would offer some to her mother before popping the rest into his mouth and chewing enthusiastically. Sano really needed to learn how to breathe through his nose.

After they'd finished chewing and swallowing, she saw her mother smile lovingly and point in her direction. Kaoru could make out the words 'daughter,' 'beautiful,' and 'mare,' though why her mother would be talking about horses with Sano escaped her. As more people filled the room she lost sight of them. Sound in the room surged and ebbed with the movements of the crowd and served as a counterpoint to the now frolicking music.

Although she looked tranquil and composed on her cushion, inside she wanted to leap up and twirl around the room searching for the object of her anticipation. Looking over at the man kneeling directly below her platform, she noticed that he was dressed in an under-kimono of darkest blue covered by a kimono of pale yellow and dark gold. Two kodachi rested unsheathed on a white silk cushion by his side, glinting menacingly in the light of the sun shining through the high windows as a warning to any who might think to do her harm. His hair was tied back in a complex knot that served to emphasize his patrician features.

Catching his eye, she subtly tilted her head and flicked her fingers. At her actions a faint twinkle sparkled in his eyes and caused the corners to crease infinitesimally. To everyone else in the room his face likely remained an expressionless mask, but to Kaoru it felt like she'd received an affectionate and conspiratorial grin. Standing up, he clapped his hands twice, bringing instant silence to the room.

Kaoru was so lost in her recollection of the dream that it almost physically jarred her body when she realized that the bodyguard in her dream was Aoshi. She was so used to seeing Aoshi with long bangs that she hadn't realized how sculpted his cheekbones were. Eyes still closed against her pillow, she felt a smile forming on her lips. Making a mental note to mention in her next letter to Misao the possible benefits of hair ties as gifts to broody spymasters, Kaoru turned over and returned to the delightful memory of her dream.

All Kaoru could hear from her position on the dais was the flapping of the fabric along the walls and the soft shuffling of feet. A space formed in front of the dais where Kaoru sat, and one by one clan representatives came to the base and placed their offerings. She addressed them all by name and delivered a few personal words at each gift. Proud of her memory and seeming-serenity, she only hoped that no one could see the impatient tapping of her fingers hidden beneath the sleeve of her elaborate kimono.

Finally the moment she had been waiting for arrived. The second-to-last gift was given and a current of whispers rushed through the room. Kaoru sat up straighter. A young boy holding a scarlet umbrella at a slant trotted into the empty space in front of her platform. It obscured his face and the face of two men following close behind him. Unlike the boy their movements seemed relaxed and fluid, although no less swift.

Suddenly the youth stopped and tipped his umbrella up, revealing Yahiko's familiar face. "You can open it now, if you want. You don't have to wait until later," he declared. Closing the scarlet umbrella with brisk efficiency, he started walking around her tiered dais to the back of the room. As she twisted around to follow his progress, he paused one last time to speak over his shoulder, "If you want." Then he took a running jump onto the deck of the wooden ship in the back of the room and settled down next to Hanaike-san and her pots of flower petals and rice.

Turning back to the front of the room in bewilderment, Kaoru saw for the first time the two men that had been hidden behind Yahiko's umbrella. The first was a formidable giant of a man. His massive shoulders and chest were covered by his layered kimono of white and vermillion. Going down onto his knees, the immense strength he restrained was apparent in every glide and shift of his muscles. Like with Aoshi, it took her waking mind to distinguish his identity. Distantly she recognized him as Hiko Seijurō, the man who'd taught Kenshin the Hiten Mitsurugi-Ryū.

Flaring his long black hair back behind his shoulders with an arrogant toss of his head, he gave a short but respectful obeisance. In his hair Kaoru could see a few purple petals trapped in the raven strands. He must have walked below Hanaike-san sometime during the party. Straightening up from his bow, he began to speak in a deep, rolling voice, "To symbolize the union of our two honorable clans and demonstrate our loyalty to your clan's leadership, we are giving you our most valuable asset: our clan's best warrior."

Sound in the room momentarily surged as the crowd exclaimed over his words. A smirk formed on his sculpted lips as he continued, "To clarify, I should have said our most skilled warrior outside of the Daimyō himself. As much as you would have enjoyed having me by your side, it was regretfully decided that I could not be released from the responsibilities of the clan. Nevertheless," he paused to flick his hair back over his shoulder again, "the warrior we have chosen will not disappoint you."

Nonplussed, Kaoru was at a bit of a loss as to how she should reply to his arrogance. Or to the many feminine sighs of relief. Luckily, her father chose that moment to step forward and rescue her. He stood straight and tall in his formal golden robes, hand-painted with bamboo shoots and flying cranes. The streaks of silver threading his black hair added to his distinguished aura of authority.

"We are flattered by your clan's careful consideration. Truly the gifting of such a skilled warrior shows our clan great honor and loyalty," her father intoned.

Kaoru tried to listen closely as her father continued his speech, tried to note his words and the dear cadences of his voice for consideration later, but her hearing kept going in and out as she fought the compulsion to stare at the second figure kneeling behind the Daimyō.

Compared to Lord Seijurō this man was slight. However, in his masculine bearing Kaoru detected the same feeling of restrained power. He was also dressed in layered kimono of white and red, but across the white sleeves of his outermost kimono the vermillion diffused across the garment until the dark red became a soft mist of rose. The kimono disappeared into the formal black hakama covering the lower half of his body. A strand of his unique red-gold hair reflected the sunlight and glistened like fire where it curled over his shoulder like a beloved pet.

The picture he made seemed almost too beautiful to be real, and Kaoru found herself thinking that she had never seen anything more lovely. Even though he knelt many body-lengths away, Kaoru had to curl her hands into fists to keep from trying to reach out and touch the man to prove she wasn't imagining him.

Muscles beneath the pale fabric of his kimono rippled as his head and shoulders shifted slightly. She thought he might be staring at her, equally enraptured, but couldn't be entirely sure because his face was concealed. A golden veil bordered by tiny bells covered his head from crown to collar. Insanely curious, she tried not to chew on her lower lip as she pondered just what he might look like. For some reason, she felt an inexplicable magnetic pull towards this young warrior. Discomposed, she missed the end of Lord Seijurō's speech completely.

However, his opening words and the signs all pointed to one explanation. Truly, this clan had proved that they honored her above all others. They were a proud and formidable people renowned across the country for their lethal prowess. The gift of a great warrior would have been valuable enough, but by giving this man to her veiled, they declared him blind – blind to any previous promises or ties. When that veil came off, he would pledge his honor, loyalty, and life to the lord in front of him or, in this case, to the lady.

He would belong to her – body and soul. What she commanded, he would do without question. If she so ordered, he would destroy the very clan that had relinquished him. By giving her their greatest warrior save their ruling lord, this clan put themselves at risk. They also unquestioningly pledged their trust and unswerving loyalty. Anything within this man's power was hers for the asking: from guarding her room to washing her hundreds of clothes or even cooking her meals. Or warming her bed.

Of course, she could guess what it was that the Daimyō hoped to gain by this lavish offering. He wanted her to take the warrior to her bed. But not for a lover's tryst, oh no, he wanted a man of his clan's blood as her husband. It was a gamble, but promised great rewards. While this warrior could not be seen to show any favoritism, a child of their union would not be so restrained. Nothing would be suspicious about a child wanting to please his uncles and cousins.

Strangely, figuring out the hidden meaning in this gift didn't raise her usual indignation at manipulation. Instead, she felt intrigued. She wondered how this man with his dark red hair would look ensconced in her feminine chambers.

Clearing her throat softly, Kaoru fought to keep a blush off of her cheeks at her wayward thoughts. Seeing her father's expectant stare, she realized that the court was still waiting for her reply. Opening her mouth, she somehow managed to gracefully accept the compelling warrior into her service. Whether she'd accepted him as servant, bodyguard, or husband, however, was still undecided.

While she debated in her mind, the party resumed. Servants circulated with chilled wine and fruit juices as the musicians began to play once again. The need to see his face was an ache in her chest, a need that should only be a want for someone of her position. Even realizing the possible political ramifications, she feared she wouldn't be able to resist.

Feeling something hit the back of her neck, she turned around with a frown. Yahiko stood leaning over the railing of the ship in the back of the room. Cocking his arm back he flung another handful of rice, pelting her again, this time on the cheek and neck.

"Hey!" she exclaimed in annoyance, wishing she had something besides cushions to fling back at him. Remembering her fan, she felt her eyes light up in glee, but right after she pulled it from her obi he shouted something at her. Over the noise of the crowd, she couldn't make it out. She saw him roll his eyes and let out a very put-upon sigh upon seeing her incomprehension.

The second time Yahiko yelled, he did it very slowly, with exaggerated mouth movements. While she still couldn't hear him, this time she could read his lips. Curiously, it was the same thing he'd said earlier, "You can open it now, if you want." Still feeling just as confused as the first time he'd said that, she rolled her eyes back at him and then untwisted to face forward.

While she'd been distracted by the rain of rice, her red-headed warrior had ascended the dais. Startled, she snapped her fan open in an attempt to regain her composure. His movements were fluid and unthreatening as he settled on a cushion nearby, yet from the faint frown and white knuckled grip her dark-haired protector kept on his twin swords, she suspected that this man could burst into movement in the blink of an eye. Curiously, she noticed that the warrior had paused a moment before sitting down, deliberately, with his back to those naked swords. Was it arrogance, blind faith, or a bid to win her trust and prove his new loyalty by baring his back to her bodyguard's swords?

Closing her fan slowly, spoke by spoke, Kaoru looked out over the crowded room of lords and ladies circulating like rainbow-scaled fish amidst the waves of billowing silk. When she felt suitably composed, she turned to the graceful man sitting across from her. She still didn't even know his name, although it could have been mentioned during her preoccupation. Still, there was no time like the present. Besides, Yahiko had said she could open it now. Hiding a smile, Kaoru was determined to sate as much of her curiosity as she could in such a public forum.

"May I know the name and face of the man I've taken as my own?" she asked. Her question had come out worded more personally than she had intended, but it was too late to change it now.

He let the tinkling of the small, beaten-gold bells lining his veil answer for him as he inclined his head. Kaoru wondered if it was the noise of the crowd or his own grace that had kept her from hearing their music before now. Through the translucent golden fabric she could faintly see the glint of an eye and the shadow of his lips. Calloused fingers bearing the pattern of someone well versed in the use of a blade lightly grasped the edge of the veil and slowly began to lift. His neck appeared first, a smooth span of sun-kissed skin. Clutching her fan in a white-knuckled grip, she attempted to keep her face poised.

The progress of his fingers suddenly halted as he spoke for the first time, "Perhaps we should wait for our drinks." His voice sounded smooth and warm, the kind of voice she'd imagined whispering into her ear on cold nights.

"They're already here," she replied, gesturing with her fan to the three cups suddenly sitting between them along with the small carafe of sake. She didn't stop to wonder where they had come from.

"You need to take your veil off if you are going to drink," she said as she slipped her fan back into her obi and then poured sake into each of the three cups, from smallest to largest. "Don't forget to take a sip from each," she reminded him, though as with the cups the words simply spouted from her lips without her stopping to wonder where they had come from.

The bells softly chimed as he grasped the veil once again and began to lift. "Now we will be together forever, my wife." As the flautist's melody soared above the crowd, the veil passed his chin and revealed a hint of red as a sultry lower lip finally came into view.

Vaguely she realized that the san-san-kudo, or drinking from the three sake cups three times, meant that they were about to be married. Or had they already drank? His words implied that they had. Too caught up in the mystery of his face, she decided to think about it later. Holding her breath in anticipation… Kaoru had woken up to birdsong.

Now she lay underneath her blanket, trying to recapture that magical moment. But in the time it took to recall her dream, it had become uncomfortably hot beneath the blanket. Her legs felt sweaty and it was hard to breath. Instead of continuing on from that moment in her dreams, her mind kept returning to her body's discomfort. No matter how she wiggled and willed her mind to sleep, she couldn't get her dream man to lift the veil past his lips. Exasperated, she finally gave up and flung the covers off.

Even though she hadn't gotten to see the face of the man she was marrying, or had married, or whatever had happened there right before she woke up, she knew that it was Kenshin. She had dreamed of marrying Kenshin before, and this was just one more permutation on the theme. Still, it had been nice to have her dead parents there, and exciting, what with the mystery of his identity. Even though she knew now who he was, she hadn't known then. It would have been fun to have her dream self make that wonderful discovery. Plus, she never had figured out why Hanaike-san was throwing rice off of a big boat in the back of the room, though Sano's story from the night before probably had something to do with it.

Oh well, at least the cooler morning air caressing her body felt wonderful. In fact, after a great dream like that the only thing less than stellar was the loud birdsong right next to her head.

Opening her eyes, she stretched out her arm and, grunting slightly, cracked open the nearest shoji. As it opened, Kaoru saw the singing brown sparrow that had woken her from her dreams flutter his wings and puff out the fluffy feathers on his chest. "Cuteness only buys you so much this early in the morning," she scowled. What was it with annoying sparrows lately? First yesterday and now this morning.

Wait, yesterday… Kenshin!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dictionary:  
> Hakama- The skirt or baggy pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. (Thanks for the clarification from Kathryn Angelle.)
> 
> Dake- Only, just
> 
> Yukata- Light-weight and simple summer or sleeping kimono/robe
> 
> Shoji- Paper sliding door
> 
> Obi- The wide cloth wrapped around the waist of a kimono, often tied into an intricate bow at the back.
> 
> Hiten Mitsurugi-Ryū- The name of the sword style Kenshin and Hiko use.
> 
> Daimyō- clan leader
> 
> Shihandai- Assistant instructor, Kaoru's title
> 
> San-san-kudo- Literally "The way of 3-3-9," or more loosely, 'the ceremony of the three times three exchange.' During a Shinto wedding ceremony, the couple exchange sacred sake poured into three cups in different sizes; one large, one medium, and one small. They each take three sips from each cup, three times (three being a sacred number). After this ritual, a couple is considered married.


	14. Satisfying Those Urges

_Opening her eyes, she stretched out her arm and, grunting slightly, cracked open the nearest shoji. As it opened, Kaoru saw the singing brown sparrow that had woken her from her dreams flutter his wings and puff out the fluffy feathers on his chest. "Cuteness only buys you so much this early in the morning," she scowled. What was it with annoying sparrows lately? First yesterday and now this morning._

_Wait, yesterday… Kenshin!_ Sitting up rapidly in shock, Kaoru felt all of the blood rush from her head. Groaning, she flopped back down.

Then, smiling dreamily, she happily replayed the events of the previous day. _I kissed Kenshin! He said he loved me! And Yahiko and Sano got me a new hakama!_ Okay, so it was a slightly used hakama, but still much better than her old one, not to mention a gift!

After that Kenshin had kissed her again, though it was a lot darker than all of their previous kisses. Definitely a delicious and shiver-inducing interlude, but darker and slightly strange. What had been driving his suddenly possessive behavior was unclear, but she suspected the trauma of losing his wife still haunted him. Or perhaps it stemmed all the way back to when he'd first been orphaned as a child, sold into slavery, and then orphaned again when his fellow slaves were killed before his eyes.

That or it was a male thing again. _Maybe he just doesn't like to share?_ After all, he didn't have many possessions. When people touched his bag or his sakabatou uninvited, she'd seen that little crinkle between his eyes that meant he was unhappy and trying to hide it. Of course, he never seemed to mind when she touched his sword.

Whatever the case may be, Kaoru hoped that Kenshin would be willing to tell her of his fears. However, she suspected that he would try to keep them to himself. There were so many things about his past and his inner turmoil that he was reticent to speak about. Much of what she knew came from closely watching him and devouring any and all information he or an acquaintance might let slip. Living with him had also helped to give her insight to even his subtlest moods. Still, she knew that there were dark, fierce parts of Kenshin that she hadn't seen yet. No one could live a life like his and not have them.

Nevertheless, she was determined to love all of him, even the slightly scary parts, no matter how difficult it got. Knowing her temper and his communication problems, there probably would be times when it got pretty difficult. Even so, neither of them was a quitter. She would tackle those problems as she came to them, and if he did something she really didn't like, they'd talk about it – even if she had to tackle him to make sure he listened to what she had to say.

But just for today, she wasn't going to think about all of the problems. Instead, she was going to savor the fact that they loved each other. Everything was wonderful. Well, except for that singing sparrow waking her up.

Nonetheless, it was going to be a fantastic day. Dreams were fun, but reality was better. That Kenshin had given his heart to her was more precious than all the gold and silk in a thousand dream worlds. Kamiya Kaoru was excruciatingly in love.

Of course, unlike in her dream she wasn't about to get married. In fact, there hadn't been time to discuss marriage at all. They had only just admitted their love for each other, after all. Yet Kaoru had loved him for so long that nothing would feel too fast at this point, even if a priest showed up in the very next moment to marry them. She had imagined so many times what their life would be like, similar to now except that there would be more whispering of secrets in the dark of the night, straightening the ties of each other's hakama, and sharing of responsibilities.

Compounding her desire to marry him was the fact that she had a lot of urges no proper unmarried young lady should have. It didn't help her resolve to behave properly that she suspected that Kenshin would thoroughly enjoy satisfying those urges. But knowing him, he'd probably talk himself into feeling guilty for dishonoring her somehow afterwards.

There was only one solution for it – _The man needs to marry me, and soon._

However, Kaoru didn't want to drive him away by moving too fast. She also didn't want to push him into doing something he didn't want to do. Everything would be so simple if only he already wanted to marry her, but he might not.

Either way she needed to know what he thought. _But how to find out?_ She couldn't just ask him straight out; Kenshin might tell her what he thought she wanted to hear instead of what he really thought. No, she would have to be subtle, and maybe a little bit sneaky. Kaoru could do sneaky, no problem. _But subtle?_

Throwing an arm over her face she groaned. She was horrible at being subtle! Lies and evasions always showed on her face. She couldn't do subtle if her life depended on it. _Your life does depend on this, your future life with this man by your side!_ Firming her lips, Kaoru decided to give it her best shot. _Ganbatte!_

Stretching where she lay on her back, she fully extended her arms and legs across the futon and arched her stomach up into the air. With a satisfied sigh she let her muscles go limp for a moment. Then she rolled over onto her knees and stood up with a bounce.

After another good stretch, she shut the shoji and proceeded to get dressed in a pink and purple yukata spangled with white seashells and blue fish. While she searched for a matching hair tie, a delicate gold scarf folded at the bottom of her chest caught her eye. Grinning impishly, she wondered what Kenshin would do if she tried to get him to wear it today. It would bring out those gorgeous golden highlights in his concubine hair perfectly. Kaoru could feel the grin bowing her mouth threatening to burst into delighted laughter at any moment. It took no effort at all to imagine his adorably confused, "Oro?" if she made any such suggestion. Finally settling on a simple indigo ribbon, she tied up her hair into its customary ponytail.

Opening her shoji again to keep the room from getting too hot during the day, Kaoru took a deep breath of morning air. The inhalation carried the lingering scent of old rain, earth, pine needles, and something invigorating that tingled in her nose but resisted identification. In the eastern sky, wispy white clouds blended into the washed-out powder blue skyline. The sun was not yet glistening over the horizon, indicating that it was slightly earlier than she had assumed. _Silly sparrow._

Stepping quietly, she made her way to the kitchen. She saw that the room was quiet and dark when she peeked her head around the doorway. _Kenshin must still be asleep._ A grin slowly formed on her lips as she thought of a way to please the man she loved. Quickly tying her sleeves back with a cord, she set to work.

_This morning I'll make breakfast. Kenshin works so hard, he deserves a rest every now and then._

_Oh, and when Kenshin comes in, I can make a_ subtle _remark about how cooking makes me feel like a wife._ _Then, depending on his response, I'll know what he thinks of marriage. It's a perfect plan!_

Of course, this wouldn't be the first time he'd seen her cook, and she'd never said anything even remotely like that before. Did that mean it wasn't subtle? Stirring up the coals in the cooking fire, she bit her lip in dismay. _Oh it's a horrible plan… and I just got ashes on my kimono._

Sighing, she picked up the apron she'd forgotten and tied it around her waist. Hopefully by the time Kenshin woke up, Kaoru would have a plan for figuring out his thoughts on marriage. _A perfect plan._

 

* * *

 

When Kenshin woke up, it was to an instant awareness of his surroundings. Rolling to his feet, he extended his senses to ensure that all of his friends were safe. Sano and Yahiko seemed to be still asleep, but Kaoru's aura showed her to be awake and… happily busy.

He loved it when her aura felt like this, bubbling with energy and twining around his own aura like a small child tugging on his hand, cajoling him to come out and play. Performing a few quick stretching exercises, Kenshin made sure he was limber enough to handle whatever his little shihandai had to offer. Then, with a final roll of his shoulders, he adjusted his clothing and strode out of the room.

Seeing his magenta gi lying abandoned on a table in the hallway, he made a small detour to grab it and return it to his room. It was careless of him to leave clothing just lying about. Besides, he didn't have so many clothes that he could bear to lose any. He must have left it there the day before when he heard Yahiko yell about Kaoru catching the house on fire. Luckily Yahiko had been exaggerating, but in the ensuing brawl he must have forgotten about it.

Picking up the gi, he turned to go back into his room but had to freeze. Looking down in confusion, he quickly lifted the magenta cloth up to his nose and inhaled. _Kaoru… it smells like Kaoru._ Walking slowly into his room, he tried to figure out why his gi was infused with the delicate scent of jasmine and orange blossoms. After all, this was definitely his gi, and the needle was right where he had left it in the left sleeve… although he could have sworn he'd inserted the needle near the repaired tear in the shoulder and not by the cuff.

Folding the garment, he took one more whiff, closing his eyes in contentment at the layering of their two scents, before placing it on his pillow. This was a mystery he'd like to solve now, but if Kaoru was borrowing his clothes, he'd much rather catch her in the act. Smirking, he thought about 'accidentally' leaving something else in the hall later – _as an experiment._

Exiting his room again, he slid the shoji shut, careful to keep the sound of the sliding wood to a minimum so as not to disturb his still sleeping friends. Padding down the hallway, he began to hear soft, feminine humming as he neared the kitchen. Idly, he wondered what Kaoru sounded like when she sang. He didn't think he'd ever heard her do anything but hum quietly to herself when she thought no one was around. Well, he had time to discover it. Besides, didn't all mothers sing to their children at some point?

The smile on his face only widened as he rounded the corner to the kitchen and caught his first glimpse of Kaoru that morning. Her back was turned to him as she bustled around the kitchen, busy preparing breakfast. Her midnight fall of hair bounced merrily as she moved from task to task. For a moment he was content to simply stand in the doorway and drink her in.

But the knowledge that he could touch her now was too potent a lure to keep him in the doorway for long. "Good morning, Kaoru-dono," he finally said. Seeing her turn stricken eyes on him at his formality, he quickly amended his statement.

"Kaoru, little shihandai, beloved." At each salutation he took a step forward until he was standing directly in front of her. Cupping her upturned face in his hands, he gave her a gentle, worshipful kiss, confident that the other dojo residents were still sleeping.

While chaste compared to their last encounter, it was still full of heady emotion. Her lips were even softer than he remembered and the hands smoothing down his chest felt even more precious. The heat from her hands and mouth seeped into his body and warmed him down to his soul. When Kaoru tilted her chin, bringing their lips into an even closer alignment, Kenshin had to sigh into her mouth in contentment. Finally lifting his head, he saw her china blue eyes once again alight with joy.

"Good morning, Kenshin," she replied with a small smile. "I decided to make everyone breakfast."

Guiltily, he straightened. "You should not have to do that, I am sorry-" he began before she interrupted him.

"No, I wanted to do it. I woke up so filled with happiness and," for a moment she looked down shyly, but then her eyes rose boldly to his face and her hands came to rest on his shoulders, "and love, that I _needed_ to do something." Tapping him teasingly on the chin she said, "Since flinging open your shoji and jumping on you was out, I decided to cook breakfast. I've been really careful, so this should taste good."

Wrapping his arms around her waist he grinned. For some reason, he couldn't help the next remark that sprang from his lips. "Kaoru, you can jump me anytime." A giggle escaped her lips at his words.

"All right, who are you and what have you done to my shy rurouni? Because that sure sounded like Sano in there," she teased.

"Well," he drawled, voice deepening as a half-smile formed on his lips, "haven't you heard that love can change a man? Besides, a good shihandai can teach a man to do anything, and I do so want to please the teacher."

As he eagerly awaited her reply, the momentary silence caused him to consciously notice the frantic popping and sizzling he'd been hearing for the last few moments. Biting back an inappropriate laugh, he turned them so that they were both facing the stove. "Kaoru, the fish."

"Fish? You plan to please the teacher with fish?" A sudden look of horror popped onto her face as she flung herself away from him and towards the stove. "My fish!" she wailed, flipping over the smoking meat.

Coming up behind her, he looked critically at her culinary efforts. "It will be all right, it is only slightly singed."

"I tried so hard this morning, but it's ruined" she sighed dejectedly.

"No it is not. Here, let me help," he soothed, taking another step until he was flush against her back, feeling the warmth of her skin seep through their clothes into his chest. Even though he knew she didn't mind, he still felt an illicit thrill race down his spine from being so close to her. Wrapping one arm around her waist, he used the other to take hold of her wrist. When he looked down and saw her fierce, white-knuckled grip around the chopsticks, he used the tips of his fingers to stroke her wrist lightly. "Relax," he murmured into her ear. Placing his chin on her shoulder, he directed her hand to use the chopsticks to move the grilling fish over to the edge of the heat. "Now the spoon," he instructed.

He felt her rest more weight against his chest as she exchanged utensils. Bringing his chin up to rub his cheek along hers, he felt a few strands of her hair catch in the slight stubble on his face. She purred low in her throat like a content housecat at his actions. It was an effort to try and keep his concentration on the cooking instead of the warm woman in his arms. Luckily he'd prepared this meal hundreds of times, so most of his mind was free to dwell on the smell of her skin in the morning and the way her hair tickled against the skin of his chest above his gi.

Smiling, he used the hand entwined with hers to stir the steaming soup. Trailing his nose back behind her ear, he inhaled deeply. Then he had her lift up a spoonful of the miso soup to test if it was done. Bringing his face forward, he blew gently on the spoonful before directing their hands to bring it to her mouth. She took a delicate sip, pursing her plump coral lips. Enthralled, he directed the half-full spoon to his own mouth, finishing off the salty fluid as he placed his own lips where hers had been.

"How does it taste?" she asked anxiously.

"Delicious," he murmured, and he wasn't talking just about the soup. His entire focus was centered on her mouth, leaving the rest of the world to fade away.

Taking the spoon from her fingers and setting it down on the counter, he snaked his other hand up her body to tilt her head back for another kiss.

"Ohayo-, whoa!" Of course, Sano had to choose that moment to enter the kitchen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dictionary:  
> Hakama- The skirt or baggy pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. (Thanks for the clarification from Kathryn Angelle.)
> 
> Dake- Only, just
> 
> Yukata- Light-weight and simple summer or sleeping kimono/robe
> 
> Shoji- Paper sliding door
> 
> Sakabatou- Reverse blade sword that Kenshin uses
> 
> Shihandai- Assistant instructor, Kaoru's title
> 
> Rurouni- Wanderer
> 
> Ganbatte- From the verb ganbaru: (To try to) do your best, or in this case, 'I'll do my best!'
> 
> Dono- More formal suffix that elevates Kaoru over Kenshin when he uses it.
> 
> Miso- Soy bean paste used to make a salty soup (So tasty!)
> 
> Ohayou- Good morning, from 'ohayou gozaimasu.'


	15. Rolling Pins, Daikon, and Other Long, Hard, Cylindrical Objects a.k.a. Is that a Daikon or are you just happy to see me?

" _How does it taste?" she asked anxiously._

" _Delicious," he murmured, and he wasn't talking just about the soup. His entire focus was centered on her mouth, leaving the rest of the world to fade away._

_Taking the spoon from her fingers and setting it down on the counter, he snaked his other hand up her body to tilt her head back for another kiss._

" _Ohayo, whoa!" Of course, Sano had to choose that moment to enter the kitchen._

Through her shock, Kaoru distantly felt Kenshin's arms briefly tighten protectively around her, crushing her back against his chest. Her heart would have raced at the feel of his strong body if it hadn't already been galloping in horror.

Letting her go, Kenshin spun away to face Sano standing stunned in the doorway. His movement attempted to block Kaoru from view, but considering the height disparity between the two men she doubted it worked. She wondered why Kenshin even bothered. After all, Sano had already seen her in the kitchen. _How could it get any worse?_

A quick glance down answered her question. The folds of her kimono were slightly askew, baring the blush-pink skin of one collarbone and a hint of her cleavage. Mortified, Kaoru knew a stranger looking at her face would think her either drunk or sunburned. Sword-calloused and soup-sticky fingers swiftly straightened her appearance.

Of all people, Sano had to walk in! The only thing worse would be Yahiko.

Where was a tofu bucket to hide under when she needed one? Panicked eyes scoured the kitchen, but couldn't find one. What sort of kitchen didn't have a tofu bucket!

Embarrassment, like always, quickly gave way to anger. She had several burnt fish just dying to kiss Sano's gaping mouth. Unfortunately Kenshin was in the way.

_Stupid Sano, why did he have to walk in? And Kenshin, why didn't he stop cuddling before Sano came in?_ Kaoru fumed silently. Granted the cuddling was nice, very nice, but she didn't want people to see them doing it!

Glaring at the side of Kenshin's face, the only thing she could see besides Sano's bandaged hands braced against the doorframe, Kaoru noticed something odd. Below Kenshin's glaring eyes were pink-tinged cheeks. _Did he somehow not notice Sano coming? Kenshin's trained to hear people sneak up! He's supposed to get less distracted than me!_

While still mortified, Kaoru also felt a tad smug. _Go feminine wiles!_ Of course, she wasn't quite sure what she'd done to so entrance the great Battousai, but she was confident she could figure it out. Later.

_Right now I need to teach Sano a lesson about keeping his mouth shut._

After all, Kenshin didn't seem to be doing anything. Maybe he was also embarrassed, and it was true he rarely resorted to violence, but Sano was a hands-on learner. If Kenshin wouldn't teach Sano manners then it was up to the shihandai. Creeping sideways until she could clearly see Sano, Kaoru prepared to attack.

Sadly, right before she lunged past Kenshin he finally spoke up in a soft and even voice. "Sano, breakfast is not ready. We'll bring it out later." For some reason, Sano's jaw tightened. The look he shot Kenshin seemed almost disappointed, and not about the food. Kenshin's posture shifted in a nonverbal reply that Kaoru couldn't interpret.

_Whoever said that women were supposed to be the moody ones needs to live in this house for a few days,_ she thought with frustration at their odd behavior. _Well, as the only person around here without mood-swings, I guess it's up to me to straighten them out._ However,Kaoru decided she'd worry about that later. _First things first, head injuries equal memory loss, ne?_

Of course, she'd had a similar plan yesterday but had never actually gotten to carry it out. Now she had a chance to test her theory. Smiling evilly, she briefly scanned the kitchen for an appropriate tool for her… experiment. She found at least three items within easy reach. _I really need to spend more time in the kitchen._ Grabbing the rolling pin off the counter, she prepared to charge around, and if necessary through, Kenshin to reach her victim. Things would be better as soon as Sano was twitching on the floor. She had almost passed her redhead and could see the whites of Sano's eyes; anticipation hummed in her veins.

Of course, that's when things got worse. A whole lot worse – Yahiko spoke up from behind Sano. "What? What? Why are you blocking the doorway, Sano? I can't see anything!"

Kaoru's righteous fury, burning so brightly only a split second before, fizzled under the horror of hearing that voice. She couldn't handle Yahiko's teasing this morning, she just _couldn't_. Not about her new and fragile relationship with Kenshin. She'd either burst into tears or break one of his legs. Yahiko still had chores to do; she really didn't want to break his legs.

Holding her breath, Kaoru turned large, liquid eyes on her almost-victim. She now realized that the hands Sano braced against the doorframe weren't just supporting shock-weakened legs, they were keeping Yahiko out. Sano's clenched jaw softened at her wordless plea.

Then Sano turned his head toward Kenshin and _glared._ This unusual action shocked Kaoru into a surprised twitch and the abrupt motion proved too much for her horror-limp fingers, causing them to lose their precarious grasp on the wooden rolling pin. It rebounded off the ground with a **BANG**!

Kenshin twisted lightning-quick at the sound and caught the rod in mid-rebound. However, he never even looked at the rolling pin. Instead, his concerned golden eyes focused on her face. After all of the shocks of the morning, her mind only numbly commented, _Yes, definitely have to straighten that out later._

"What was that?" Yahiko asked worriedly from his position behind Sano. "It's just Kenshin and Kaoru in there, right? Are we under attack again?"

Tuning in the doorway, Sano seized Yahiko in a headlock and started dragging him away. Outraged, the boy kicked and squirmed. "Hey, lemme go!"

"Jou-chan's cooking in there, squirt. Distracting her will just make the food taste even worse."

"Noooooo! Kenshin, how could you?" wailed Yahiko as he was dragged down the hall. _Thank goodness for Sano, even if he did have to use my cooking as a distraction,_ thought Kaoru grudgingly.

Wilting against the wall, she felt her emotions rioting; she didn't know what to feel first. Kenshin softly placed the rolling pin back on the counter. Then he came over and cupped her face tenderly in his hands.

"I'm sorry." His long fingers smoothed across her still burning cheeks gently. Bringing her hands to rest against his waist, she met his contrite honey eyes. They reminded her of a scolded puppy. It wasn't fair. She hadn't gotten to yell even once before he'd turned those irresistible eyes on her. Sighing, she looked down and wrestled her emotions into order.

When she had regained control of herself she raised her head with a crooked smile. Lacing her hands behind his back she asked quietly, "Kiss me, Kenshin?"

Momentary surprise danced across his face, quickly followed by a soft smile. "With pleasure."

One strong hand lovingly cradled the nape of her neck while his other feathered across her kimono-covered collarbone. Parting her eager lips, Kaoru met his descending mouth halfway. Only their arms and mouths touched each other, but it was enough. It was exactly what she needed.

Their lips melded slowly, thoroughly reacquainting themselves with the other's shape and texture. When his tongue finally slid into her mouth and curled against her own, Kaoru could taste a lingering hint of miso combined with something smoky, dark, complex, and purely Kenshin. Sipping at his mouth, she hummed contentedly. Kaoru could have blissfully continued kissing him all day.

However, the boys were waiting for breakfast and she didn't want to be walked in on a second time. The same thought must have occurred to Kenshin, because his tongue regretfully retreated back into his mouth. For a few more moments they lingered with their lips caressing and clinging. When their mouths finally separated, Kenshin leaned his forehead against hers and smiled into her eyes.

"Shall we serve breakfast?" he asked.

Letting go of his waist, she kissed him on the nose fondly. Then she turned to get the bowls. She couldn't express how giddy it made her feel to be able to act on the romantic impulses she'd been repressing for so long. "I guess we can't avoid them forever," she sighed.

"No, it seems like we're destined to be interrupted." As he spoke his arms rubbed comfortably against hers as he grabbed several trays out of the cupboard.

Relaxed silence, broken only by the clicking of cups set down upon lacquered trays, filled the kitchen while they worked. Looking up from her task of pairing matching chopsticks, Kaoru noticed he was staring at her instead of assembling dishes. It had been several moments since she'd heard any sounds from his corner of the kitchen. _Just how long had he been staring?_ The open love in his eyes, banked and hidden from her for so long, sent warm tingles from the center of her chest to the tips of her toes. "Kenshin?"

"Kaoru, about the future, I want you to know-" he paused as if struggling with his words.

"You want me to know what?" she asked breathlessly, wondering if this was the moment she'd been hoping for.

Suddenly Sano's raucous voice shattered their intimate moment. "We're still waiting for food here!"

Kenshin sighed at yet another interruption. "We will have to finish this discussion later. Yahiko and Sano need to be fed," he commented softly, completely bypassing her question.

"Mou," she growled as she turned back to the chopsticks.

"Kaoru," Kenshin's voice hesitated again. She looked up hopefully, but his face was hidden. All she could see were his strong hands precisely arranging the steaming bowls of rice onto a tray. "Sano cares about you and only wants you to be happy. You do not need to worry."

Disappointment at his topic turned to anxiety. "But what if he says something?"

"You do not need to worry about what he might say," Kenshin soothed. "He is just trying to protect you."

"From what?"

"From me." Kenshin chuckled at the flabbergasted look on her face. "He's worried he might have to protect you from me."

"What? That's ridiculous!" Her face twisted into a scowl and her hands clenched. _I oughtta pound some sense into that roosterhead!_

The amused smile faded from Kenshin's features. "Not completely," he said seriously.

"What do you mean?" she asked. Putting down the handful of chopsticks she'd collected onto his tray, Kaoru gave him her full attention.

"Kaoru," he kept his gaze centered on the not quite simmering water in the teakettle on the stove, "you are a beautiful and single young woman with no family to look out for you."

Kaoru blushed at his compliments but refused to be sidetracked. "I can look out for myself! Besides, you guys are my family."

"Which is why Sano is acting like a protective older brother. Most of the women Sano has known growing up aren't… treated very nicely."

Kaoru knew he was trying to imply something, but she had no idea what. Her confused silence caused Kenshin to look up from the now steaming teakettle. Sighing, he looked back down and poured the hot water into a teapot already holding a handful of tea leaves. After replacing the lid, he set it on another tray.

Then he turned and took up her hands in his own. He seemed to be comparing the shapes of their hands as he thought, tracing the outline of her nails, the calluses from her bokken, and the webbing between her fingers. She would have tried to read his face, but he kept his expression hidden behind the shadows of his auburn hair. His playing with her fingers felt very intimate. The longer the silence stretched on the more his touch made her imagination veer off into unsafe areas, especially unsafe considering the two hungry boys only a hallway away. Shifting her weight, she blew her bangs out of her eyes. Patience had never been her strong suit. "Kenshin?"

Finally he spoke, "He doesn't want you taken advantage of."

_But what if I want you to take advantage of me?_ _What if I want to take advantage of you?_ Kaoru mused wickedly. The boldness of her own thoughts surprised her a little. _The kissing has definitely gone to my head._

"Kissing a woman secretly in dark corners is not very respectful, that it is not." Amethyst eyes peaked out at her contritely.

Kaoru felt a spurt of panic at his words. Was her happiness going to unravel so quickly? Her relaxed hands tightened around his clasped fingers. "People who are courting kiss secretly all the time!" She wasn't actually sure about that, but she had the feeling that he didn't have a lot of experience with proper courting techniques either. Besides, she liked his secret kisses!

"And we are courting, aren't we Kenshin?" Her question came out more threatening and commanding than she'd intended. It also ruined her plans about subtlety discovering his intentions. _Curses! When in doubt, keep talking… or hitting._

"You are the most respectful and honorable man I've ever met. When I think how long I've been trying to get you to drop the _dono_ from my name I could scream! I love you, I trust you, and I know you respect me. Both Sano _and_ you should know it, too."

Huffing at the idiocy of men, Kaoru went to grab a tray of food. That's when she saw the partially chopped radish still sitting next to the tray. It had been weapon choice number two when she'd earlier searched for a weapon to beat up Sano. Grabbing the daikon, she slammed it over Kenshin's head in punishment.

With a confused "oro" and swirly eyes, her rurouni held his abused crown as she stalked from the room.

"Honestly!"

* * *

Rubbing his sore head, Kenshin ruefully wondered if Kaoru had ever looked for a weapon and _not_ found one. Sometimes he thought himself safe, not seeing any shinai or bokken near-to-hand. Then her anger would flare, her sea-storm eyes would glitter, and, caught up in her magnificent beauty, he would suddenly find himself walloped unexpectedly by some other hard, cylindrical object she had pulled out of nowhere.

Picking up the other breakfast tray, he made sure that everything, especially his rurouni mask, was in place. Satisfied, he walked out into the dining room where everyone seemed to be already eating their over-cooked rice. With Sano, Kaoru, and Yahiko all angry at him, no one had waited. _At least they aren't all waiting to fly at me. Those sorts of mornings can be difficult to recover from._ Resigned, he sat down at his customary place.

As soon as he had settled, Kaoru started serving him food. It was interesting to watch the expressions of solicitousness and irritation war across her body and face. Apparently he wasn't the only one to think so, either.

"Hey Busu, keep twitching like that and you're gonna knock the teapot over! Since Kenshin made it, it's the only thing that tastes good. You really should just stay out of the kitchen," Yahiko drawled through a mouth full of half-chewed fish.

All gentleness fled from Kaoru's face. Only anger-narrowed eyes remained. "You little brat, I don't see you cooking anything!"

"That's because it's Kenshin's job."

"Oh? Then what is your job around here, Yahiko- _chan_? Do tell," Kaoru rejoined sarcastically.

Yahiko straightened his small shoulders and puffed out his chest. "I'm here to keep you guys out of trouble."

Sano stopped chewing to give Yahiko a wide-eyed look of disbelief. Lips twitching, Kaoru also stared at the pint-sized samurai. Then she met Sano's eyes across the table. Immediately the two of them burst into laughter.  
"It's not funny!" Yahiko protested angrily. "Shut up!"

Finally their laughter died down and breakfast resumed. Yahiko, however, was still fuming. "I'm gonna go practice my strokes in the courtyard," he abruptly announced. Gulping down the last of his tea, he jumped up from the table and stomped from the room.

Kenshin hardly noticed Yahiko's absence. He was too busy trying to figure out who he should try to get alone for a talk first: Sano or Kaoru. He had just decided on Sano when he saw the man lock eyes with Kaoru over the teapot. _Was Sano going to try and have a big brother talk with Kaoru first? I don't want him to worry her, despite I what said to her about his good intentions._

Before Kenshin could figure out how to head the street fighter off, Sano winked at Kaoru. Then he silently mouthed, 'out of trouble.' This set Kaoru off into a gale of giggles. Soon the two of them were rolling on the floor, gasping for breath. Whenever things started winding down, one of them would squeak out the word "trouble," setting off another round of hysteria.

Seeing his plan of having any sort of rational conversation with either of them go up in smoke, Kenshin sighed. Gathering up the dirty bowls, he began clearing off the table. _When in doubt, clean._

After the two of them calmed down, Sano would probably head into town and Kaoru would change and then go practice in the dojo. Considering both Sano's and Kaoru's reactions to the scene in the kitchen, he had some decisions to make. Things would have to go either forward or backward. His hope to simply bask in the present situation didn't seem like much more than a pipe dream in the light of morning.

While he wanted to try and reassure Sano, he had to decide what his own intentions were first. Things once again did not seem simple, not as they had yesterday in the dojo. His love for Kaoru hadn't changed. The difference lay in his certainty over further exposing her to his darkness. The closer they got, the less he would be able to shield her from. Was he right to allow that?

In the end, the most important thing was Kaoru. _What would be best for Kaoru?_ As her name floated across his mind, he looked over at her sparkling eyes and laughing lips. Her joy made warmth blossom inside his chest, as if he'd walked out into a sun-drenched meadow strewn with wildflowers.

Opening the shoji wider in preparation for the heat of the day, Kenshin squinted at the bright yellow sun and wondering what weather today would bring. A few clouds lingered in the sky like a child's forgotten toys. From the sighs and shuffling sounds in the room behind him, he surmised that Kaoru and Sano were finally composing themselves and leaving.

Finding himself staring blankly at the sky a few moments later, Kenshin shook his head briskly. _Stop procrastinating._ _You can't avoid it forever._

Their relationship had changed yesterday in the dojo. It would change again today. He would meet Kaoru there, he decided. They would talk. And when he left he would know his future fate, one way or the other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dictionary:  
> Hakama- The skirt or baggy pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. (Thanks for the clarification from Kathryn Angelle.)
> 
> Dake- Only, just
> 
> Shihandai- Assistant instructor, Kaoru's title
> 
> Rurouni- Wanderer (Kenshin)
> 
> Miso- Soy bean paste used to make a salty soup (So tasty!)
> 
> Ohayou- Good morning, from 'ohayou gozaimasu.'
> 
> Daikon- A long, white radish
> 
> Mou- Kaoru's expression of exasperation or annoyance
> 
> Bokken- Wooden sword
> 
> Shinai- Bamboo sword
> 
> Busu- Ugly old hag


	16. Tumbling Kaoru

Kenshin came into the kitchen with the last load of dirty breakfast dishes. In a testament to everyone's hunger, not even a grain of rice remained in the bowls, despite the rice's crunchy consistency. Although Kaoru's food usually came out tasting strange, the men in the house had all at some miserable point in their lives eaten worse. That or experienced the pangs of not having anything to eat at all. As far as he knew, Kaoru had never known the desolation of crippling hunger. _And she never will as long as I draw breath._

Shaking off such grim thoughts, Kenshin put down the dishes and fetched the buckets of water by the doorway that Yahiko had filled the night before. He made quick work of preparing the soapy water. Then he dipped the first cup into the bucket with a _swish-plop_ and began scrubbing with a dishrag. The vortex of white bubbles caused by his movements tickled the skin along the back of his wrists and made him involuntarily smile.

Rubbing his thumb along the rim of the smooth pottery, he identified the teacup as the one Kaoru had been using. He recognized the slight chip on the rim from when he'd been staring at her lips while she sipped. Letting an almost predatory half-smile grace his mouth, he moved the teacup to the clean rinse water and then dried it carefully. His fingers couldn't help but caress the rounded curve of the cup as he put it away. _If only it was flesh and not clay beneath my fingers_ , he thought whimsically. _Ah Kaoru, what am I to do with you?_

Unable to answer that question easily, Kenshin returned to the pile of dirty dishes. Methodically he washed, rinsed, and dried the bowls and serving plates. The act of cleansing had always soothed him. It wasn't hard to fall into the usual rhythm.

Yet today the motions didn't have the desired side-effect. Despite his best efforts, his mind just wouldn't settle down. Thoughts of Sano's disapproval, Kaoru's innocence, and his own possessive actions advanced and retreated across his mind like waves on a storm-tossed beach, shifting his sandy foundation with each splash.

As his hands reached for the last forlorn cup, accompanied only by the pile of abandoned chopsticks, he suddenly felt strange. Looking up, he tried to identify what was wrong. It wasn't danger or menace – he was all too used to those feeling. No, it was something smaller and simpler than an attack.

Anxiously extending his senses, water dripped slowly from his fingers into the bucket below. _Plop… plop-plop_. Otherwise it was silent. No other sounds echoed through the dojo. Nothing but the faint breeze stirred the air. Kenshin licked his dry lips and tilted his head to the side. Blinking, he whispered the answer into the air, "…Empty."

The house was empty. Yahiko had finished his strokes while Kenshin had gathered up the dishes. The boy had probably run off into town to avoid more chores or teasing, because the energetic noises he made while cleaning and practicing were missing. Meanwhile, Kaoru must have finished changing from her kimono into her hakama. If she didn't have classes, she'd be practicing in the dojo this morning. When she was in the house, he could usually hear the intermittent shuffle of her tabi on the tatami. Concentrating, he could feel her in the distance moving through the courtyard where there seemed to be a napping Sanosuke. Outside the kitchen window, Kenshin could faintly make out Sano's foot on the far side of the courtyard beneath the shade of a pine.

Although not as scorching as yesterday, the sun was quickly warming the morning air in preparation for another steaming hot afternoon. A few drifting clouds provided fitful shade. Thankfully a small breeze came in through the open windows and stirred the air soothingly. It brought the scent of sun-kissed grasses, moistened earth, and pine resin.

Frowning to himself, Kenshin wondered why he felt so bizarre. The house often emptied while he cleaned up. Today was no different. Despite his reassurances to himself, the muscles along his shoulders tightened. His fists unconsciously clenched. Finger by finger he relaxed his hands. Picking up the dishrag in one hand, he grabbed the last teacup with the other. Perhaps he scrubbed a bit more ferociously than the tea remnants warranted, but that had nothing to do with the fact that he was alone. It also had nothing to do with everyone moving on with the business of the day and leaving him behind.

Kenshin sighed at his thoughts. Nothing was different about this morning from any other. The only change was his relationship with Kaoru.

Of course, the exact nature of that relationship had him twisted up inside. Kenshin didn't want to push for too much too soon, but at the same time he refused to go back to avoiding his feelings for Kaoru. If he had thought about it yesterday, he would have told himself to move slowly in exploring this new dimension to his and Kaoru's relationship. Working out a strategy, he would have figured out how to savor each new touch and discovery without pushing the limits of honor and propriety.

But he hadn't thought about that yesterday. Instead he had acted and reacted. Now he feared it was too late to go slowly and secretly. Having touched and tasted, he now could not slow down and abstain from Kaoru's lips. And having been seen by Sano, and nearly by Yahiko, he didn't think it could be kept a secret, despite his wishes.

He needed to define their relationship. Kaoru, and even Sano in his efforts to be a big brother figure, needed him to define it. Yet he wasn't sure exactly what Kaoru really wanted. Did she even desire marriage? What if Kaoru wanted to explore the feasibility of their relationship before acknowledging it openly? Considering her innocence and ignorance, he might have pushed her further physically than she was comfortable going. Yet did she want to take their relationship slowly? Or could she be as impatient as he to have them sink into each other body and soul, never to part? The right choice hovered mockingly out of reach.

If he made the wrong choice and acted too precipitously, he feared that it would shatter everything. Shattered things were sharp and painful and all too often irreparable. Shattered things were frequently abandoned or lost. How would he survive if she ended up abandoning him? If he lost his Kaoru?

Kenshin knew that he loved Kaoru and wanted her with him forever, through this life and into the next. That she loved him, for now, was also not in doubt. His conundrum rested on what actions to take next to keep her love and honor intact. He knew what actions he wanted to take. However, whether those were the right actions, and if so when he could honorably take them, were answers that eluded him.

Where was the line between doing right and being selfish? What did he have to offer except the sweat of his brow and the adoration in his heart? Would that be enough to overcome the lack of a house, reliable income, and honorable name? Didn't Kaoru deserve better than that? But how long would that better take? He didn't want to wait, yet what did honor demand? The morning sunlight puddled on the kitchen counters and banished shadows from usually darkened corners. Yet it served only to illuminate more questions in his mind instead of bringing him any sort of clarity of thought.

With exaggerated care he put the now thoroughly cleaned teacup into the bucket of rinse water. The sopping dishrag in his other hand released rivulets of soapy water down his forearm. Turning to the pile of chopsticks, he noticed through the window that the Sano-shaped lump under the pine was now gone. Only flattened yellow grass remained. It only took a split second for Kenshin to determine that Sano and Kaoru were both now together by the gate. _Most likely… talking._

The dishrag in his hand squeaked from the force of his grip, releasing violent splatters of water across his chest and the kitchen walls. Engrossed in his whirling thoughts and in cleaning the dishes, he'd missed the chance to speak to Sano about Kaoru and the scene in the kitchen. Now it was too late. What would Sano say?

Kenshin knew that Sano had the best of intentions. However, Sano wasn't known for his delicate speaking. Add that bluntness to the fact that Sano was also a man and _had_ to suspect what kind of thoughts Kenshin was having about Kaoru, thoughts that Sano had already warned Kenshin not to act upon, and that equaled trouble. What would Sano say in his attempt to help them? And how would Kaoru react? Would it make her change her mind about them? Or confuse her into thinking that he only wanted to kiss her in dark corners and rain-cloaked dojo? His heart ached at the thought of Kaoru retreating from the brush of his fingers with distrust in her eyes.

He would have to talk to her. Things with Sano needed to be cleared up too, but that would have to happen later. Kaoru came first. Kenshin couldn't have Kaoru misunderstanding things. If he could just get her alone, he would explain. He would make things right.

Releasing a heartfelt sigh that ruffled his bangs and the soapy film of bubbles skimming the bucket, Kenshin returned to cleaning the remaining chopsticks. It was too late to interrupt them now. He would let Sano say what he needed to say. For the conversation to come, Kenshin didn't want anyone there but himself and Kaoru. What he had to say was private. At least, it would be private, once he figured out what he wanted to say. Rinsing the last chopstick, Kenshin had a disturbing vision of his future.

If he didn't figure out the right thing to say to Kaoru, he would end up alone. Alone without even a kitchen to clean or call his own, much less a tempestuous shihandai to caress and cuddle. He'd already hurt Kaoru by his lack of action and mixed signals in the past. She deserved better than that and would not for long accept less than the full measure of what he had to give.

Kenshin was tired of holding back. He was so sick and tired of restraining his impulses around this most precious person in his life. Picking up the dry towel, he rubbed the beads of moisture off of each chopstick intently. Yesterday in the dojo he'd acknowledged and forced himself to accept that being with Kaoru would put her in danger. It had been his main stumbling block in deciding for so long not to pursue her – or so he'd always told himself.

Strange that in all of those revolutions of sun and moon spent agonizing over his Kaoru-dono, he'd never put into words what having her so close would do to him. Part of it had been not wanting to torture himself with something he thought he'd never have. It didn't take more than a hazy daydream to realize that loving and being loved by Kaoru would be glorious.

But what he'd really been unwilling to face directly before yesterday was what lurked behind that glory: the intangible, emotional dangers that making himself vulnerable by openly loving Kaoru would bring to him. Inside his mind, far down beneath the rurouni mask, an inky abyss seethed and churned. That shadowed pit wasn't evil, though it could be in the wrong circumstances. From that place came the darker edges to his feelings of lust and possession. Those ebony emotions flavored his fights and spiced his fear. Even now, Kenshin still hadn't completely accepted that part of himself. If he couldn't fully accept it, how would Kaoru?

Despite these dangers, he could not help but love her with his whole heart. He didn't know how to reserve a part of his heart for himself, separate and able to survive if the rest should die. He hated even thinking about losing her, yet his mind delighted in torturing him with the innumerable possibilities. It terrified him. Yesterday he'd hinted at his fear in their conversation in the dojo. Nevertheless, hand-in-hand with that fear now came exhilaration. A glorious future hovered before him, begging him to leap forward and grasp it.

Unfocused eyes gazed at the two buckets of used dish water. Kenshin felt caught in a snare of ominous _what if_ s. The ropes and wires of the self-made trap bound his thoughts in tangles and kept him from lifting himself up to see past the weeds of his doubts and fears.

Yet was he not a master of the blade? Didn't he have the tools and training to cut through snares? He had spent his entire life honing not only his body, but his mind. All for the purpose of accomplishing whatever goals he set himself.

Kenshin knew success. He knew fear and he knew, more rarely and bitterly, failure. Making decisions and carrying them through to the very end had long ago become a familiar task. He had never been an indecisive man. _Now was not the time to change that._ Indecision was a paralyzing force that would only cause him and those he loved unhappiness. So the question, here and now, was what to do now that he'd told Kaoru he loved her.

Walking away was impossible. Could he keep their relationship quiet? Should he? Would it be possible to secretly court her, romancing her in private while keeping a public distance? Was it wrong to want most things to stay the same? Acknowledging to himself that he'd come to dislike change made Kenshin feel like an old man: gray haired, toothless, and inflexible. It wasn't a flattering picture. Putting away the last of the dishes, Kenshin realized that he had to face his fears in order to banish them. This, then, was a fear of losing the happiness he had now by grabbing for more.

Shaking his head in frustration, Kenshin realized that his opposing fears and desires were trying to paralyze him. On the one hand, he wanted marriage and complete possession of Kaoru now, but worried that he didn't have enough to offer in return. On the other hand, he didn't want to move too fast for fear of overwhelming Kaoru and ultimately scaring her away. Beneath that lurked a fear of exposing too much of his soul and being rejected and abandoned. A small, bitter smile twisted his lips.

_Sometimes I look at Kaoru and worry that she's too idealistic. Instead, I should worry that I'm too cynical. When I first met Kaoru I decided to pause in my travels to watch her practice the sword that protects without killing, even though I still didn't completely believe in such an ideal._

_I've always admired Kaoru's capacity to believe the best of people and situations. She doesn't let fear hold her back. I want to have that fearlessness._

Looking into his mind, deep past the clutter and chatter of a thousand moments and musings, Kenshin found his peace. In that peace, he sliced away his fears. He realized that he already had the answers to most of his questions. Without the fears blinding him he understood what to do. More important than what he thought Kaoru needed was what _she_ thought she needed. _Of course, that didn't preclude spoiling and surprises._

It was now obvious how honor and happiness could be served. In that place of tranquility he knew what he had to do. Coming back to himself in Kamiya Kaoru's kitchen, Kenshin knew what he wanted to do. He could visualize his hoped for end, that glorious end, and he would pursue it with every drop of blood and cunning he possessed.

Kenshin knew what he wanted, he'd acknowledged his fears, and he would accept that he wasn't perfect. Mistakes would be made, but they were strong and would overcome them together. He was going to seize that beautifully imperfect life with Kaoru.

Resolved, he reached forward to pick up the buckets of used dish water. The sooner he finished with the kitchen the sooner he could talk to Kaoru. As he moved, the damp fabric of his gi clung annoyingly to his chest. When he'd squeezed the dishrag so hard earlier, it had liberally soaked his front. Standing back up, he tossed his head back to flip the wet strands behind his shoulders where they wouldn't tickle his skin or get in the way. Then he took a deep breath and let it out slowly, feeling the renewal of his next breath. At the door he paused, slipped on his sandals, and walked outside to dump the water out of the buckets.

Upending first one and then the other bucket, Kenshin glanced towards the gate. Kaoru stood there slim and straight in her new dark blue hakama. Her body was limned by a patch of golden sunlight bordered by cloud-shaped shade, and Kenshin had to squint at her white-edged brilliance before his eyes adjusted.

Sano stood in front of her with one hand resting on his hip comfortably. The street fighter smiled down into her cornflower blue eyes. Whatever he said next made her laugh.

 _They're standing too close,_ Kenshin thought with a small surge of jealousy. Kaoru grinned slyly and murmured something too low for Kenshin to hear clearly.

Whatever it was sent Sano into a frenzy of denial and Kaoru into giggles.

"Just remember what I said, the first part," Sano said cryptically after she calmed down. Then he reached out and tweaked her nose.

Again her full-bodied laugh rang out across the courtyard as she swatted Sano's shoulder in affectionate exasperation. Chuckling, Sano dodged around her next blow and jogged off towards town. "See ya later, Jou-chan."

Frustrated, Kenshin realized he should have come out earlier to overhear what Sano had to say. At least Kaoru didn't seem too upset. Of course, she hadn't seen him yet. Shaking her head, Kaoru made her way from the sun drenched courtyard into the shadows of the dojo.

After returning the buckets to the kitchen doorway, Kenshin released the cord that had held his sleeves up and out of his way while he cleaned. Musingly he rubbed the damp cloth of his gi front between his finger and thumb. _Perhaps I should change into something nicer and… drier?_

But he only owned one nice gi and Kaoru would become suspicious as soon as she saw him wearing it. He didn't want to give her that sort of forewarning about the talk to come. Not that this was going to be a battle, but he wanted every advantage he could get when it came time to persuade her. If he had to retreat unsatisfied, he could always change into his nice gi later and come back to Kaoru after thinking of another argument.

Besides which, he didn't want to waste the time it would take to change. He wanted to see Kaoru _now_. Hopefully the heat of the day would dry it quickly. If not, he would soon be too busy to notice a little thing like a damp gi. Running his fingers back through his bangs in a last-ditch attempt to straighten them, he strode off towards the dojo and his practicing shihandai.

* * *

Finishing the last bokken slash of her warm-up kata, Kaoru saw something red flick in and out of the corner of her eye. Without turning around she couldn't see what was causing it. Curious, she completed her form before lowering her bokken and pivoting around on her left foot.

"Kenshin!" she exclaimed in nervous surprise. He stood between two open shoji. The bright sunlight reflecting off the yellow dirt and pale grass in the yard outside made the contrast of his dark gi and still form look slightly menacing and otherworldly, like the guardian statues found outside of Buddhist temples. The bright highlights cast by the sun in his hair could have been streaks of faded gold paint.

After her talk with Sano, Kaoru knew what she had to do. _I had just hoped to have a little more time to think up a plan of attack. That or time to figure out something a little more feminine and less violent than an attack._

She wondered if Kenshin stood there silhouetted in a bid to catch her attention, or if he merely waited for his eyes to adjust to the darker dojo. If the latter, it would be the perfect opportunity to catch him off guard. After all, hadn't he told her this morning that she could jump him anytime?

Suppressing a wicked smirk, Kaoru decided to take some of Sano's advice, albeit in a way he probably hadn't intended. _Time for step one in her plan to try and get Kenshin to fall in line._

"Are you here for your private lesson? I've been waiting," she invited, consciously repeating her words from the day before. Her palms had started to sweat, but she couldn't wipe them off because she didn't want Kenshin to notice. Megumi always made flirting seem so effortless. _What if Kenshin didn't respond?_ Confidence wavering, Kaoru suddenly flashed back to the delightful kisses and caresses Kenshin had given her recently. The memories filled her with self-assurance. _Not to mention tingles_ , she thought impishly.

 _Sano said to be direct with Kenshin. If Kenshin happens to be so distracted by my kisses that he momentarily forgets all about his guilt and misgivings over potentially putting me in danger, and if that forgetfulness happens to_ somehow _lead to a proposal of marriage… well, that's my business. What Sano doesn't know ahead of time can't hurt him._

The fact that Kaoru had no idea how to cause memory loss with kisses instead of blunt objects was no reason to panic. She'd figure it out. After all, wasn't she a quick learner?

Before talking to Sano, Kaoru had been worried about pushing Kenshin into a commitment he might not want to make just yet. Sure he'd said, "I love you" and "forever" yesterday, but he'd also confided his fear of getting too close. Just because he said he was willing to take that risk in the heat of the moment didn't mean that his heart and mind had had time to fully accept it. Besides which, her rurouni, no, her _man_ was too used to worrying and disparaging himself. He probably needed time to get used to the idea of her love and devotion, _though how he could ever have doubted it is beyond me_ , and the idea of becoming a settled family man.

Kaoru had been willing to give him that time. She still was. But what Sano had said when they had talked together earlier by the front gate also made sense. Asking for a more concrete commitment and giving him time didn't have to be mutually exclusive. They could have a long engagement, after all, and then Kaoru could feel more comfortable about kissing him in private. She just had to figure out how to get Kenshin to agree.

At least Sano had confidence in her. His words earlier that day by the gate had meant a lot to her.

"Kaoru," Sano had said in an awkward yet earnest voice that she'd rarely heard from her rough-and-tumble friend, "don't settle."

"What do you mean?" she'd questioned with a confused wrinkle to her brow. "Settle for what?"

"Your relationship with Kenshin," he ignored her squeak of surprise beyond an amused twitch of his lips. "Don't settle for what you think you can get. Compromise on the little things, yes, that's the nature of a relationship, but for the things that truly matter to you, the things that will make a difference in how you regard yourself and your honor… don't settle. You know your worth." Grinning wryly, he added, "And so does Kenshin when he isn't thinking with, well," he gave her a sideways glance before snickering and finishing his sentence, "something that boys think with too often."

Kaoru hadn't been sure exactly why Kenshin would be thinking with his stomach, if indeed that was what Sano was implying, but she got the gist of it. After all, she spent more time with men than with other women. She knew how stupid guys could be.

"Besides, Jou-chan," he paused for a moment as if gathering his thoughts before continuing. " _Kaoru,_ you're strong and smart. I know you can figure out how to keep Kenshin in line. You just have to be direct and tell him what you want. It may surprise you," he lowered his voice as if confiding a dirty secret, "but most men don't understand the way a woman thinks."

"I'm shocked," Kaoru replied in a dry voice, turning to sarcasm to mask her embarrassment at his praise. Sano laughed.

"Now sometimes, Kenshin is as dense as a rock." This revelation wasn't breaking news to Kaoru. Impatiently she waited for Sano to get to the point instead of just standing there trying to look wise. "And sometimes, he's pretending to be dense to make a situation play out the way he wants it to or to give himself time to think of a better strategy. I know, or I _assume_ ," he stressed the last word, "that the kissing is a recent development."

Kaoru blushed, but Sano seemed to be waiting with folded arms for some kind of reply. Despite his annoyingly smug look, Kaoru found herself grudgingly answering his implied question. "Er, yesterday," she mumbled.

"Ha, I thought so," he smirked. Kaoru's blush faded as she let out a growl at his teasing tone. "Simmer down, Jou-chan. I just want you to know that, that if, that you, that-" the smirk disappeared from Sano's face as he became red and stumbled over his words. Sucking in breath until his puffed out cheeks made him look like a blowfish, Sano turned to stare up at the sky as if asking for divine aid, finally blowing out his breath in one long exhale.

"I just want you to remember that it's your body and you get to decide how far you'll go, and if- if," sweat began dripping down Sano's beet red cheeks and off his nose, "if you have any questions about, well, how it, uh, works, or what's too far or, um, if Kenshin does something that makes you uncomfortable, or is acting dense about a problem, you can, ah, come to me." He finished in a gruff voice, "No matter what it is," he looked down and into her wide eyes, "you can tell me. I promise."

Cheeks at least as dark, if not darker, than Sano's she replied, "Thanks." Smiling embarrassedly into his concerned eyes, she whispered, "I really appreciate it."

Resuming his usual cocky attitude he answered, "No problem." Then he shook his finger at her and added with a grin, "Don't forget – be direct and don't settle!"

"I know, I'll remember," she promised.

"Good. And don't forget that the man adores you. Use that to your advantage." Kaoru couldn't help but laugh at his assertion and advice.

Looking at him from the corner of her eyes she asked slyly, "Is that what Megumi does with you?"

Sano started sputtering incoherent denials while she giggled. Finally giving up, he folded his arms and scowled at her until she stopped laughing. "Just remember what I said." When her lips twitched again he added hastily, "The first part." Then he reached out and tweaked her nose.

Laughing as he dodged her second retaliatory swat and ducked out of reach, Kaoru waved him away towards town and headed towards the dojo. She planned to use her warm-up kata to clear her thoughts.

After her workout she was going to figure out what to do about Kenshin, but he'd shown up before she had the chance. Hopefully the flirting plan would work out. Megumi did it all the time. How hard could it really be?

Huffing out a nearly inaudible laugh at her invitation for a 'private lesson,' Kenshin stepped into the dojo, sans sandals of course. _I can't believe the taking off of his sandals didn't tip me off yesterday. I agree with Sano that Kenshin is dense, but if Sano ever finds out about me mistaking Kenshin for a fantasy, I'll never hear the end of it. He might try to give me the title of densest dojo resident instead!_

Striding over to the weapons rack, red hair and white hakama swishing quietly, Kenshin picked out a bokken. Then he moved on silent feet until he stood in front of Kaoru's confused form in a ready stance. "We never did finish our lesson, did we?" Waving his other hand in an invitation to advance, he smiled enigmatically. "Shihandai?"

It wasn't quite the type of practicing she'd intended. Licking a bead of salty sweat off the corner of her mouth nervously, Kaoru tried figure out his actions. With a quirk of his lips, Kenshin had seized control of the situation and sent her off balance. Had he somehow deduced her plan? After all, Kenshin didn't spar with her or with any of the dojo residents. Period. Then again, before yesterday Kenshin also didn't nibble on her lower lip or secretly trace romantic words on her back during dinner either.

Although confused, Kaoru decided to follow his lead for now. So maybe flirtatious words weren't being _direct_ direct, but there were other ways to be direct and get Kenshin to do what she wanted. Maybe while he wiped the floor with her using his battoujutsu skills she'd think of one. Or even better, maybe he'd slip up and she'd manage to wallop him a good one and then run away.

Actually, in a perfect world she'd be able to wallop him and then sit on him. Trapped by her fierce martial skills and dazzling beauty, he would gaze worshipfully up into her eyes. She would condescend to ask his hand in marriage, in good times and bad, to keep her house clean and to prepare edible meals, and, joyously consenting, he would sweep her up in his manly arms and run them both to the nearest shrine to be married on the spot. Followed shortly thereafter by a trip to an exclusive teashop with a private room where she could indulge her fetish to sip tea off of his body to her heart's content.

"Kaoru?" Kenshin's voice broke through her daydream.

Looking at his concerned face, she forgot for a moment why he was standing across from her holding a bokken instead of his sakabatou. Or why he wasn't holding the money for the priest in one hand and a cup of tea in the other.

"Eh?" she replied. Kenshin's brow crinkled, forcing Kaoru to shove her fantasies to the side for the moment. "Oh, right, our lesson." Clearing her throat, Kaoru moved into an open stance with her bokken held above her head that could be used for either attack or defense.

Then she added in a voice that sounded, she proudly noted, quite sultry, "Our _private_ lesson, ne Kenshin?" The heat kindling in Kenshin's eyes made the effort more than worth it. It was stunning how his face could turn from polite concern to simmering hunger with just a few words. Kaoru was tempted to see what other words would affect him, but the predatory cast to his eyes warned her that there would be consequences. Repressing the shivers, and the impulse to drop her bokken and attack him with her lips instead, Kaoru reluctantly decided to forego the pleasure.

Right now, she was too curious to see how long she could last against him in a match. Kenshin rarely watched her practice. The few times she had noticed him watching her with lazy, heavy-lidded eyes, back when he had first moved in, had made her stomach go tight and her heart race. It was an expression she hadn't understood then. After yesterday though, she had a better idea of what it might have meant. Firming her resolve, Kaoru ordered herself to fight her best, no matter how distracting his eyes became.

Dust shimmered in the columns of sunlight standing between the two warriors. Leaves sighed on the trees outside the open shoji where the breezes blew, but inside the dojo quiet and stillness reigned. Both swordsmen waited for the other to move first. As his elbow bent slightly, Kaoru's focus sharpened. When he didn't move any farther, she waited. Drops of gold bubbled up into Kenshin's mutable irises and a faint smile crept onto his lips. Yet still he didn't advance.

In the space of a heartbeat, Kaoru committed to attacking first and swung her bokken at his head. Effortlessly, Kenshin's wooden sword blocked hers with a resounding _crack_. Kaoru disengaged their swords and sliced at his side. Bending like a reed, he evaded her attack.

The next second he launched one of his own. Quicker than a heartbeat, faster than sound, his sword was suddenly only a breath from her throat. Without thinking she twisted away from the strike, instinctively swiping at his vulnerable side. He easily avoided her attack, along with the follow-up thrust, by bringing his sword up and to the right. Several chops at his head and shoulders forced Kenshin to take a step back. This distracted him from her real objective. Spinning into a crouch, she cut lightning-quick at his hamstrings.

It had been ages since Kaoru had been so challenged. No one she practiced with necessitated such speed. Although she still wasn't at Kenshin's level, she was determined to push herself as fast as her body could possibly go.

Leaping over her slash, Kenshin rolled across the dojo floor and then flipped back to his feet next to the wall. Charging him, hopefully before he could raise his sword, Kaoru felt an exhilarated grin tightening her cheeks. She hadn't had this much fun in ages.

The dark wood of her bokken whistled towards his chest. His sword hung down on the opposite side of his body. Yet Kenshin was nothing if not fast. He met her attacks effortlessly, bringing his bokken around in a blink. Kenshin put up an intricate defense just barely beyond her level of skill. Each swing of his sword was fast enough to challenge her but not so fast that she couldn't respond.

All the same, before she knew it Kaoru found herself retreating. Dodging a sudden reversal of his bokken's direction, Kaoru discovered that she was back in the center of the dojo.

Suddenly their swords locked at the hilt. Kaoru pushed against him with all of her strength in an attempt to knock him over or send him off balance. He didn't budge.

Kaoru had forgotten how much strength his lithe body held. She knew what an amazing fighter Kenshin was, yet somehow he'd managed to hold himself back. In fact, she had been so focused on the advance and retreat of their bout that she'd forgotten just how low her chances of winning were. _Of_ _course, that doesn't mean that it's impossible._ Firming her lips and straining every muscle in her body to push Kenshin left only shifted his sword a hair's width. _Not impossible, just really really difficult._

Abruptly Kenshin twisted his wrist and flicked his bokken. Kaoru found herself stumbling backwards. Catching herself with a grunt on one knee, she glared up into his face. That was a mistake. His eyes were liquid flame, smoldering orange, red, and gold around dilated black pupils that shouted his hunger and desire. Kaoru felt her breath catch and her sword start to slip out of weakened fingers. _That look should be illegal!_ Shaking her head, she firmed her grip.

With effort she stepped forward and attacked again. _Crack-crack bam_ sang their wooden swords. It became increasingly difficult to ignore the grace of his limbs and the intense passion igniting his face. Although she'd like to blame her lack of breath on the fight, she knew more than the clashing of their swords was to blame. Her next attack attempted to strike at his shoulder, back, and side. Again he blocked her offensive combination.

While sweeping her arm behind her back for leverage to strike, Kaoru began to get a strange feeling. Kenshin dodged her thrust and forced her to pivot to the side. Suddenly she realized why. Somewhere in the middle of their fight, Kenshin had maneuvered her into reproducing the moves from the kata she'd perfected yesterday.

Yet now, instead of an imagined opponent, she faced Kenshin's wooden sword. Through the clash of their blades, Kaoru noticed his golden eyes devouring her panting lips. It distracted her again and almost threw off her next attack.

If he didn't kiss her when this was over, she would have to hit him. Then again, she should hit him anyway for distracting her so much. As he dodged her next two strikes, Kaoru growled and decided that the reasons didn't matter. She just wanted to hit him. _Landing one blow on the Hitokiri Battousai wasn't too much to ask, right?_ Of course, all of the other times she'd hit him he hadn't had a sword in his hand. And he'd never really tried to dodge. _But still!_

Kenshin's next few attacks sent her into the defensive section of her kata. Just how long had he been watching her yesterday before he'd said anything? Was he really recreating the entire kata after only watching it once?

By this point Kaoru knew what moves to perform next. Once she'd recognized the kata, Kenshin had noticed her familiarity and accordingly increased the speed of his attacks. Their blades blurred and hissed through the air, clacking together almost too fast to see. Thankfully her lifetime of practice was paying off. When her thoughts lagged, her muscles independently remembered how to move. Kaoru met him stroke for stroke.

Suddenly, Kaoru had an idea. Near the end of her kata was the move she'd needed Tomoaki-sensei's help to perfect. Coming off of that attack combination, she always had a lot of excess speed. The kata called for a dodge to the right, but if she attacked to the left instead mid-spin, the extra speed and unexpected change might give her the chance to tap Kenshin on the shoulder.

Such an attack had a much better chance of success than her other idea – distracting him mid-battle with seduction. A plan like that was almost certainly doomed to failure. Nevertheless, she was sorely tempted to send him a few scorching looks of her own, and maybe even lick her bottom lip while staring lustily into his eyes.

However, that sort of calculated flirtation was tough. It took planning and energy and skills she was only just learning how to use. Plus, for all she knew such a scheme would only serve to distract her with thoughts of his talented lips and hands while he remained unmoved. If it did work, it would probably be because he became distracted by her strange face. She could easily picture Kenshin asking if she had indigestion because her eyes were crossing and her face looked peculiar. _I will definitely have to practice the seductive look later. Maybe in a mirror?_

But for now, she would try to trick him using only her martial skills. If that didn't work, she'd add other tricks in for round two. Kaoru focused on Kenshin's sword and the placement of his body. She had to time her attack perfectly.

As for Kenshin, Kaoru noticed that he didn't seem to be focusing on her sword at all. His attention seemed more centered on the gaping v of her gi above her breast bindings. _What did he think he was looking at!_ She was trying to have a serious practice bout here. Seduction had already been ruled out. She wasn't even batting her eyelashes, so he better start paying attention to her sword skills. Not so much attention that he blocked her sneak attack, of course, but enough that she could claim she hit him fair and square!

Kaoru took a big breath to yell at Kenshin for being perverted, but that simple action focused his eyes to her chest even more. He growled predatorily. Then he looked up at her through his spiked eyelashes and licked his lips. The sound of his growl reverberated across her skin. That, combined with the lusty glint in his eyes, silenced her protest. It also crumbled her intentions to avoid part two of her plan.

If he wanted to get distracted without any seduction effort on her part, fine. Distracted meant that she could hit him to the ground, pounce on top of him, and lick those lips all the sooner. She just had to hit him first.

As Kaoru went into her final combination attack, their bokken stuck together so quickly that it sounded like falling hail. In the midst of that storm of sound, she waited impatiently for the right moment. _And… now!_ Pushing muscles as fast as they could go, Kaoru came out of her spin. Surprise widened Kenshin's eyes. Complacently he'd already moved his bokken to where she was supposed to be dodging on the right. But her sword was on the left.

Exultation filled Kaoru as her bokken neared Kenshin's unprotected shoulder. The dark wood brushed against the fabric of his gi. Then, in a move that Kaoru would swear was anatomically impossible, Kenshin's body _flowed_ around her sword.

Before she'd even had time to register disappointment, she found herself violently flung across the dojo. Hitting the floor hard, she finally rolled to a stop against the fall wall. "Ung," Kaoru groaned as she pushed herself to her knees with one hand on the wall. _At least I didn't loose my sword in the fall,_ she thought proudly as she tried to catch her breath. _I really need to plant my feet better if he's going to block like that._

"Kaoru!" Kenshin's face was white as chalk. He'd sprinted to her side barely an instant after she'd landed. Too late to catch her, but not so late that she could pretend the fall hadn't hurt, _darn it_. "Kaoru, are you alright? I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he chanted as his frantic hands ran over her limbs, checking for injury. "I shouldn't have- I just reacted- I'm so sorry. I'll never spar with you again, I promi-"

Whatever other apologies he intended to make were cut off when Kaoru brought the hilt of her bokken down on Kenshin's head, snapping his jaw shut. Kaoru finally had her breath back and she intended to use it. "You better be promising that you _are_ going to spar with me again, Himura Kenshin, because I don't want to hear anything else. I'm fine." Kenshin opened his mouth to protest again, but Kaoru smashed her palm over his lips. "I've taken worse tumbles than that before. All I have are a few bruises."

Kenshin flinched and worriedly mumbled around her hand, "Where?" Prying her fingers away from his mouth, his hands began tugging at her clothes. "Let me see, sweetheart."

The endearment earned him points, but not _that_ many. "Kenshin, you are NOT taking off my clothes." Attempting to catch his nimble fingers with hers she growled, "Stop it!"

Finally desisting, Kenshin looked up at her with agonized eyes and whispered, "I just need to make sure you're not hurt."

Sighing, Kaoru brought her hand up to tenderly cup his cheek. "Kenshin, I probably have more marks on my body from your kisses yesterday than I do from this little tumble, and you don't see me complaining about that, do you?" The worry lessened in his eyes.

Kaoru smiled up at him teasingly. "I think the real reason you don't want to spar with me again is that I almost had you." Kaoru patted his cheek condescendingly. "I know that male egos are fragile, but there's no shame in getting beaten by a woman. It's okay to be scared," Kenshin's lips twitched in almost a smile. "Next time, I'll fling you across the dojo and then we'll be even. Please note that I managed to hold onto my bokken despite the tumble. I'll be testing to see if you can do as well. Deal?"

For a moment Kaoru thought that Kenshin was going to continue arguing. His mouth opened slightly and his eyes frowned. Holding her breath, Kaoru turned pleading eyes on his face and bit her lip. After a slight pause he closed his mouth. Softening eyes gazed ruefully down into hers. "I'll have to remember to avoid that look in the future," he murmured. "Deal."

Grinning victoriously, Kaoru pulled his chin forward and gave him a quick kiss. Then she leaned back. Kenshin threaded his hands into the hair at the nape of her neck and pulled her forward again. "That's not how you seal a deal," he breathed against her lips before his mouth came down on hers. Slanting his lips over hers, he coaxed her mouth open for his tongue to plunder. It stroked along her bottom lip before slipping inside.

Each time Kaoru tasted his lips, she felt a zing of pleasure. She loved the softness of his mouth and the ardency of his hands. Smoothing her palm down to rest against his collar, she rubbed her fingers up and down the cords of his neck. Languorously their tongues rubbed together. She could feel his hum of pleasure through the pads of her fingers. Her other arm, still clutching her bokken, wrapped around his waist. Having the hilt pressed against his spine like that couldn't be comfortable, Kaoru distantly realized, but it was difficult to wrench her attention away from the delightful events taking place in her mouth.

After a few more drugging kisses, Kenshin pulled away from Kaoru and smiled. Letting out a happy sigh, she unwrapped her arm from his waist and put the bokken down by her side. "Kaoru," he said as he threaded their fingers together, "are you sure you're alright?" His eyes peeked up at her contritely.

"Mou, Kenshin!" Kaoru exclaimed with exasperation. "After kissing me like that you should _know_ that I'm alright! For goodness sakes, I said I was fine!" _If my hands were free you can_ bet _you'd be sporting a lump right now_ , she thought with angry frustration as she turned her head turned to glare outside the open shoji.

"Hai hai, don't be mad," he said with a meekness that she found highly suspect.

Looking at his well-loved face out of the corner of her eye, Kaoru said, "I had a lot of fun sparring, Kenshin. It made me happy to be able to finally share this part of my life with you." She turned her head to look him full in the face. "Thank you." His fingers squeezed her hands affectionately.

"I had fun too. At least until I blocked too hard and hurt yo-" Kenshin's words were cut off by Kaoru's fierce growl and crippling grip on his fingers.

"We're not going to speak or worry about that anymore, deshi. Understand?"

Kenshin looked up at her with confusion. "Deshi?"

"In this dojo I _am_ the shihandai and you are acting like a, what did Hiko-san call you? A baka-deshi? I can't believe I'm actually agreeing with him," the perplexed look on Kenshin's face shouted that he couldn't believe it either. "But if you mention that _insignificant_ fall one more time, I will have to punish you."

A devilish gleam entered Kenshin's eyes. "That might be fun."

"Kenshin!" Kaoru squeaked and blushed. Kenshin chuckled.

They were sitting face to face with their threaded fingers held firmly in Kenshin's lap. His thumbs caressed up and down the edges of her hands. "Kaoru, I need to ask you something."

"Yes?" she answered cautiously. If this had anything to do with her fall, she was going to kick him in the head. Of course, he was so hard-headed she'd probably break her foot.

"Kamiya Kaoru, will you marry me?"

With her thoughts consumed with the best way to render him unconscious, it took her a moment to process what he had just said. She must have misheard him. "What?" she asked blankly.

The skin around his mouth tightened. His golden eyes dulled to brass. In a controlled voice that failed to completely hide his desperation he asked again, "Kaoru, my love, will you marry me?"

Ripping her hands free from his grasp, Kaoru launched herself into his lap. "YES! Yes, yes, a hundred thousand times YES!" Grabbing his cheeks with both hands, she showered Kenshin's face with ecstatic kisses. She was laughing, she was crying, she was in love and she was going to get married! Her heart was bursting with happiness. Finally her lips fused with Kenshin's in a long, luscious, loving kiss.

When they finally broke apart, Kaoru noticed that tears stood out in Kenshin's eyes. "I love you," he fiercely declared. "If you want, we can keep this to ourselves for a little while and just explore our relationship. We don't have to get married right away. But know that some day soon, I will be taking you to the shrine. When I said forever yesterday, I meant it. For the rest of my days and nights, dawns and dusks, I want to be by your side."

Sunlight streamed over the waterfall of Kenshin's red hair, highlighting each strand. A small brown freckle stood out on his right cheek. His eyes were liquid honey, gazing at her with love and devotion. Every detail of his image engraved itself in Kaoru's memory. _I will never forget this moment. Never._

Their next kiss was slow and full of promise. Kenshin smiled sweetly into her eyes. "I want to marry you in the shrine, then come home to the dojo filled with all of our friends and have them wish you good luck and tell me how lucky I am to have a woman like you. We can even invite Hiko and ask him to make a hundred vases for all of the flowers you are going to receive. Of course, I'm sure a few bottles of good sake will slip in too, which will ensure Sano's attendance if nothing else."

Kaoru laughed through her happy tears, "That sounds wonderful." She kissed him on the nose and then leaned back. Gazing adoringly down into his golden eyes, she locked her hands behind his head and whispered lovingly, "my fiancé. Absolutely wonderful." At her words, a goofy grin spread across Kenshin's face.

Standing up, Kaoru picked up her bokken and moved to replace it on the rack. "We should go to the Akabeko for lunch to celebrate. I'd at least like to let our friends know." Glancing at him from the corner of her eye where he was retrieving his own bokken, she added, "Sano especially. Otherwise, I think the stress of the situation might give him a heart attack."

"Yes," Kenshin smiled and replaced his own practice sword. "I'd like him to stop glaring at me as well."

Kaoru gaped at him, "You mean-?"

"Don't worry. I deserved it," he added wryly.

"Kenshin!"

"Don't worry," he repeated. Looking over at her, a flirtatious grin pulled at his lips. "I'm surprised you aren't wearing your present from Yahiko."

"I am," Kaoru answered, confused by his comment as she looked down at her new blue hakama.

"No," he said mournfully, though his eyes glittered with repressed laughter, "you're not. Since it's going to be hot again today, I was hoping to find you wearing what Yahiko gave you – hakama dake." Kenshin smiled wickedly.

Unsure whether to laugh or hit, Kaoru decided to do both. Chuckles spilled from her lips as she swung her balled fist at his head. Dodging her blow, Kenshin grabbed her wrist and pulled her into his arms. Their smiling mouths met in a tender kiss. Melting into his embrace, Kaoru's last coherent thought was a delicious picture of married life with Kenshin. Together, they could sneak away to the dojo and practice their art… where both of them would be wearing hakama dake.

**The End! Owari! Finis! Tsuzukunai!**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dictionary:
> 
> Hakama- The skirt or baggy pants that some jujitsu practitioners wear, and were common male attire in Meiji. (Prior to Meiji they were only worn by the samurai class.) It has open slits from the waist to mid-thigh. Kaoru wears it to practice instead of her kimono, and Kenshin and Yahiko always wear them. (Thanks for the clarification from Kathryn Angelle.)
> 
> Dake- Only, just
> 
> Shihandai- Assistant instructor, Kaoru's title
> 
> Rurouni- Wanderer (Kenshin)
> 
> Hitokiri Battousai- Kenshin's title when he worked as an assassin during the Bakumatsu
> 
> Jou-chan- Little Missy or Little Lady, Sano's nickname for Kaoru
> 
> Tabi- Split-toed socks for wearing with sandals
> 
> Tatami- Japanese woven straw floor coverings
> 
> Shoji- Sliding paper door
> 
> Bokken- Wooden sword
> 
> Sakabatou- Kenshin's reverse blade sword
> 
> Kata- Stylized form or marital arts with a set of choreographed moves
> 
> Mou- Kaoru's expression of exasperation or annoyance
> 
> Hai- Yes
> 
> Deshi- Student/apprentice/pupil
> 
> Baka-deshi- Stupid student/apprentice/pupil
> 
> Owari- The end
> 
> Tsuzukunai- Not continuing
> 
> Thank you so much for reading!!! Please let me know if you liked the story. I particularly adore specific comments on favorite lines, images, dialog, or moments. You are wonderful!


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